Long Saudade Poems
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Written: May 16, 2025, for contest Sponsored by: Suzette Richards
*********
willingly play each kEy for me—
piano notes whisper
into water
as a misty sea bReEzE
laced w i t h intoxication
afternoon symphony of o.c.e.a.n waves
draws in—enchanting senses
dance among a seashore
upon sugar coated sands
fragrance of sea briny winds—
breathing low tide
beach leans ...
in sundown shade
swaying with melody
foLLowed twilight
as ivORy glow
we fell as rain and g a t h e r e d
in cupped hands
t.u.m.b.l.e.d to sea
soft into roots then pulled again up—
through leaves
out through sky ...
returning as mist
as weightless skin against the s.h.o.r.e
r.i.v.e.r in the shape of remembering
like w.a.t.e.r turning back to—water
MOONLIGHT silhouetted stone
rebeLLious rainbow of frozen saudade
as s.c.o.p.e from flares splatter
kenopsia in lack of memory
—plate—river sails—
ripples across the bay ...
beneath the gnarled b r a n c h e s,
a photo rests within my clutch.
time d
r
i
p
s
like h o n e y e d amber;
i long for vanished visions,
saudade, a muffled heartache.
s
moonlight streaks through tangled trees; h
a silken s i l h o u e t t e shrouds my aura. t
a gentle caress grazes my shoulder, o
memories of her touch f l u t t e r like m
the past entangles with the present;
the scent of f a d e d jasmine lingers.
as the night drones on softly,
cold air wraps around my wistful longing.
poison ivy clings to crumbling cemetery walls.
i look to the heavens for answers,
as the sky weeps and squalls in erupting solar storms.
her scattered ashes settle like snowflakes,
softly blanketing the remnants of forgotten joys,
cradling memories like delicate g l a s s.
the red thread of family ties is now seve /
/ red;
the roots asphyxiate on generational sorrow.
if the olive trees knew what
became of hands that planted them,
their oil would become t
e
a
r
s.
time’s relentless hand ticks on,
while decaying hearts beat like distant d r u m s,
resounding in the silence of cursed solitude.
True love needs no words..
"If you are around I will make sure; if you are not, my wishes will make you sail through."
It's just a feeling which allows us to carry on when we are separated.
When I met my love after craving through years. I could say nothing.. all I conveyed was through my silent tears!
"The ache of saudade, melting through silent dreary eyes."
WORD REFERENCE
Saudade is a word for a sad state of intense longing for someone or something that is absent.
Dreary means lifeless and sad.
Date. 27th February; 2021
Sponsor JCB Brul
Contest Name Without Saying I LOVE YOU
Written: August 25, 2026, for a contest sponsored by Unseeking Seeker
Quote: “The words ‘I Am’ are powerful. Whatever you attach to them has the potential to become your reality.” By Wayne Dyer
***********
Line of inquiry:
“a heartbeat pulsating as living light
free from each and every limitation
I Am that dwelling in unbound delight
the source wherefrom arises creation”
***********
I am the pulse no hand of time can bind,
The lucid light that kindles from within;
Wild by beginnings, inviolate mind,
Where all genesis rise, and all begin.
I am the breath beneath zephyr of things,
The stillness from which every motion came;
No fetter holds the pinion of my wings,
No mortal epithet confines my name.
I am the aether where the stars are sown,
The fecund dark that flowers into flame;
The hidden source where every form is known,
A sacred fire no mortal hand can tame.
Before all words, will hummed in aether light,
Ouroboros, I am the deathless breath;
A fruitful cauldron kindled into sight,
I sunder every chain that leads to death.
Velleity—a wish too weak to climb,
I sustain saudade for a home unseen;
I doubt the dark, the light, the future time,
and long for what is gone, or might have been.
It waits, a delitescent, dormant seed,
I find the I AM in the kettle-song;
Then bursts to lucent noon—a sudden need,
In grass that lifts the stone and endures strong.
Let thanatopsis have its honest say:
We are caducity, we fall as leaves.
We meet the autumn on a shorter day,
So gold, so loud, yet nobody here grieves.
We sink to earth without a sigh or tear,
To sleep in peace and wait another year.
Saudade act 1
It's my heart
Fell right beside me
Left behind
These see-through eyes bleed
Hurts so bad
This pain screams ANGRY
//KILL JOY LIES//
Dirt in my mind fiends
Forgotten how you stared behind me
Scared to hide
Who'd look to find me?
Forgot and lost
When will your lies leave?
A love so sick
//SEW STITCH//
My eyes bleed
Twisted fate
Berate
Forsake me
Penetrate
And
Mastuerbate me
Erotic play
//LOVE LIES//
To leave me
Colored lights
So bright they blind me
If you could feel
You'd feel what I see...
Saudade for friends I have lost
as I get older
I lose more people
every year
more people I knew
have died moving on
and I mourn their lost friendship
wished I had been
a better friend for them
and knew them better
and with the corona virus
spreading around the world
I will lose so many more
in the coming year
as the virus spreads
its malignancy far and wide
I lost my father due to cancer in 1985
and my sister
due to a freak illness in 2007
and my mother
due to Alzheimer’s in 2005
and my father-in-law as well in 2007
Demel Tucker
high school debate teammate
dead of HIV in 1995
Julian Bartley and his son
died in a terrorist bombing
in Nairobi in 1998
Jon Weber college roommate
dead due to prostate cancer
in 2000
Paul Simon friend from the visa line
dropped dead of a heart attack
in 2004
Ted Halstead
one of my best bosses
died of heart attack in 2007
Chris Richard
one of my former bosses
from my days in Bangkok
dropped dead of a heart attack
shortly before we were due
to have lunch in 2014
and so many others
I have lost
along the way
and soon there will be
so many more
as I get old in the corona era
“…I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.”*
Such Scripture truth braces me up with God’s grace
Propelling me to move on, bounce back, march forward
Every time my yearning for my human-fortress intensifies.
Vulnerable to attacking nostalgic angst
I’m now succumbing to the reminiscence-force
My heart cannot defy, and surely my mind can’t deny.
Vividly lingering, and now steadfastly clinging …
Images of my Dad’s cheerful countenance
Prodding and inspiring me to do my utmost
Caress of his hands, soothing my feverish forehead
Nurturing while gearing-up my faith-fortitude
The warmth of his loving fatherly counsel
Punctuated with, “I love you, my darling daughter.”
There I was with my dear Dad in his intensive care nook
Singing psalms, reading Bible verses to him
Praying fervently… yet hiding my grief.
With my hands clasped in his, I saw him smile with his boyish grin
Uttering no word, but I heard in my heart his shout of care...
Serenely, he gave up his final mortal breath
Leaving me and my siblings grateful to the Almighty Father
While singing “It is well with my soul.”
I imagined my phone ringing, “Hello, Dad… I miss you…”
Staring at his photo, I exclaimed
“I see you and Mom holding hands in heaven.”
Calendar reverberates awakening reality…
Dad’s celebrating with angels his death anniversary.**
*Hebrews 13:5 “… I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.”
Today is one month death anniversary of Dad who went home to heaven on January 2, 2019 at 5PM.
February 2, 2019
Written on the one month death anniversary of Dad who went home to heaven on January 2, 2019 at 5PM
1st place, “Loved and Lost” Poetry Writing Premiere Contest
Sponsored by Regina McIntosh; judged on 1/26/2023
1st place, “Poem Titled Saudade” Poetry Writing Contest
Sponsored by Edward Ibeh; judged on 2/24/2019
It's been eons since
Life took us in diametrically different directions
Yet melancholic memories of you
Still bloom in my mind like a flower, filling me with glee
Our fleeting union, I'll forever treasure. It's strange
Grieving the loss of what might've been. Notwithstanding
The brevity of our romance, the flame ignited between us
Still remains undimmed, flickering in the wind
I miss your captivating stories about
Your upbringing in Rio De Janeiro
I instantaneously think of you every time the song
"The Girl From Ipanema", creeps into my mind
Oh, the many fun times we had! Walking arm in arm
Under the summer sun; snuggling cozily on winter nights
The sound of your laughter, your voice
Your fragrance, the twinkle in your smiling eyes
So adoring and brimming with tender love
I remember them all too well
Thoughts and dreams of you, a smoke that will never turn to ash
If I could turn back time and relive all the happy, endearing
Even the silly moments we shared, I would. Sadly, our bond
Couldn't weather every storm that came our way
Our loving companionship, though brief, I'll hold dear
In perpetuity. Thanks for the everlasting memories
We were never meant to be
I guess that's the way destiny intended it
It's been eons since we parted ways
Like rope severed under a colossal weight
Yet melancholic memories of you
Still bloom in my mind like a flower, filling me with glee
Submitted for...
Impress Me With An Old Poem(002) Poetry Contest (Winner: 7th Place)
Sponsored by Poet Destroyer A
Date submitted: 10/08/2020
Strand Special 12 Any Form,Any Theme Poetry Contest(Winner: 2nd Place)
Sponsored by Brian Strand
Date: 12/29/2019
Best free verse April 1, 2018 to July 15,2018 Poetry Contest(Winner: 3rd Place)
Sponsored by John Hamilton
Date written and posted: 07/12/2018
Best Free Verse in July 2018 Poetry Contest/Winner(1st Place)
Sponsored by: Laura Loo
Date written and posted: 07/12/2018
My
core
eludes
convinced I’m
under a moonspell’s
magnetic pulse anchored within
across bossa nova sambas strummed on nylon strings
luminous is this moonflower’s white petals contrast the deeming darkness
under a saudade of stars symmetry an opus pleasant to the ear, there in lateral
is my b u r i e d s o u l in s o i l so l o v e ’s d e e p s t e m s s t e a m ~
into sweet fragrance lingering in dawn’s ensemble, I its exhibit an external bloom only at night’s crescent-lit grace, strands of opalescent pearls, jewels face up, yet my thirst is still unquenched,
e a c h
n
i
g
h t a r
e
n
e
w a l
I'm an ashen dove,
fading in zephyr
of wine valleys,
saturating in fog
upon enchanting hills,
draped in
grape-green silk,
where fantasies of forest,
sprout cynthia moon
of a bygone
medieval saga,
amidst heavenly
eventides,
and wailing weeds
prick my shadow,
infusing iced intentions
of the puppet's paradise~
floating in islets
of shackled bones.
My wings are
made of violet wool,
fluffed with
blueberry cotton
and stitched
with the fabric of
amethyst satin,
but as soon as
my tiptoeing feet
touch the
seafoam grass,
it stings my silent
glacial flight,
making me bleed
in chloroform-
dipped letters.
If love was a
rosy matte comet,
I would carve
pastel orchid smiles
amidst kismet-coated
cherry blossoms,
with frozen floral paints
and forgive
beige betrayals
of aqua sirens,
to which the
scents of evermore,
sweetly succumbed.
But maybe,
jasper tinted
jasmine petals,
are sewn with
poisoned thistles
whilst being
dispersed upon
the chambers of
midnight raindrops,
and those
soulful stars
in your eyes are
a mere mirage,
flourishing
false silhouettes of
a perfumed
saudade in
nocturnal negligence.
So, pardon these
bleeding metaphors
that echo sombre
sun's soliloquy in the
hazy kiss of gloom
and follow me
to the teal towers,
where this
fluorescent flesh
slumbers in enfolded
spruce leaves of
sequoia sonnets.
For, when the last petal
falls as poetry,
my soul would be
alive in wistful runes,
mourning in a
doleful decanter,
whilst eyes
would frown
in fragile promises,
wiping diplomatic
dust of dolent delusions
and knitting mists of
manipulations,
carelessly sinking~
to soil of feathered
dandelions.
Where nurtured seeds
of jade reflections,
still haven't ruptured
every pixie dust of hope,
in their life's
dormant decession,
reminisce me
as an ivory moonrise,
fluttering beyond,
dahlia chains of sunshine.