Long Liposuction Poems

Goodbye six pack hello* poetry scribes

My poetic side COSMOFUNNEL
wordsmith thanks tumblr in his noggin
ofttimes triggering babbling brook 
to swell after deluge
becoming stream of consciousness runnel
carving, gouging, and liquidating topography 
qua zee mow toe natural formed...

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Now, I am not a huge man

I'm not large by any means

In fact it is surprising

I still wear normal jeans

My pants don't have elastics

I still use normal towels

But, my BMI stats tell me

I'm a word...

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Ongepatshket torqued skewed reflection

drawn courtesy lots of byte size chalk.

When e'er I summon fat chance
to empower me self with courage 
and steal a passing glance
in the mirror then instantaneously 
hairline fractures appear
than 'afore long 
snap,...

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Filched Physiognomy – Mine revisited!

Absolute zero escape
velocity guts dance
sing days (contra and square),
cuz metabolic full abundance
abdominal adipose tissue acceptance
not in accordance
with light as a feather

miss lost acquaintance
the boy within forced admittance
as sure man tanks of...

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Tears fall from a round cherub face
Who feels her life is a big disgrace
Who feels she is just a charity case
Who takes up way too much space
Who knocked over the hand painted vase
From Italy
Because she...

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If, as hippy folklore claims, it never rains in California,
Then the watermark is never washed out of the phoney cheque,
And when you’re dead and gone there’ll be no one here to mourn ya
For it was...

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I imagine relief while feeling comfortably numb...
anesthetized courtesy central air 

analogous to gulping down
a tall glass of ice cold water, 
which equals ultimate thirst quencher,
especially for those 
experiencing onset dehydration,
the following poetic opinion/editorial  
shared...

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Life has been a story of much to tell. Full of misery and pain, as if someone had 
cast a spell. It's been so many tears, and so many worries. Will life ever be filled...

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Before I left the house
I had a chat with my mirror
To get feedback on my blouse
And guess what?

So loyal of the mirror 
It revealed answers I hadn't put questions for

Rubbed in my face was the...

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You think you could be me



With your bleach blonde hair



Your crimson lips



Your hooded stare



You think you could be me



I could be you



We could be thee



Maybe all three



Wearing your twiggy clothes



With an upturned nose



With a sexy...

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The dead want to talk to me about stupid things.
like, does ‘Chick-Fi-A’ still make spicy sandwiches?

I thought the dead could walk through walls
and see our thoughts;
apparently they are all in a dark room
watching old documentaries,
trying...

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Mister Miss

Mr. Miss is a man indeed.
He can't catch a cold let alone cold feet.
He lives in a house with his mother and sister.
Mom is named Louise Mister and his little sister is Missy miss...

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For turning my eyes into shallow Pacific blues,
because nobody likes Chocolate. 

For transforming the freckled clusterbomb on my face,
into baby skin smoothness!

Because freckles are humanity’s alleged worst enemy
and I refuse to allow my self-confidence to...

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She was an aspiring starlet, a real cutie patootie 
Folks were in awe of her natural beauty

She wanted to be a great Hollywood star
But she’s taken the surgery much too far

Her teeth have been fixed...

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Hourglass figures are for models and others who may be vain.
Dieting, Exercising, and Depriving myself of sweets would cause me too much pain.
Liposuction, Tummy Tucks - they need that Botox shot.
To find their Mr. Right...

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When I seen her, I knew I had to make her mine
She comes a family with a knack for design
She is put together so very well
She has been mine for 15 years, no one can...

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What has happened to women and girls of today
Once natural and organic
The plastic surgeons and cosmetic companies
And Beauty magazines have blown all that away.

False hair lashes and brows
Face lifts botox Bigger lips 
Liposuction off the...

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They want to be skin and bones with plastic wasters, 
They want to be stupid, they want to be famous, 
Fake, superficial and contagious, 
"She don't want your love, 
She wants your money, boy." 

Modern...

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More Than... Ever

My Angel I Love You more than ever
More than words and phrases that are clever
I Love You more than our amazing always
More than our amazing nights and days
I Love You more than an...

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At cock crow 
Lady and Mr. Y, turned seventy
They googled themselves;
The wind whistled past
And exposed the gooses back
They felt the wrinkles 
On their temple,
The rings around their eyes
And the tires around their waistline;
They threw caution...

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Those Pesky Typos

By Elton Camp

Only a second of inattention does it take
To make a funny or serious typing mistake

In English, a single letter or even a space
Can result in embarrassment or disgrace

A sign was painted...

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lips lust for more

luscious kisses drip

in mouthed desire


bosom invite cuddles

tits entice fondling

bust on the rise


belly composes rings

softens sweet union

goes with the flow


yet she is never content

judgement beckons

from society's norm


botox

boob job

liposuction


skewed grin 

chest distorted

body dysmorphic 


in...

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