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Thank You, Photoshop

For turning my eyes into shallow Pacific blues, because nobody likes Chocolate. For transforming the freckled clusterbomb on my face, into baby skin smoothness! Because freckles are humanity’s alleged worst enemy and I refuse to allow my self-confidence to stay Pro-Activ. Thank you, Photoshop for giving me that liposuction I ALWAYS wanted in less than 10 minutes! Working out is BENEATH me! And I’m too busy dating these "5 Guys". Thank you for bathing me in your Black & White Fountain of Youth! 60 is the used 25! I refuse attempts in removing this fallacy crawling under my lifted eye sockets. My wisdom wrinkles shall stay imploded under pretentious needle. Otherwise, I can’t continue to be fed flirtatious appetizers by horny sheeple and bi-curious copycats hocking hairballs at the sight of my airbrushed collagen lips while they dry hump my computer generated thighs. Their retinas grope my artificially inflated Grand Canyons which are really only peaked valleys. Yet, they won’t look at my defaults… So, I thank you Photoshop for being unable to crop my misery. © Drake J. Eszes "Dedicated to those who are unable to look within themselves." -D.J.E.

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Jennifer Cardona

Date: 9/12/2013 9:12:00 AM

"Working out is beneath me I'm to busy dating this "5 guys" This was really good

Poet Tacito
Date: 9/12/2013 9:45:00 AM

Hola Jennifer! Thank you so much for that. I'm glad you stopped by! =D

Heather Ober

Date: 7/23/2013 7:06:00 PM

Holy YES! This is clever and funny and snarky - the perfect commentary on today's society. Especially loved the word play. Another one to my faves!

Poet Tacito
Date: 7/23/2013 11:47:00 PM

I know, right? Society isn't doing any of us favors at all. Thank you so much, Heather!!! =D

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 7/20/2013 9:13:00 AM

haha : ) This is so funny but so true..I love to look my best but surely i don t like to look as im im someone im not..So i guess friends have to remain stucked with my pooh chocolate eyes..and poo chocolate auburnish hair : ). .I really believe true beauty is inside the heart and here amongst souperr friends i find plenty of it..For this i thankyou : ).Tnks for putting a smile on my face with your poem.

Poet Tacito
Date: 7/20/2013 9:17:00 AM

HAHAHAH Hilarious. Yes, beauty is on the inside always. And thank you for doing the same for me with your comments on this. I'm very grateful, Charmaine! =D

Poet Destroyer A

Date: 6/10/2013 9:36:00 AM

Drake, a nice little win, in the SKAT' contest... xox~ Always & Forever *LINDA

Poet Tacito
Date: 6/10/2013 9:40:00 AM

Hey there, Linda. Thanks very much for that! It's a great achievement and I'm very grateful. Thank you again for coming by here.

Sasha Maharaj

Date: 6/10/2013 1:31:00 AM

Well done :) love it. Congrats on the win :)

Poet Tacito
Date: 6/10/2013 6:00:00 AM

Howdy, Sasha! Thanks very much for that!

Monterey Sirak

Date: 6/9/2013 5:19:00 AM

Wonderful! Congrats on a well deserved win

Poet Tacito
Date: 6/9/2013 6:10:00 AM

Hi, Monterey! Thanks very much for that! :)

Mari Banks

Date: 6/8/2013 6:15:00 PM

I think I am in love with this poem!! You had me at "bi-curious copycats hocking hairballs at the sight of my airbrushed collagen lips while they dry hump my computer generated thighs." ROTFLMAO. m

Poet Tacito
Date: 6/8/2013 6:27:00 PM

Best. Comment. Today. Hi & thank you very much, Mari!!!! :)

Tim Ryerson

Date: 6/7/2013 2:05:00 PM

Um...I think I gotta try this Photo Shop thing...Absolutely hilarious and congrats - Tim

Poet Tacito
Date: 6/7/2013 2:09:00 PM

No, no you really don't. LOL Thanks so much, Tim!

Skat A

Date: 6/7/2013 12:46:00 PM

Drake, here's your winning line -So, I thank you Photoshop for being unable to crop my misery.- enough said! CONGRATS! SKAT

Poet Tacito
Date: 6/7/2013 1:26:00 PM

Hey Skat. Very, very cool to see! Thank you very much for the opportunity! This was fun!

Debbie Duncan

Date: 6/7/2013 11:52:00 AM

Too funny, but, oh so true, Sometimes I think I should conceal the dark circles, my sis and bro had freckles " redheads" Thanks for liking my Down In The Valley".

Poet Tacito
Date: 6/7/2013 11:56:00 AM

Ha. Thanks, Debbie! :) Don't conceal anything. Let it shine! ;) I'm glad you stopped by!

Timothy Hicks

Date: 5/16/2013 10:39:00 PM

There were times while reading this I literally laughed out loud... too busy dating these "5 guys"... burgers and fries, you're so clever! It's amazing to think of all those high gloss celebrities look just like everyone else... beneath all the make up. And for your information I'm covered in freckles (I always liked them because they made me look different from everyone else... lol). Your pen was destined to write in free-verse... your imagination just goes so well with it.

Poet Tacito
Date: 5/16/2013 11:49:00 PM

Ha! I remember reading this piece at an Open Mic and I said "5 Guys", half the room stared at me (probably the Vegans) and the other half were a mix of groans & loud laughter. It was a trippy moment. :) And YAY for the freckles! Awesome! Thanks so much, Tim!

Careyanna Adams

Date: 12/11/2011 10:13:00 AM

Oh, this I like. Isn't it odd, how all those gloss-faced beauties seem to lack pores. Thanks for this.

Poet Tacito
Date: 12/11/2011 1:41:00 PM

LOL (yes, I really did laugh out loud)!!! So well said. Damn. And thank YOU for that awesomely epic comment!

Lizzie Treetop

Date: 11/20/2011 5:09:00 PM

Oh how acerbic and brilliant! Oh dear there goes my breakfast again! You are challening my brain how awesome! LT

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 11/19/2011 8:31:00 PM

What a write! (my friend just loves photoshopping pics of me and her together. It's pretty stupid!)

Nola Perez

Date: 11/19/2011 1:48:00 PM

I loved this! Thank you for liking my Halloween poem. Nola

Jessica Woolum

Date: 11/10/2011 7:46:00 AM

I love this! I enjoyed reading all the discriptions. It's a sad truth that many people do feel this way. But you show the ridiculousness of the whole thing. Love this!

Poet Tacito
Date: 11/10/2011 9:24:00 AM

I did what I could here. :) I do thank you for coming this way, Jessica.

Kabuteng P.Ink K.

Date: 11/9/2011 12:57:00 AM

Very interesting piece, Drake-- I definitely enjoyed reading this and yup, how sad really how some people have become so superficial-- really cool way of tackling the subject-- that line about Pro-Activ was very cool btw ;)

Poet Tacito
Date: 11/10/2011 9:24:00 AM

Yes, quite sad indeed. LOL and thank you too. :)

Elizabeth Wesley

Date: 10/9/2011 10:56:00 PM

Looking in or out can be very difficult - maybe prescription rose colored glasses would help. I had lots of fun reading this Drake, your descriptions are way out!!! :)

Poet Tacito
Date: 10/10/2011 8:33:00 AM

Yes it can be. Ha, thank you! :)