Long Hard to tell Poems
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It's Friday! And it’s “Girls’ Night Out"! His favorite dinner and wine we shared!
We give each other a little bit space, at least, once every other week
Any given night, always a special treat, we may choose to cuddle instead
Whatever desires the other may have, each makes sure to prioritize
That’s the routine in our love nest; it’s just how we sail this boat
Dressed in stretched jeans; curves seemly more pronounced and I feel burning eyes upon me
Yes, I know that look so very well, but tonight, that can’t go down
To put him off, I attempt light conversation; to sort of change his unspoken
suggestion
I nonchalantly ask, “What game are you planning to watch, Love?"
With a silent, hope, that craving eyes would deflect
Deliberately, I avoid his intense stare, speaking loudly, a language I know too well
Too late! In just two steps he’s all over me; and I melt like butter in the sun
“Can’t you call? Say you’ll be a little late, hmm?” He whispers in my ear
“No, Love, the last time I did that, we fell asleep, remember?”
“Look, I’ll set the alarm, just one hour will do; I’m missing you already”.
Like a kid, he begins to pout and guilt raps at my heart’s door
Planting warm butterfly kisses the expanse of my neck
Murmuring low, words he knows I love to hear
And though I feign disinterest, persistent hands unrelenting
“Will you call and tell her? Will you, or I’ll call if you like?”
He may be unaware, though it’s hard to tell, as there are no secrets which I can maintain
In my mind I’ve already begun to disrobe him; my favorite dance flats cast aside
On the verge of giving in, I raise up my head to gaze those smoldering eyes
In that instant, I’m captured; cornered, again
His brilliant smile from lips so soft appears plastered on his chiseled face
Fully aware he’s won like so many times before
He picks up the phone, hits speed dial with one hand free;
The other is wrapped snugly 'round my waist as I admire his one track mind
“Hi Caitlin! Listen... …Yes, she’ll be late. Now, how'd you know?”
And her laughter rings throughout cyber space as she's made a prudent guess
“That’s fine, I just know!” She replied, still chuckling. “Ask her to call me before she leaves, will you?”
“Oh sure! Whatever you say, dear.”
~*~
For: Francine's "Whatever You Say, Dear" Contest
"HIGH TECH LYNCHING"
April 6, 2023, a dark and sad day in Tennessee history
Black men striped of their first amendment right to tell their story
The Declaration of Independence, states that "all men are created equal"
But the miscarriage of justice carried out in Nashville, quite illegal
Two young black Representatives expelled from the state house
Wrongfully discarded, unconstitutionally trashed, with many doubts
Simply because of the color of their skin
The perpetrators will never win
Black people in the south, still faced with remmnants of Jim Crow
They continuously want to constrain our voices, don't you know
Systemic racism is still alive and well
Brothers and Sisters open your eyes, because it's not that hard to tell
The act of expulsion, was a planned strategy
Nothing more than a senseless tragedy
From start to finish, this was all about race
Just a blatant power grab to put two uppity blacks in their place
The nation mourns for the loss souls in the Nashville legislature
Blinded by the darkness of corruption, with a revengeful nature
They rammed down our throats, a historical, unprecedented expulsion
Two black men politically lynched, for a house, decorum rules intrusion
Modern day slavery, still keeping us down
I am embarrassed to say that Memphis is my home town
Don't misconstrue, "Modern Day Slavery", as victimhood
We're not victims, just oppressed people, with our plight misunderstood
As black people, brought to this country on slave ships
As we continue to be mistreated, we harken back to those trips
Why are we, refused and denied our deserved respect
Maybe because when we reflect, our opinions are honest and direct
Pulaski County Tennessee, birth home of the Klu Klux Klan
To overcome southern disenfranchisement, voting is the plan
For us to neutralize that "Good Ole Boy" mentality
As a people, we must realize that it's more than a formality
For, far too long, we have been degraded and downtrodden
We refuse to be your foot stool any longer, we beg your pardon
Many people have lost their sense of civility
Engaging in bigotry and not taking responsibility
When some people present themselves as racists
Don't entertain the negative, just be an escapist
When some in society dismiss an education
They are easily persuaded with misinformation
Mother, oh how I love you. You
make me smile, when I am down. You make
all the grey skies turn blue. You make me soup when
I am sick. We have our special “mother daughter days” that
neither of us can share with anyone but us. You’ve helped me survive
in a house full of boys. You’ve helped me through the hard times that being a teenager
brings. And I’m sure that helpful hand won’t stop, Until it is unneeded. And I have a
feeling that will not be for a very long time. For I will always need your kind touch,
your loving kiss, your warm hug, and your gentle voice. I will always need your
inspiring stories of your life and the things you’ve done. Of your very own
spiritual journey. Of the friends you’ve made a long the way. Of the
many places you’ve been, and the people you’ve helped. Mom,
you are my best friend, my guardian angel, my comedian
when I need a laugh, my shoulder when I need to cry.
If there was only one person I could share my life
With, my experiences with, my every second
with, it would be you mom. I will always
turn to you for words of wisdom when
I am in need. I will always keep my
arms wide open, just waiting for
the next warm hug from you.
Mom I love you with all
my heart, and I hope
you never forget
it. You mean
the world
to me.
** So this was my attempt at making a heart, I know it's kind of hard to tell, but it's the best
I could do. **
Sleep eludes me, my thoughts engulf me...
The room is quiet....
I hear a branch outside my window, scratch the glass, in winter's wind
I cannot slumber, I cannot escape the waiting, I have no tears left to cry
Reflected shadows, dark silhouettes of trembling trees, hover over me
Oh God,... please take her now...
Is it early morn, or early evening? It is so hard to tell...
when day is night, and night is day,... each passing hour seems alike.
At last it seems this night that would never end,
is quickly giving away to morning
Restlessly, I turn to face the wall
In the faint light, I can barely see the flowered wallpaper
in pale pastels, ....sweet roses.......
I count them one by one, soft shades, a trace of the pink that they used to be
worn by the years, faded by the sunlight that comes in the afternoon light...
before the darkness filled the room....
I remember when she picked this cheery pattern...so bright with color
Another time, ..... an eternity ago,
It is loose at the seams, just a faint remnant of color....
Again, I turn my head to check on her.
The large poster bed, holds her like a small child
She looks lost among the covers.
I see the frailness, a delicate shell of the woman she used to be,
The bedside clock ticks steadily... winding down...hour by hour, minute by minute
I watch the movement of her chest as it barely rises, and falls
So shallow the breathing, it struggles and she endures
I thank God that she seems to be sleeping
And I pray that her dreams are happy ones
.......................................................................................................................................
Deal With Appeal
Wrote this while watching the news.
Already did have much appeal
Trying to come up with a deal;
After all bugs were worked out,
And beyond shadow of a doubt,
Are able to complete and seal.
Del is one of our best friends (1500 on 4/8/2017)
from Wichita, Kansas and was
usher at our wedding. He and
his wife are visiting us.
About Del we always do tease;
He seems so perfectly at ease;
His demeanor is to be relaxed;
Never bothered or ever taxed;
Ability continues to increase.
Found A Feeling
Saw several African children
on the news and wrote this
poem.
Saw their faces and found a feeling
Of much joy from floor to the ceiling;
Shiny bright teeth with great smile;
Were waiting to greet me for a while.
Never forgot first sight I had seen,
Wearing casual clothes and blue jean;
Others with clothes from native land
For them by God had been planned.
Everyone erupted with much emotion;
Filled with all their love and devotion;
Together they always peacefully play
And with God have another great day.
Had Hoped to Find
Started sorting and was hard to tell
Which one would be my favorite shell;
Did consistently, constantly, compare
Lying by beach shore here and there.
Were round and others oblong and odd
That had been made by our great God;
All of various colors and many designs;
Several with spiral and also curvy lines.
Through shells did separate and strain
And ocean waves played a sweet refrain
Asking me why I became a big creep;
God's precious shells trying to keep.
In each day mornings will always break
So I then said to myself for goodness sake
Will be best if lovely shells are left behind
For others who often had hoped to find.
Copyright © James Horn | Year Posted 2014
Think that what I will do is just add
newest poem I wrote to most recent
poem that is in my list. In that way,
message saying I have already written
my daily amount of poems will not
affect me. I can add date and time
I completed it to it.
I added the rest into one poem so
I can print them all up at the same
time to read Sunday 4/9/2017 at
3 PM at Poetry Revisited in Shallotte,
NC at Arbor Landing Retirement
Center.
James Serious Mysterious Horn
Retired Veteran and Poet
The morning sun creeps slowly from underneath the grey sky
Dancing merrily with the angels on high
while the trees listen carefully to the Gods will
And the birds converse harmoniously within
I kept walking along the path watching the day as it starts
I stood Faraway from human interaction seeking out natures ambitions
Suddenly I saw an object along the road carrying an awful heavy load
With a deep message carved out on its hard back
It is not a co-incident I can attest to that
It seems as if it is has been on a long journey
and had a message to deliver in a hurry
Further up the path a deer stood in the middle of the road
gazing at me as if it had something important to tell me
This is the third deer that crossed my path this week
abruptly walking out in front of me
I wonder what they want me to know.
I simultaneously contemplate this fact while careful examining
the message on the creatures close-packed back
I took some amazing picture and compare them with similar creature
but this one was very special it bears a message from Emperor
The color and carvings made me wonder
Gold and black with shades of brown
With distinctive images filtering all around
Every carving on its back has some human
and animal elements around each spot
The hands and fingers were clear and eyes
and nose are represented in small dots
with various symbolic answers strapped on its back
It stood quietly hiding its slender head
And pretending as if it was dead
Giving me the chance to scrutinize its back
Three human stood on each side of its shell
guarding some secret door on the upper floor
A woman wearing a long golden dress stands in the middle
with long golden hair and darkened face
its hard to tell if they originate from earth
or they came from space
An headless man with a bird's beak
wearing in a golden dress with black stripe running across his chest
Three women stand on the other side of the shell
attire in a golden dress but a dark shadow conceal their face
All around the turtle shell signs and symbols carved out in line
revealing the secret of our youth and exposing the human truth
Inspect the carving on the turtle's back and you will know all the facts.
hear the phrase all of the time,
‘It doesn’t fit the narrative,’
used in news, academia,
and in political missives,
a phrase that I find curious
since so many do seem to yell
that the narrative they’ve chosen
outweighs even the world itself.
Like Marx’s view on history,
and the old ‘progress’ fallacy,
this thought that we must have stages,
advance through them relentlessly,
but history won’t hold them up,
it doesn’t go by what they say,
there is no path man is bound to,
just crazy lurchings everyday.
Did not 2016 prove this?
The narrative was she would win,
but things didn’t turn out that way,
and folks went nuts, thought it a sin.
Screamed about it for four years,
it wasn’t supposed to happen, no!
Despite the fact, scanning the past,
that this is how things often go.
I think, perhaps, the first mistake
you see in the narrative crowd,
is simple overreduction,
to pair all human beings down.
We saw this in Collectivists,
and their misplaced faith in ‘the group,’
but others do this trick as well,
simplification hides the truth.
Humans are a chaos system,
even taken one at time,
sure, we do have our old routines,
but every so often you’ll find
we do something that makes no sense,
that no other man could predict,
that unseen burst of randomness,
is so often what makes us tick.
Expand that to the whole species,
and you see chaos written large,
chaos actors interacting,
I think that it's a stretch too far
for any human mind to grasp,
to think you could is a conceit,
too many factors change too fast
to be forseen reliably.
Add to that the physical world
is a chaos system as well,
and we’re all stuck living with it,
this makes it really hard to tell
what causes this, or changes that,
to our mind it seems randomness,
it’s plain to see that narrative
cannot encompass all of this.
Our brain simply can’t organize
or relate to something that vast,
we simplify to understand,
and there’s a great danger in that.
Some start to think the narrative
is objective reality,
and act as if denying that
is a troubling perfidy.
But when has the world ever cared
about the thoughts we apes create?
The world is not a narrative,
that is a fact we can’t escape...
CONCLUDES IN PART II.
We journey across the horizon to the little town where hearts meet and we watch the sun spread its light over the ocean
pulling everyone to the beach.
They were elated to mingle in the sun for the rain has gone leaving a special warmth on the. lawn and the visitors gather around with their picnic basket enjoying every moment of it. I have never seen so much smiles before, some were rolling in laughter on the grass, it is hard to tell what was going on in their head, but they all had a story to tell.
My soul journey across the sea looking for thee, I searched
High and low but you were nowhere to be found and my spirit began to frown. I heard that you were here but I could not tell where you were staying and the evening gets longer and your presence became stronger.
Look up in the sky and watch the planes as they fly by; there is music in the sky and melody fill the air spreading joy everywhere but the time is coming when destiny will change the tune and you will know the truth. When my soul speak, it will cause your heart to weep
Come and listen to the oracle of they journey across the country looking for what they could not understand and all the found was a man sitting in a broken van wearing a long robe and a broken crown but the miracle was at the side where love abide. .That was all they need to complete a decade old journey that has they roaming, country, village cities and town but now they are homeward bound and destiny have found the answer.
Everybody come and dine with me on the final leg of your journey, come and sing with me and touch my soul with kind words of old. It is the part of me that you cannot see that is driving the universe crazy, it is he part of me that you cannot touch that have them weeping behind the bus.
Daylight creeps like snake curled up behind the counter and he sits there with a glass of rum punch in his hand, hoping that someone would understand, the bartender is hastily cleaning the counter trying to get everything done before the morning comes alive but he sat there staring in space as if he didn’t care and so she reached out to him and that was where his life began he has finally found the perfect one.
Come and touch my soul and you will be made whole.
Tell me that its over, if it really was, it couldn’t hurt. Tell me why these tears keep
falling, though I’m tying to forget, though I’m trying to stay strong. I try to keep the
pain away, by filling myself again. You say they can only harm me, but it feels so good
right now. I cant keep going like this, but you don’t seem to want to save me. Its
getting the best of me, and I only want it to stop.
I don’t belong in this hate, in this pain. I want to go home, take me home. You say this
is it, but its only a house to me. I’m screaming now, take me home. I want to go, I need
to go. Why don’t you take me home? This cant be all there is.
I choke on the words, they stay in my throat. I close my eyes, I cant get them out. No
one seems to notice, if they do, then they don’t care. You’re only a spirit in the
attic, you cant help me now. Why did you leave? Why cant you make me better now? Please
tell me to drink my teas, to soothe the pain, to heal the scars. This train isn’t
passing.
I don’t belong in this hate, in this pain. I want to go home, take me home. You say this
is it, but its only a house to me. I’m screaming now, take me home. I want to go, I need
to go. Why don’t you take me home? This cant be all there is.
Its so cold, I’m damp from the rain. Its hard to tell it from the tears, it all just
feels the same. I crawl to bed, for a little safety, before I cry again. Trying to
sleep, rescue myself from me. The lights are off, im scared of the dark, I’m scared of
what’s out there. The creatures you created, the hate that brews in the clouds. Why am I
alone? Why are you stuck to the chains?
I don’t belong in this hate, in this pain. I want to go home, take me home. You say this
is it, but its only a house to me. I’m screaming now, take me home. I want to go, I need
to go. Why don’t you take me home? This cant be all there is.
They cant understand me, I think that’s just my way. But why didn’t you show me the
better ways, the things that could have changed my fate? I cant run away, even though
they don’t need me, but I want to leave, so desperately. I cant cut, and I can’t fake,
and I don’t want to cry. Take me home, that’s all I want. Just take me away, back to my
home.
Form:
Forget Michael Myers, the real Halloween Psycho's here
I'm the psycho that your favourite horror movie psycho fears
My pen tortures my pad until it bleeds
I write for those who get mad when I speak
My pen is more dangerous than Michaels knife
What makes you think you can kill me, I survived my suicidal nights
Like that time at 17 when I overdosed on tablets
Cried so many tears on my pillow, the weight broke the mattress
Looked at happiness like I wasn't supposed to have it
Don't know if I'll make it home
I travel my path alone
because these days it's hard to tell the difference between fake and real
I don't need Jesus to take the wheel
If you take offense to that, it's your fault not mine
I'm saying I'm strong enough to make it by myself
I'm done looking for my lost mind
I make mistakes and I'll take the blame
I could go to the strip club like a rapper and make it rain
But I'm tired of meaningless sex, I'd rather wait for real love
I'm finally at a place where I can accept a hug
That one thing I never got from my own dad
So that probably asks the question why am I so mad
Depression took me hostage, I've spent my whole life fighting
I'm Brock Lesnar, I'm Mayweather, I'm Mike Tyson
I may lose a few rounds, but I'll win the battle
Overcome every obstacle on my travels
Spend my days looking for inspiration and my nights writing
This isn't my best poem, but it'll be someone's favourite
You dress your scars up, I prefer to let the world see me naked
I manage to do that without sending nudes
Born alone, die alone, I'm not worried about any friends I lose
I've been back stabbed, betrayed and cheated on
My heart is where I'm speaking from
I was kicked while I was down, bullied for being different
Don't get too close, because I need the distance
You spend your time trying to cheat the system
People speak so much, but I'm not seeing wisdom
I'm going to be the difference
I write from my experiences and I thank those who take the time to read it
I try and inspire those who need it
My pen is by my side, I can't leave it
My life has been full of pain and sadness
I had to get this off my chest, but no apologies for my Halloween madness