Long Father daughter Poems
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An email written to eldest daughter
December 28th, 2019,
which unwittingly, magically, accidentally...
resurfaced while scrolling
thru outdated emails
and OpenOffice documents of mine
thee evening of February 20th, 2022.
The remaining lines
comprising reasonable poetic rhyme
sent to said offspring
more than two plus years ago
and dada feels grief no more, cuz time
heals all wounds.
Papa unexpectedly overtaken with woe
flashback shook me complex edifice
head, shoulder, knees in to toe
quietly processing silent film status quo
shant upended jollity
between when a little girl no
matter mine nonconformist
mien unconditionally accepted,
ye dear daughter(s) don't know
sudden onset of anguish ho... ho... ho
holiday cavorting accentuated as
charade, facade, masquerade fueling ego
particularly Santa with the Misses,
and her sharp faux claws
keeping warm while
temperature five below.
No matter most every detail
I accurately gauge to attest
your life bustling
chock full o' zest
withheld, no doubt emotions
smolder within your chest
and kudos to thee lovely offspring
(both) packed bags
and headed out west
twas honorable duty, though now...
papa feels like
an unwanted guest
thee survived, albeit psyche bruised,
undergoing the electric
kool aid acid test
laughter when playing
Mancala, Uno, Sorry, et cetera,
how dada predictably did jest
when table turned,
I (spoiler Craigslist curb alert)
willingly, lovingly, and blithely
lost desire to win quest
to dispose cards, game
pieces, and/or glass beads
invariably other occasions
ye long since left (as thee must)
me and mother with an empty nest.
Nothing more doth
Matthew Scott ask or desire
then to delight and bask
as well educated hire
swimmingly how thee
learned to acquire
confidence and multitasking,
while I trod thru much
psychological muck mire
oft times (like now)
experiencing financial straits dire,
linkedin to when only youngster fire
within me belly to joie de vivre
peter out and prematurely expire
and yours truly reckons nothing
can change the past aghast being
deprived a marshmallow
at long ago time sharing campfire
with shortcomings scalding,
killing, crimping relationship,
courtesy lack of income
rendered paternal bond disastrously dire
doth now conclude another poetic wire.
Sixteen and lonely,
a young bird,
has gone lame,
from her broken wings,
unable to fly the same.
Happy,
with the first one,
who shows her,
the attention,
she desperately needs.
But he soon binds her wings,
and the little bird,
no longer sings,
her savior,
has turned mean.
She tries flying away,
but her wings,
are still weak,
for she has stumbled,
over her own two feet.
She tries to be brave,
and unhappily stays,
she makes a nest,
and lays her eggs,
fledglings they had made.
One day her savior,
teaches her fledglings,
how to dive into,
a natural plant,
that brings him much joy.
The little bird,
does not like the plant,
she feels it,
will harm her fledglings,
and they wont learn to properly fly.
So the little bird decides to leave,
her nest becomes empty,
her fledglings,
have found,
their own two wings.
Her mate is mad,
he is destructive,
he is vengeful,
he attacks her,
making fun of her wounded wings.
The little bird,
that never sings,
finally finds,
her own voice,
and mends her wings.
She sings,
and flys,
without the plant,
she,
gets high.
While soaring,
I saw her reflection,
in the lake,
starring back at me,
a warrior, her scars had made.
I’m Linwood’s daughter
I still carry his last name
Like a badge of honor
Despite the purple pain
Knowing him was an honor
Despite all the hard truths
As a precious poet who ponders
Despite amethyst child abuse
But I prefer to be as a sifter
Letting the darkness fall away
For now he’s with Big Dipper
And his memory in me safe
I focus on the good things
I’m lucky to have this view
He taught me to denim dream
Plan execute and follow through
He wasn’t a shy man at all
His smile and laugh was sun
He had the stance and walk
Natural of a confident one
He wasn’t a tall man yet
Personality filled the room
He was a chemist the best
Ahead of his time like a bloom
Like a flower in the winter
He managed to grow anyway
Racism hard times didn’t hinder
Creative father at 18 born in May
He was naturally neon funny
Could lift your spirits high
He always earned his money
And carried hisself with pride
My dad was an optimistic hero
I could always talk to him too
As I look out the past’s window
I see his eyes in the mellow moon
I see him as an arch angel now
For he was a champion on earth
His smile was a cure for frown
His love was as holy as church
I am Linwood’s daughter
The words that slid across my lips
to linger on your ear
though well rehearsed
I feared the worst -
THESE ones you wouldn't hear
The same I love yous spilled from me
as I stood beside your bed
and as I cried
through half-closed eyes
you seemed to nod your head
A man of vast intelligence
and stimulating verse
you pardoned my
"simplicity"
preserving my self-worth
So splendid was your character
persuasion couldn't mar
Integrity was still to me
your greatest gift by far
A father of great sacrifice,
a husband kind and true
as mom recalled
she showed us all
how much she cared for you
The hands that toiled
on through the years
and never knew a rest
until your heart
refused its part
and followed you in death
You're not forgotten, daddy
your legacy remains:
To your adoration;
inspiration
I dedicate the same
I had to learn to be still - it was a hard discipline, for me.
Impatience is my curse, it’s the underbrush fuel of my anger.
Unanswered wishes invited trouble and hours of internal fuss.
Impatience was the sound of panic in an empty room - it was
emotionally stick-fighting with the ocean in an interior arena.
I’ve tamed the wild urgency, I pretend it’s heat that I sink with stillness
but I still have the neural itch to explode - as if I harbor an armed vigilante
who watches the world with a child’s wide eyed envy.
My step father was my angel in this - with his endless patience and
calm - spending tiring days like Roman coin to help me understand
that impatience doesn’t make anything happen. With his generous
help I tamed this unattractive flaw. I was born too human but he’s
helped me strive for the heavenly. Thank you Step (my name for him)
I love you - Happy Fathers day.
Such a little feisty baby
It’s a girl they say
Pushing away her mum from the very first day
Where is my Dad from the start
Daddies girl at heart.
Such a sweet little girl,singing dancing, laughing, jumping around
Such a joy of her sound
Growing up to be a girl
Follow in dads shadow
Life in a whirl
Teenage years with all its demands
Boys and work and all lives harms
Moving out to be with him
The nursing home a place of sin
My worry was for her care
To interfere or not a nightmare
Back home to mum and dad
No more reason to be sad
Off to Buddhism together we go
Finding our centre and mind control
Peace in our hearts a glow
A lifetime lesson we got to know
Dad leaves and breaks your heart
We were never destined to be apart
You have your life with another love now
Off to Scotland I did allow
Broke my heart in return
One of life’s lessons I did learn
Married now both we are
Distance is far to far
Never apart joined by our bond
Heart to heart, soul to soul, eternal, divine.
Nothing can part this special bond
Father daughter, special friend
Spiritually bonded to the end.
Dark hair Anemic skin Soft misty eyes
So young how could I know
T’was only on her good days
I was allowed by her bedside
In an ever quiet house
Shades drawn Kids told to hush No reason given
I vaguely remember relatives
Their silent grim faces Lined up taking turns
Down to the end of the hall
While I eyed in the corner
That tall off-limits piano No one ever played
Too young to understand
My ever pensive solemn uncle
Was dealing with becoming a widower
Losing the mother to his daughter
My twelve-year old cousin
Somehow she’d need to cope
Growing up in a grief filled home
Where laughter would never be heard
The blinds kept drawn
For death to linger ever present
AP: Honorable Mention 2020
Beloved,
with preposterous
persistence,
I still search
for your likeness.
Gravitating
toward every
handsome bald man,
I scan the light
that reflects
off their head,
like the globe of home.
I strive for
the sight of bushy,
frost seasoned eyebrows
and hazel eyes
defined with
laugh lines, and I
shape-shift them
to resemble yours.
I hunt for
hearty hands,
calloused and
unabashedly
bleeding from
the weed wacker's
counterattacks.
I hearken to a
Manhattan accent,
while recalling
the name of
your favorite
fruit, "our-ange."
My ears perk
at the pep of
baseball announcers,
the background
soundtrack of
your steady presence.
The scent of rum
comforts me like
your broad-chested hug.
Beloved,
another's
stubbly cheeks
lead me back to grief.
Unattainable
in this stand-in space,
is your love,
beloved.
That amiable
smile that delighted
an entire room
no longer blooms with
its fragrant welcome.
Nocturnal
is my fervent search,
without night vision.
Knuckles outstretch,
but palms clutch nothing.
Beloved, your love
is within
roaming shadows,
splattered upon
the pavement
of nightfall.
Glances of
expansive
remembrance thin,
vanishing
into fumbling
fabrications
and uncertainties.
Yet certainly you
are loved forever,
currently
unattainable
to behold.
4-11-2021
David means "beloved."
Dedicated to my dad
I am a Father
I am a father of a Daughter
Who is in the age of teen
You will say my worries are very correct
She may be my daughter
When she walks in roads
her mind has been polluted by posters
When she reads a journels
she may be disturbed by the photos
When she watch a channel
her thoughts may be diverted by the plays
As a father ,my worries are correct
Her school and environment may be good
But her way to school and scenes in roads?
Sex and lust is everywhere
None is having common sense and road sense
Kissing and embarrassing love is found common
There is an attacks
on our girl’s morality and conduct
Rise my dear Fathers against this evil
To protect our daughters from these evils
Good morning my Sweetheart
Although you’ve got nothing to gain
Your love is as pure as the imminent oncoming rain
Wipe sleep from your wakening eyes
And prepare for the oncoming day
With needles and diets and timetables
No respite nor no time to delay
From pains in your tummy
And bloods taken throughout the night
I wonder at all how you manage to love me in spite
Of the pains you go through
You’ve a heart brimming so full of love
No remorse nor self pity
You’re my Princess my Angel my Dove
Though life can be cruel
And at times it can seem so unfair
The tolls that we pay and the burdens oft’ too great to bear
I’d lay down my life
And all that I’ve left that’s worth giving
To grant you a wish and afford you
A life that’s worth living
For my little Princess …