Long Dig into Poems
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A magical chemical infatuation
to disregard the tradition
of natures connectivity and diversity
dragged to the will of its subjugation
to dig into the complex cells intimacy
its mass increments of the yields
killing off the birds and the insects
for the sake of crop conformity
in the unnatural fields
A perfectly poisonous promise
released in defusable clouds
through the early morning mists
chugged and pumped out grotesque deformity
in silent avenues of crop conformity
the deathly dew eliminates
all so ripe so well protected
in latent morbidity awaits
Layers by "half-life" lifeless inherited
in this chemists manufacturing of a chemical romance
the inorganic compounds of devastation
bound by an economical tourniquet
to plough again the blighted earth
split breakdown the biological integration
a quick fix to be persuaded
a million years of evolution
the symbiosis of the world in Gods hand
was not a patent so diligently as patiently perfected
or so insidiously infected in the land
Mechanized desert to produce the taste
a tasteless morsel of a savored remembrance
to its colour yet another substance added
organophosphates persistently digested
concentrations in environmental compartments
disarrange the circles tilt the balance
the enemy is natures necessity
needs be defeated
swap it over transmit a hell-bent malignancy
Collusion's by crude oil alchemy
improving on a profitable perimeter
this chemical romance of manufactured efficiency
O = HO - P - HO - NH - O - OH ! OH !
take a look at what marvelous science has made !
broad spectrum killer
needs be to murder off bio-diversity
and 5-enolpyruvylshikimate-3 phosphate synthase
is so much better
so much cleverer than natures ways
so taint the population with polluted fodders feed
killing off the birds and the bees
killing off the fish, the insects and the fungi
and killing off our babies
So perfectly formed
and so perfectly preserved
perfectly free of any blemish
all sitting on the billion shelves
of a million supermarkets
So perfectly wrapped
and so perfectly presented
the perfectly picture of health
and in its cells something so insidious
and the perfectly poisonous
is its promise
So perfectly formed
and so perfectly preserved
perfectly free of any blemish
all sitting on the billion shelves
of a million supermarkets
She storms into the room
there is fire in her eyes
and thunder in her step
rage rumbling reckless
She's livid
a live wire of fire
charged
She's on the move
To punish
Is it a rumor or reality?
He has explaining to do...
She rushes at him
Pounding on his chest
words pent up all day
rush out in deluge
drenching him
he tries to pin her hands down
to make her understand
to undo this "misunderstand"
but she pushes him
her pride scorching him
her eyes sparking
passion raging
~~~R*A*G*I*N*G~~~
He pushes her against the wall
pins her hands above her head
"Listen to me!
You got it all wrong!!!"
she pushes against him
breasts heaving
legs kicking
and he's inflamed
her passion burns him
combusts in his mind
and he crushes her with his body
she bites his lips
as they close over hers
he loses his grip
her fingernails dig into his bare chest
trails of red
Growling in pain
He forces her....
kicking and screaming...
down to the floor
Pins her again
"Listen! WOMAN!"
She looks up into his face
breathless
and he goes for her mouth again
Taking her lips into his mouth
sucking fiercely
his tongue tames
fierce...his need to possess
to claim
She fights to free her hands
and they are on his neck
Pulling him in...in
Her lips respond in like
his hand finds her hair
leverage...a grasp
he pulls to expose her neck
And he attacks
kisses...bites...His revenge
His innocence turned to intensity's indignation
she sighs...she moans...
the sounds goading him on
As he loses himself in her cleavage
licking up her perfume
His favorite scent...
sensuous sexy sweet
the storm is fever pitch
in a flash of lightning speed
He lies her bare
and thunders in the thighs
she opens for him...wide
eyes closed
she bites her lower lip
to muffle her cries
as he rides....rides
His victory ride of righteous pride
and she's left
breathless...spent
in a storm of tears
released...repentant
of her insane jealousy
the storm passes over
and in the stillness
he speaks...
his voice shattered...weak
in her presence now calm
meek
"Your anger is beautiful
your rage my relish...
but now...come,"
His voice a whisper
as he pulls her in to him
"Come into my arms
and know the truth....
You're my one and only
My Passion STORM
Is YOU....YOU
Serenity...is overrated."
We sat in a room.
A bedroom, a messy one.
One with a mixture of clothes, garbage and drugs scattered everywhere. There
was random writing on the walls, like grafitti, and the paint was chipping. We sat
mostly in silence, we knew what was going to happen that night. When he arrived
we got into the van and he introduced us to his stash.
We got to the highschool commons. It was a giant building with tall ceilings,
giant pillars, and big glass windows, and it had no supervision inside. Before
going inside we smoked some hash outside. There had to be at least 400
people there. The room had flashing lights, loud music, and teenage wreckage
everywhere. The people were forming a kind of mosh; their arms flinging and
they screamed to see if they could out-roar the music.
The effect was deafening. Nearly all the stash-ridden tables were smashed to
the floor, so we hurried to the only stnading one left. He dumped his stash on the
table.
The lights plus the music plus the emotion made you want to dig into the stash
and join the mosh. That's what we did, but we didn't join the mosh right away. We
sat around the table and watched the masacre, finding it overly amusing. We
laughed at mearly everything as the acid took it's effect. I finally got up to mosh.
Everything wanted your body in, and it had already stolen your voice, for you
couldn't hear yourself scream. Before I could get my feet off the ground, I couldn't
help but notice that there were people making out everywhere, as they moshed. I
laughed at them, but was jelous.
I started kissing someone, unsure of whether or not it was a guy or girl. We
stripped off our clothes until we were nearly naked, but then he/she backed away.
They rejoined the mosh.
I stood still, and the mosh parted before me leading me to the glass wall. I
walked, barefoot, to where it stood surprisingly clean. I took the object in my hand
and smashed the gleaming wall, screaming with the music. The crowd cheered
and roared until my ears were ringing and I was nearly deaf. I moshed into the
middle of the mosh and everyone jumped to my rhythm. I felt hundreds of eyes
watching me, so I closed my eyes and let my body go. He/she found me again,
and kissed me again, and the masacre disappeared. Eventually so did whoever I
was kissing.
I know that I am dreaming
But I am Lucid and in control
I know this place well
And that is why it perturbs me
The departing sun manages to scrape its final rays over the hills to the north
Earth’s finest beach transitions seamlessly,
Into the blood red sky to the east and west
The limbo I feel is very temporary
A gust of salty sea breeze whistles through my lungs and snaps the senses
So I turn my gaze south, and I know why
The walk begins, without purpose, or so it always seems
My toes dig into the sand, a fleeting sensation of cool comfort
I cut my feet on the unseen, but not unfelt
The twinge of pain is fleeting, for I am approaching my friend
The soft moist sand renders control
This is the domain of the remorseless
I should have found what I was looking for by now
The water has become to deep, so retreat I must
Now comes a choice, which way must I follow the shore?
A short debate, because there is only one destination.
The route should be unfamiliar because I have never been to this particular expanse
I follow the slowly receding tide towards a piece of driftwood
My heart starts to race
Excitement and guilt wage war within me
I alter my course, backing from the sea again
The sea that has led me again, without falter
Back on the dry, warm sand I now have a clear view
So I take a seat, a front row ticket
To the highest rated and most polarizing production
Of my own sub-conscious
In front of me lies, breached, a baby shark
Not enough water to allow escape
But just enough to allow it to survive, for now
The dolphin’s fate rests with me, I am its final judgement
This is why I find myself here every so often
Playing the role of that which I so resent in my conscious
There is no debate
What the poor creature has done or not done
After a period of staring blankly at the suffocating animal
And watching the water slowly drain out of reach of its lungs
The time has come to choose
Life or Death
Neither makes me feel much of anything
I stand over what will become, if I let it, one of the kings of the sea
I stare into its cold, helpless eyes
But they are not cold and helpless
They are piercing and brilliant
Emerald green in the shadow, light amber in the light
They are that girls eyes
I had watched the lights close on those eyes once before.
I don't think about you in everything I do like I used to.
But a part of me still holds on one year later.
With memory of glassy eyes on top of the parking garage
I laid down in your lap, looking up and feeling the seatbelt dig into my back.
I didn't care, because your hands were holding me and tears were melting down from your face meeting my messy hair.
I felt it though.
Digging further in.
Bruising pressure.
Imprinting in my skin.
I ignored it as you asked me to stay.
I ignored it as you told me things would change.
I ignored it as you said you had never felt this way.
I was ready in myself.
I could've jumped that night and been at peace,
And you were almost going to let me.
But then you begged and pulled and pleaded, not wanting me to go.
How selfish of you
Acting as if you loved me
Pretending and putting on this show
I came back for you again
History repeats itself, haven't you heard?
...I should have jumped that night.
You were poison and
By now
By now I should have learned
One month went by
And we ended up at that same very spot
Overlooking city lights
You held my hand all the way to the edge
My toes curled, gripping onto what balance I had left
Now you say you're sorry
But you told me I was safe
Lies lap around your lips
You're the one who pushed me to this grave.
You try to apologize
Swearing you're going to make things right
But you can't take back the water That fell like glaciers from my eyes
You can't take back the whispers
All those talks late at night
...You can't take back those words That slithered from your tongue
That tempted and persuaded
Braided the rope from which I hung
And you cannot take back those letters
Because I set them all on fire
I watched them go up in flames
But darling, the words you wrote,
They're still burning in my brain
When I hear your name in passing
At first my chest tightens up
My face looks flushed
And my palms get sweaty
My stomach is in a knot
And my heart gets heavy
I don't know when I'll finally be able to go a day
Without you crossing my mind
I spend my life in the fires that burn but do not consume
And even though you sent me through hell
I hope you're getting through this better than I am...
I hope you're doing well.
You dig into my skin with your claws of distrustful disdain
Why don’t you welcome the Healing rain?
I promise that it will wash away the troublesome pain
That bullies you to the extreme – try, darling, try to remain sane,
Yet, I still feel for you…I have been driven insane
By the fact that I have been left behind…
I was that one insecure, sad child…
Don’t give me the cold shoulder…please don’t hurt me…I know I am not your kind
I am not your kind…but I am kind and mild…
I was once that dense, wild, immature child, carelessly doing whatever he wanted to do…
Until I met you…out of the blue, I knew you were lost and alone too…
How did I know you were coming down with the love flu?
We both wanted love to feel right…we wanted to be accepted…we wanted to be embraced with one-of-a-kind affection…
The passions, pounding pleasurably into our mind’s tranquil eye…we didn’t know our foolishness was another form of corruption…
Say goodbye to bliss that once said its vows to me...my heart is throbbing with endless fright...
Strife is knitting in every verse…I lost my train of thought, feeling worthless, but that’s nothing new…
My soul is crying out for your attention…there’s a hole in my contrite heart; though shame embraced me long ago, I’m still willing to search around for your other shoe…
Let’s face it – you're just another abominable sin, making me feel vulnerable and downcast…are you a sheep in wolf’s clothing? The truth is becoming black and white…
You were my black long hearse,
Running me over with your cold-blooded ignorance…
No one or anything in this wretched world ever felt much worse…baleful dilemmas start to rehearse (double doubts and abhorred avarice; but, nevertheless – there’s more grand land to explore)
I was twirling around in my sugar-coated trance…
I caught a glimpse at you, daydreaming relentlessly…you are a graceful gift, not a corrupt curse (that sends guilt into my numbed noggin… I’m no longer kissing the abyss; in other words, the sentiments of hopelessness doesn’t intimidate me anymore)
I am cursed...a heart like mine is broken...dark angel, sorrow is not the answer...so rehearse...our exquisite love oath…we welcome the halo-shaped sun…the dazzling, astonishing auras, surrounding your body, deflating and inflating like a kid’s red balloon…
Eons ago, near two flowing rivers in old China
Lived an old, white clothed man ninety-nine years of age
Who glared at two mountains he knew from his long-dead childhood
Who glared at the giants he always had dreams of
The first was a mist covered mountain, where all beasts were blind
With whispers of meaningless legends and theories
The second was a fiery mountain singing in passion
With trees and bushes with golden leaves, but no fruit
Both these mountains trapped the souls of the damned under the dirt
Both buried the light in the damp cyclical tomb
The souls were angels who defended their land from the night
Horsemen who guarded against the Prince of Darkness
The inner soul of light within the old man awakened
The youthful hoopoe bird within chirped for freedom
He began his work, to dig into the mountains themselves
He started to craft a path for all to travel
A wiser old man came up and saw the sweat raining down
And chuckled at the absurdity raining down
“Oh friend, you cannot remove one grey hair from the giants
How in heaven’s name can you crumble these mountains”
The foolish grey-haired man, singing and young in his caged heart
Said these words, roaring with his liberated mind
“My children shall tear the mountains by their blood-covered hand
My grandchildren shall destroy them with their chisels
My offspring will fight as unsleeping armies in the night
My offspring will never surrender their grand fight
The birds of the blue sky will peck the mountains piece by piece
The worms of earth will eat the fortress bit by bit”
These words reached the wise man’s inner heart beating with wonder
These words reached the sun and moon’s delicate bright souls
So the ships of light carried the message to the blue sky
The Infinite Father of Greatness and Lightness
The blue sky ripped apart the revolving grey clouds of might
The expanse of azure blue split all into two
Daylight shone in the highest firmament of dark violet
Daylight shone in the lowest crannies of Sheol
These two mountains vanished as if they were nothing at all
These two watchtowers crumbled in the gentle flames
Leaving no fortresses between the two flowing rivers
Leaving only an untouched garden, eons old
Alone on the trail, pushing daylight,
we two pull into a small arroyo to bed down.
Nigh unto exhaustion, hot food
transcends tired old bones and the smell of sweat,
but not enough for either one of us to volunteer.
The fire, more for company than for heat
soon plays its lonely desert song into night air.
We take out our stash and roll an old fashioned
lumpy cigarette, twisting the end just so,
to hold it together till lit.
Soon we’re hanging on cliff’s edge between
the real and unreal world of guided imagination.
The dreams of holy men in ancient tribes calling
shape shifters into mental matrimony,
waiting for the merge of brain and vision.
Beating ceremonial drums and asking for grace.
They soon dig into my old rusty past that hangs
some where on the fringe of past and present.
I’m riding fiery waves in the belly of the beast.
Back draft--- watch for back draft I thought.
Back draft !! That point where temperature raises
combustion to the point of a cyclonic draft of fire.
The beast feeds on oxygen, oxygen eaten so fast
it sucks the surrounding area clean of all air.
A lucky person caught thus would be incinerated.
One unlucky would slowly roast while suffocating.
Awaking abruptly, I forgot the dream. Just a dream.
The wind had settled, in fact there was deathly quiet.
Too quiet, but nothing was giving information.
So we saddled, and headed into Big Timber, the last leg.
Big Timber—a plethora of ash, alpine, and firs of all kinds.
Only the solid wall of granite ahead, separated them and
the helicopter waiting to take them back to base camp.
He felt a harsh feeling of being stalked but didn’t know why.
Besides, he still was apprehensive about the deathly stillness.
As they wound into the narrows he tasted the distinct smell.
Fire, it was very close. Back draft he thought. The warning !!
Thank God for the tiny clearing before the final opening.
He could see the funnel reaching tree tops, deafening all.
Moving behind the outcrop again, they started to retreat.
Suddenly the silence was almost as deafening as the wind.
Moving again from behind the rocks, they were astounded.
The tornado had sucked all the oxygen away from the fire.
It was out!!!!
© 22 Dec 2010 For Tirzah
Her eyes begin to sparkle
With joy from within
Pleasure only found from
Sharing the heart with a friend
Elation only known with
The whisper of intimacy baptized
In laughter, smiles, euphoria
Left on the heart who listens
Silently, to the roar of solitary
Gratification taken from the spirit
Who knows the sweetest blessings,
The greatest gift from God’s
Genius, His expressions of care.
Her wonder is alive on her grin
As she digs, plants and weeds
Clearing away debris from the past
Renewing the deep, dark earth
With fresh mulch and bits of protection
From the frost that still could pour over
The lives who have only just begun
As Spring light flavors the dirt
In rich, nutritious sunshine
Her heart is betrayed by the delicate
Growth, the bulbs poking their heads
Through the earth, reminding us all
That the life of the garden is nearly
Ready to spring into this season
With heady, fragrant gifts from
Our Creator, the One who knows us
The way the seasons know the plants
And rain down hope, faith and peace
Through the spiritual light lingering
On prayers and praise poured out from
Those who know the amazing, tantalizing
Charm of the tulips, daffodils and roses
The lupine, the delphinium and dahlia
The luscious love from a quiet, smooth
Poppy, a marigold, a lily or a pansy
All the ones who drench the earth
In persuasive blooms, delicately planned
To color the world in vibrant designs
Her spirit is soaring like the cardinal
Alive with the moments of preparation
Forming cool, dark holes for roots
To awaken to, dig into, forage for
The nourishment that will always bring
Peace like rain falling softly, soothing
Healing the mind of all its anxieties
Sighing like the winds through the branches
Of oak, birch and emerald pine trees
Laurels alive with arising ferns
Exhaling psalms that emerge from the
Caress of God’s breath falling gently
Over the garden where she dances
With flowers who only know her as
The grower, the one with the power
To make even the wildflowers bend
To her will, to her gift for gardening
With a love that is inspired by Him
Giver of the sunshine and the rainfall!
4/18/22
Am I smiling or accepting my sadness
Ignoring my pain or enjoying my madness
Am I not saying my words very clear
Maybe cause I have so many bullets in my ear
Let the blood flow out from my lips
Watch the hypnotising rhythm as the blood drips
From my grin the gore rains
Watch me laugh as I blow out my brains
My hands dig into my flesh
The stench smells so bitter and fresh
Ripping out my insides from me
Now my body and soul are both empty
I'm living in this timeless, mindless, self-blindness, conceded piece of ****
Watch me as I cut myself out of it
Searching my chest for a piece of me
Trying to find some humanity
Discovering I've always been heartless
It is beyond fathomless
Embrace the emotions that prove my existence
Clutch on to my suicidal persistence
Insanity can bring my comfort
Only seconds till my mind will convert
I’m living in this timeless, mindless, self-blindness, conceded piece of ****
Watch me as I cut myself out of it
Bite my lips so I taste my bitter sweet skin
I indulge in my sin
I will rip out my eyes and hold them facing my heart
I will watch myself fall apart
Prove to me that I am better off dead
Show me the beauty of dread
Let me hear the songs of anguish
I will make the light of day vanish
The void of my heart cradles my mind
A cold embrace from deep inside
Holding my hand through the road of lunacy
Guiding me to my new beautifully foul reality
To be lost is to be free
I'm lost in my mind, lost my sanity
Watch me break the remains of my body
The broken remains of me
I'm living in this timeless, mindless, self-blindness, conceded piece of ****
Watch me as I cut myself out of it
Watch as my hair bursts into flame
Observe my hands be eaten away from shame
Feel my legs as they crumble before me
Taste my exasperation sing from my bloody body
Watch my eyes roll back
Watch my body rot to black
Smell the malodorous presence that is my fading soul
Watch me smile as my body grows foul
Watch me smile, watch me burst with laughter
Watch me sing in my new body of ashes thereafter
Watch me dance in the breeze as my body fades away
Watch my hatred come back to bring the end of days