Fighting against external enemies is natural.
Isn't my fight against myself a Herculean task?
Desires and drives that decrease me into an animal
In my predicament, my consciousness is in a mask.
Values and valuations, like heroes and villains, fight
Benumbed by existential angst, I resign to the fate
My conflicts between power, peace, and patience reach their height.
The poles of physique and psyche pull off in a hate state.
Discord between desires and deceit, like lane dividers
Divert my inner equilibrium from its axis
Even thick kith and kin seem out of the blue outsiders.
There's no logic between my philosophies and praxis.
As though unbridled, my horse of existence runs trackless.
I run fight battles within and lose hapless and helpless.
When existential angst and doubt meet faith,
the saved hold on and cleave unto their God
through prayer; like Job's wife, apostates oft' saith
“Curse God and die!” when lightning strikes the rod:
consumed by the bolt's power, it loses
hope in the celestial Creator (leaven
of doubt leavens the saints; even Moses,
the Nile-cruising infant sent as from heaven
by Lights, could not invoke ten commandments
from the Mount to erase Israel's trespass
of lacking faith.). The old and new testaments
of antique, ancient time (when giv'n en masse)
reveal and offer for posterity
faith's assured reward and reality!
Dapple, broken rainbow upon my heart,
A light within and existential angst.
Once a spring breath that danced, now falls apart.
Dapple, broken rainbow upon my heart,
A moment of you captured in my art.
Hours move forth, you fade away, with much angst.
Dapple, broken rainbow upon my heart,
A light within and existential angst.
8/29/2022
Silence reigned….for the moment.
Nothing stirred in the garden.
No owl screeched.
No bird flew.
And inky darkness seemed to spread.
Even the moon
hid itself in shame.
A light breeze rose suddenly freezing all.
It rushed through the trees, wailing.
Still the man-God stood tall.
Existential angst wrinkled his face.
He felt anxiety, distress, foreboding.
The sins of humanity were on his shoulders.
Suddenly his weakness took the upper hand,
And he fell down to the ground.
Stressful sweat erupted on his forehead
And on his hands.
As was his habit he prayed.
And prayed. Yet the sweat continued
And turned to blood.
There were no friends to help him.
He was alone
And his last recognition was a kiss
From the lips of a traitor.
Do you betray the son of man with a kiss?
,
The age of social distancing, rife with existential angst and discontent.
People with cabin fever break quarantine, take to the streets to vent.
Date written: 07/16/2020
When existential angst tests faith, we hope
that in the new-risen day there's a God
from high above Who inspires us to cope,
tho' life strikes us as if we're lightning rods.
When existential angst tests faith, we pray
not for escape from life's woes, but for grace
and strength to show and manifest the Way,
the Truth, and the Light in reflective space.
When existential angst tests faith, we know
there's a God Who transcends all doubts and saves:
for it's ourselves we seek to overthrow,
since our nature spurns what Creation craves.
Doubt and angst, when by faith here examined,
now wilt and die from these lines imagined.
What is life's meaning?
What is the purpose in life?
I'm afraid humanities insatiable appetite for answers
Is creating existential angst in our lives
A brain hardwired on the savannas
Full of fear and aggression has become wise
This is the true devil in the workshop
It has nothing to do with an idle mind
In fact, an idle mind has time to contemplate
Time to gain perspective and unwind
The trouble is the burden of awareness
We are responsible - and aware of our impermanence - we all die
Those who use reason and logic
Pay a huge sacrificial price
Their ability and to stay calm in the moment
Is view by the masses as a cold - uncaring devise
We’ll continue down this path of fragility
Deflecting, distorting reality all the while
We sublimate collectively
Like sheep - following in complete denial
An awakening is imperative
We must learn to accept that which we can and can not control
A commitment to do better
And be dedicated to the process of letting go
Camouflaged Beauty
Before ‘essence comes existence’ existential beauty in the
Eye of the beholder and in the making when fragments disperse
And grimy misunderstanding of what life is about to become is
United in shards of stained glass mosaic cleaned from smudge
Total eclipse of the mind in which philosophy confuses Yang
Yin with effortless unchallenged order un-troublesome trifle
In polar complements I trust and with shadow comes light
Nothing is ugly as silver lining may well turn to gold at the
Dawn a rainbow bowing in grace and distinguished disguise
Icicles trigger change warm reactive blood flow of heart mind
Soul spirit and essence once existence is lived agentic retold
Gripped by the thorns the horns that threaten to pierce
Unblocked restrictions lighten the load and point to the journey
Irritating no doubt but sufficient and necessary to turn black
Sludge of melancholic depression into what it holds beyond
Existential angst to savour and befriend it for what it contains
28th December 2016
skinned green trees
bleeding ghosts
fallen leaves
inner disquiet
unchartered journeys
love is an ocean
arent we scapegoats
following the footsteps
of fermented purple grapes
prisoners of intoxicated embrace
existential angst retrospections
naked honest introspections
i am kissing the painted
red guitar from spruce
trees are speaking
aug 31 2016
3.51 pm
"Why must we suffer hardships and disease?"
we ask. Pain? Hunger? War? Adversity?
Death? Misery!?...Our best philosophy
cannot put these concerns to rest or ease.
Dysphoria, psychosis, pathologies
of the mind—subjects of psychology
that are all causes of man's malady:
the tragic end of these infirmities
is suicide! But we're not without hope
or God's compassion, as today we go
on, heal, survive, live, and thrive as we cope;
it's easy to lose hope when we are low
and in despair; but we are in God's scope,
too: this put your faith and trust in, and know.
Life is
a mountain of dreams,
a forest of fears,
a valley of emotions,
a maze of feelings,
a swamp of existential angst,
a volcano of hurt,
a field of happiness,
bouquets of caring,
a lake of calmness,
a tornado of chaos,
a whirlwind of relationships,
a waterfall of passion, and
an oceanfull of loving!!!