Estate Agent Poems


Premium MemberThe House

Why can't they fix the roof that is leaking onto me
How about the gutters full of holes for all to see
My windows no one can see out of,I wish a real estate agent could find me new buyers
When people ring my doorbell I cannot hear it because it doesn't work
But when I complain they say I am being a jerk
Robbers enjoy visiting me, the locks on the doors don't exist
The family for some reason blames me when I am unable to resist
The holes in the floors need fixing, something you better not ignore
I am sure the day will come when somebody will fall through, shaking me to my core
It would be nice if someone could take better care of me
If I was to be fixed up I might last for eternity
Categories: estate agent, fantasy, home,
Form: Rhyme

Daughter of Fortune

Daughter of fortune

She is the daughter of a woman who found passionate
love in Paris with an opera singer; now lives in her brother’s
house and knows, in the end, life is about a haven of romance
is going to last to the end of life.

The daughter loves a man of modest means; her love is boundless
he feels he has to find riches to be worthy of her love.
When she hears, her beau has gone to Klondike, she sets sail
to join him there, so her adventure begins.

I’m reading a novel by Isabel Allende, a book about a woman’s life, 
what a woman does, how a woman feels about love, more profound
than men perceive, who, in this novel, appear in the background.
Of men, who are fierce, yet, loving but need a woman’s care.

Clarification
I don’t know how the novel ends as I have only read half
the book; but it is not a Barbara Cartland trivia, where the secretary
of an estate agent, falls in love with the dentist who has his
practice on the second floor; it is a proper love story.
Categories: estate agent, best friend, blessing, giving,
Form: Blank verse


Ghostly

Ghostly 
I sold my house to a Moldavian family
the drawback was they had two small children
the house came with two ghosts
as everyone knows, only children and poets see ghosts.
The children were not afraid they even played
with my dearly departed dog, it was just doing its
the normal routine at night, securing every room at night;
a thing it used to do before the transition.
The problem started when the children told the parents
they claimed I had not told them and demand the house sale
rescinded.
The dog is not the problem when it realizes its nightly
inspection is not needed hiding objects behind the sofa
is no longer amusing it will fade away.
As for the mule, it is not going anywhere, the house
used to be a barn and the living room a stable.
It has been here 90 years, happily munching hay.
You can even smell it on rainy days odour after
a long day, pulling the plough.
The estate agent told me not to worry about a court case
involving ghosts is a lost cause.
I wouldn´t mind if the dog came to the flat startling rats
coming up from the sewer I have to flush several times? 
Before sitting down, and keep the lid firmly closed
with a heavy object on top.
Categories: estate agent, best friend, books, fantasy,
Form: Burlesque

Premium MemberSoot

Soot on LA highway signs. Billboard of you,
a real estate agent. All endeavor slides
toward inertia, extinction, forgetfulness.

It’s very tropical. Vegetation invades
the house unless constant inputs of joy
apply. The scientist in you feels the

great ape in you. The great ape feels
death growing wide. What about work?
I devote my present to my future existence.

In what way, in what sense
does one continue to resist. As
a dessicated cell, a mole of elements,

an ancient’s aura, a daguerreotype-like
shadow on a sidewalk, persistent headache,
paleolithic herbivore, potential energy, will.

Some wake up and pray, say thanks for
another day. Others curse their luck, stale breath,
the very thought of the rosy dawn makes them ill.

Lonely as leaf fall.
Nature knows no pity or self-pity
according to antiquity, the roof soot of the city.

I admire fire, tools and ore. Agriculture.
Cities, empire. Trading and taking (war).
Numbers, counting, writing. Libraries, discoveries, zero.

And the single-minded universe
that’s only a paper moon
without your love.
Categories: estate agent, city, death, future, house,
Form: Verse

Mid-Century Modern Dream

House hunting was a challenge
as the real estate agent drove me around,
I specified that mid-century modern 
was my dream and hoped to find it,
determined to be patient and not have a fit. 

At an open house I found what I wanted,
a sprawling beauty with ceiling to floor windows, 
with a giant sliding glass door that opened wide,
stepping outside into a plush garden,
before my eyes a lovely sight of a verdant arden.  

My parent's blonde furniture fits well
throughout the spacious and light rooms,
a white brick fireplace highlights the main room,
matching sunburst mirrors decorate the walls,
a Sputnik chandelier sports its space balls.

I am surrounded with my retro theme,
life in my dream home has come true,
living the past in the present is a treat,
as if time stood still in the golden days,
reminding me of life and its easy ways.
Categories: estate agent, dream,
Form: Rhyme


Acronym of Addiction

Adhesive seems to screen,
like a cage I found my being,
Imprisoned you!
Either intimidation or empowerment it slain,
Land in towns,...fence all over queen,
with one tree surrounded by forest,
Equiping personality negatively or positively in mess,
Stimulant to nerves,...shadow of tense, 
Controller reasoning with thief of decisiveness,
Troublesetter good works fulfilled,
All on a pace,Yearning it boosts,
Holding key of routes, 
Ladder of a wretched man,
Staircase to dreamers fan,
Dwellers in ghetto and slum,
Their Landlord,...Estate agent to tennants in a bungalow,
Serve as a crown made from amethyst,....and crown from hollow, 
Defined with fear or enthusiasm,
Anxiety pinned to hope,hatred about scope,
Solidified by ground of pressure and disclosure,
Reliefs a contrite spirit,
Distuction underlying a smiling realist,
Every moment nailed to counters, 
Figures outcomes converse, 
Planet manipulated by force of attraction,
Born out from a mustard pest,
The overwhelming acronym of ADDICTION!
Categories: estate agent, addiction,
Form: Dramatic Verse

Squirrel Real Estate

Squirrel agent showed him thousands of trees
this particular client being very picky
how about this one she'd plead
no he'd say not enough leaves

She'd say this one is nice but he'd disagree
saying too many squirrels means no privacy
after weeks of driving around they got into a rut
basically the squirrel agent about to give up

As a last resort she showed him a human beings attic
thinking this will teach him not to give me anymore static
but her client loved it and moved in with his nuts
living there till the humans evicted him with their mutts

He finally said I'll have to stop being so picky
moving into a cell tower right by the city
saying this is great I now have a new home
picking up great signals on his cell phone.

And as for the real estate agent she turned in all her business cards
going back to her old job as a squirrel crossing guard.


10-25-17
Categories: estate agent, animal, humor,
Form: Light Verse

Draining Experience - Flying the Coop Contest

Been eating medusa dates
Lovely fat juicy ones
I ate and ate them
Oh my they were so good
Why does my stomach feel *****
I thought the next day 
Oh my! to the bathroom I ran
and sat , and sat and sat
Dare not leave, was in a quandary
The estate agent was calling in an hour
My mam needed a price for probate.
The smell lingered , Febreze Air, or the external fan
Couldn't remove it.
The doorbell went, I went out the back door
Left my mam to apologise, to this day
I do not eat fresh dates. 
Beware of things fat and squiggy nice to eat 
Can lead you into a foul smelly time.

Penned 29 April 2015
Categories: estate agent, truth,
Form: Free verse

Poor Salesmanship

An estate agent from the Forest of Dean
Was known to be terribly mean
His clothes they would reek
As he'd worn them all week
But he was doing his bit to be green
Categories: estate agent, humor, humorous, silly,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberYou Go Girl

I know of this gal who's started a diet
I wish her much luck in her quest
Can't mention her name, she'd be upset
But accepts this challenge with zest

We know how difficult diets can be
One of the hardest things to accomplish
But this gal can do it if anyone can
Her ultimate success is my wish

Once a successful real estate agent
Accomplishing that a great feat
So losing some pounds should be a snap
A lead pipe cinch to complete

There are many others in need a boost
To start them on their way to skinny
An incentive helps to spur them on
So once more they can wear a size “mini”

Good luck to her and all you others
Who've grabbed the bull by the horns
The prize at the end is so darn rewarding
To wake up feeling great every morn!


© Jack Ellison 2013
Categories: estate agent, dedication, health,
Form: Quatrain

I See Beyond - - Contest Poem

I See Beyond…

I see beyond the damp, moldy roof shingling
I pay no mind to the stray cats on the stoop mingling
For I know that behind that chipped painted door 
Is a not just cape cod cottage but much more

A young girl in a dress runs through the kitchen tearing her stocking
Mother yells from the window on the back patio
She holds her husbands hand as they watch the seagulls flocking
Their daughter joins to wish them farewell as they go

I see beyond the weathered exterior and picture what could be
A home filled with love and children, my wife and me
I say, “I’ll take it!” to the real estate agent who stands in awe
Apparently he and others were not able to see beyond
Categories: estate agent, imagination,
Form: I do not know?

21st Century Nursery Rhymes # 165

Robert Barnes, fellow fine,
Can you shoe this horse of mine?
No, good sir, that I can’t,
Why ever not, fellow fine?
Primarily because I’m an estate agent called Mike
But mainly because that’s a push bike
Categories: estate agent, funny
Form: I do not know?
Get a Premium Membership
Get more exposure for your poetry and more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry

Member Area

My Admin
Profile and Settings
Edit My Poems
Edit My Quotes
Edit My Short Stories
Edit My Articles
My Comments Inboxes
My Comments Outboxes
Soup Mail
Poetry Contests
Contest Results/Status
Followers
Poems of Poets I Follow
Friend Builder

Soup Social

Poetry Forum
New/Upcoming Features
The Wall
Soup Facebook Page
Who is Online
Link to Us

Member Poems

Poems - Top 100 New
Poems - Top 100 All-Time
Poems - Best
Poems - by Topic
Poems - New (All)
Poems - New (PM)
Poems - New by Poet
Poems - Read
Poems - Unread

Member Poets

Poets - Best New
Poets - New
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems Recent
Poets - Top 100 Community
Poets - Top 100 Contest

Famous Poems

Famous Poems - African American
Famous Poems - Best
Famous Poems - Classical
Famous Poems - English
Famous Poems - Haiku
Famous Poems - Love
Famous Poems - Short
Famous Poems - Top 100

Famous Poets

Famous Poets - Living
Famous Poets - Most Popular
Famous Poets - Top 100
Famous Poets - Best
Famous Poets - Women
Famous Poets - African American
Famous Poets - Beat
Famous Poets - Cinquain
Famous Poets - Classical
Famous Poets - English
Famous Poets - Haiku
Famous Poets - Hindi
Famous Poets - Jewish
Famous Poets - Love
Famous Poets - Metaphysical
Famous Poets - Modern
Famous Poets - Punjabi
Famous Poets - Romantic
Famous Poets - Spanish
Famous Poets - Suicidal
Famous Poets - Urdu
Famous Poets - War

Poetry Resources

Anagrams
Bible
Book Store
Character Counter
Cliché Finder
Poetry Clichés
Common Words
Copyright Information
Grammar
Grammar Checker
Homonym
Homophones
How to Write a Poem
Lyrics
Love Poem Generator
New Poetic Forms
Plagiarism Checker
Poetics
Poetry Art
Publishing
Random Word Generator
Spell Checker
Store
What is Good Poetry?
Word Counter