Many things are such, side by side you could say
Two things in one space at the same time
Aiming for the same end, perhaps couples are so
One with the other, as one to face the world
Two views, abilities a compliment of pair
When they explained it is how I saw this word
Not as treatment but as challenge, two against the one
But I was wrong, it is mine she said to fight and win
You can have a part in this play but not a lead said she
So there it was, my role defined, no longer did the word have sense
Until we heard the reason, the reason of this word, then sense it made
A two fold thing, to fight the spread, to fix the ill
And so we saw this word applied, watched day by day
And slowly died, away the hopes, away the win
A losing fight, there was no challenge to this end
Soon came the loss, sallow, aged, one thing seeming
To undo the other, to reverse the good
And from the side I sat and saw, no leading part
Nor side by side, fight had left, so instead
We paired in an enclosed space, the word was wrong
They should have used indignity
2013
Hatred is given respect is gained
I will never trust you the same
The bond I gave to you was given to me
Because I would have never betrayed you
I was never given the chance to explain what took place
You just gave me a dark face as though you wanted
To take my soul and break it rather then talk out
The unexplained pain you chose to speak dirt on
My name
Knowing we would end up one day in a enclosed space because of certain ties we can’t erase you should
Have spoke with o me it would have turned out different
I had respect for you know hatred has risen
Craving air and freedom
Losing my mind in the enclosed space
Allowing darkness to numb away the anxiety
Undeniable sadness and fear
Slowly seeping into my mind
Tear ducts filling up
Entrenched by my own stupidity
Rethinking my choice of path
Praying to be heard and saved
Having to give up the darkness
Or face this fear
Believing that only my faith in God
Is worth this journey
Amen.
A poet's reading another poet is like
a smoking room at the airport:
an enclosed space,
happy non-smokers behind glass walls,
the poet's thoughts,
as strong as Cuban cigars,
coming through
bluish twists of the another poet's fantasy,
as sweet as Virginia*,
a boarding announcement,
a new tobacco smelling meeting
in another airport’s smoking room.
* A tobacco's brand.
I wonder how I’d feel from day to day
If I knew not prime numbers and their play
If I’d never heard of “e” and “pi”
And still believed that God lived in the sky
Even though I’ve not done maths for years
I fall into brown studies next to squares
Ellipses please me with their enclosed space
Sequential numbers tilt my mind to grace.
Calculus is nonsense in its way
Where nothing re-appears to our dismay
It comes and goes like waves do on the beach
Where men would stand up on a box to preach.
Ah,shall I never know my other life
Where to the grace of words I would be wife?
I wonder how I’d feel from day to day
If I knew not prime numbers and their play
If I’d never heard of “e” and “pi”
And still believed that God lived in the sky
Even though I’ve not done maths for years
I fall into brown studies next to squares
Ellipses please me with their enclosed space
Sequential numbers tilt my mind to grace.
Calculus is nonsense in its way
Where nothing re-appears to our dismay
It comes and goes like waves do on the beach
Where men would stand up on a box to preach.
Ah,shall I never know my other life
Where to the grace of words I would be wife?
O mother, take me there, where I find the gratifying grace,
Take me there, where I dwell in bliss,
Take me there, where I ramble in rapturous joy,
Take me to that miraculous planet and nurture me,
O mother, take me there, where I find the tantalizing nothingness,
Take me there, in to the surrealistic world and let me ponder over the nature’s allegories,
Take me to this exuberant excursion,
O mother, I have become claustrophobic, I cannot live in this enclosed space,
Take me to the infinity where I have no confinity,
Take me through the valleys of sunshine and glory,
O mother, Let me live the eternal love,
Let me smell the soil,
Let me hear the choirs of sea,
Let me be an epicurean,
Let me squelch and tread on the planet,
Let me see the picturesque of nature,
Let me lay my body on the roots of heaven,
Let me dandle on your knees,
Let me construe the dappled sky,
Let me live and leave,
O mother, instigate your benign impulsion,
I long to see you and the world,
I want to be resurrected,
O mother, I loved you before I knew, I believed in you before I knew.
I been seeing my life through a cloudy veil.
Although it was my fault, my own sight I did curtail.
I believed in going with the flow, how could I fail?
Until my soul I taxed with a enormous bill of sale.
Hesitation became a crutch that I demurely hid behind.
Disillusionment concealed from my unconscious mind.
Instincts I ignored, to my ego, that was unjustly unkind.
Creating a hazy web of sorts internally, once all combined.
I lifted the veil and my vision is suddenly crystal clear.
Insight of self, promises an astronomical year.
Finally squelching the doubts whispering in my ear.
Thinking positively, I make a leap in my career.
Independence is now something I truly embrace.
Confidence is stronger, my fears I do solemnly face.
Life is now full of possibilities, no longer an enclosed space.
Lifting that veil, I can now contentedly say, I found my place!
Cecilia Macfarlane
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