Chomps Poems | Examples

List of Member Poems

Premium Member GINGERBREAD EXODUS

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The oven door swung wide,
a blast of cinnamon and fear.
Not for me, not this time,
I was already halfway down the counter,
a sugared leg pumping,
gumdrop buttons bouncing.

Behind me, the screams,
high-pitched, dissolving in the heat.
"He's getting away! Stop him!"
But the rolling pin was too slow,
the spatula a clumsy threat.

We were tired of being eaten.
Tired of the gleeful chomps,
the dunking in lukewarm milk,
the casual decapitations.

We fled, 
a sugary stampede,
across the checkered linoleum,
under the looming refrigerator,
a gingerbread exodus,
leaving a trail of crumbs and righteous indignation.

We scattered. 
Under the fridge, behind the toaster,
the dusty space behind the washer
plotting a new life,
free from the tyranny of frosting smiles
and the looming threat of milk.

Keep Looking

Early light
on an almost grass-green.

Appaloosa coated cat
chomps on a freshly caught sparrow.

One ruffled wing flies away
upon a brisk wind.

A perfect morning
for watching,
taking note,
for observing yourself
reacting.

Disgust and joy dance
in the same circle of light.
Keep looking...

soon
you may see
a low hanging squirrel
whisking its tail
behind your eyes

as if you were
a lens held to the eye
of a curious sun

or some yet greater
flame of life.

Premium Member An Apple a Day

An apple a day 
Keeps the doctor away.
With the meal finished
My daughter is still hungry
An hour later, anyway.
Reprimanded by her mother,
Acquiesced by her father,
She chomps away silently,
Juicy brick after juicy brick.
She is never, ever sick.


Premium Member Basho

few chomps from his words 
unfold all hues in cloudburst 
real photographer



Jan 29,2022 1.56pm

Premium Member Toms Bad Day

[I really must learn to read the contest’s rules
before writing the damned poem...
What follows is not twelve lines!]


It was a good morning until
My face was shoved under the grill
With only six lives left within me
This charcoaled cat shot up the chimney

I fell from the roof and went splat
A whopping great weight squashed me flat
But that isn't all, there’s a hole in the wall 
That’s roughly the shape of a cat

I’m silent and so I can’t wail
I’ve got a rope tied to my tail
At least that dog wont hear me holler
The other end’s tied to his collar

Out, through the hole in the house
A tyrant the shape of a mouse
He struts right by showing no fear
And chomps on that sleeping dog’s ear

I’m running like mad... on the spot
I think maybe I’ve had me lot
The rope snaps and I make a dash
And crash into mountains of trash

I’m stuck here with bins for my bed 
And a fish skeleton on my head
It was a good morning until
Jerry went in for the kill

Premium Member She Is a Cereal Killer

She’s a cereal killer
She chomps the Wheaties into bits
She’s a cereal killer
But please let’s not have any fits.

She masticates harder than most
She’s a killer of breads
Does serious damage to cinnamon toast
She’s the one of whom nightmares dread.

She’s a cereal killer
All the way up and down the kitchen
Now that you’ve been warned,
Please stop your annoying b………………….


Cat Caught the Mouse

Cat caught the mouse in my head
no more scurrying around up the walls
for him
I feel him squirm and I hear the crunch
of his head being chewed on
His mousy tail hanging from the cats mouth
I have to lie down
as it chomps away
I quiver with the mouse
and squint my eyes like the cat
its jaw clenched
drooling between chomps

I think I must eat the cat
the cat that ate the mouse
I'm not sure I can
or where to start
but somehow
this is true

Premium Member Dental Doodad

There once was an old geezer named Bob
who loved to munch on corn on the cob.
But since he wore false teeth
kernels got underneath:
and so he'd turn them down with a sob.


Sitting on the can, he read an ad
touting a brand new fancy doodad: 
So he pulled up his pants
got some dental implants,
and chomps more corn than he ever had.

Premium Member November Rewards

Around bushes, trees and pathways, race two lively squirrels 
Scurrying speedily up and down playing games of tag together
Spreading its shaggy tail one would sit up tall by taking a halt
Prying off caps, happily chomps on healthy delicious acorns 

With flashy chirps a lively Scrub-Jay pair takes off from an oak branch
Swoops down taking sharp turns performing an animated vocal dance
Flying from branch to branch spreading gorgeous blue and gray wingspan
Supports propagation by harvesting and hiding seeds and acorns

Migrated dark eyed Juncos enhance the beauty with their ground-hops
Taking leaps, flit low in underbrush to relish tasty leaves and grass 
Lunging forward and hopping backward brown towhees tap dance
Pounce on foliage and berries by scratching their feet to feed on

Tosses of nutty, delightful acorns attract large turkey flocks
Roaming around scraping ground for food under leaf litter and lawns
Clucking and pecking they search and stroll the whole backyard
I watch the visitors with grateful heart filled with nature’s mystical calm

Premium Member Look What You Are Teaching Them

"I saw some road kill on my way over," she said.
She had a horse laugh. "Just a dumb raccoon," she added.
I leapt over the sink and slapped her, hard. 
Leaving my entire hand print on her cheek in pink.
Her prissy stuck-up lady face looked stunned.
She stood up, and ran off without any more incessant yapping.

My husband walked out of his man-cave just in time to
see her running flat out past the picture window, clutching her purse.
"Playing with the new neighbor?" He guessed.
I glared  at him. 
"The woman pushed her way in with a 'yoo hoo', She was not invited."

"She doesn't share your love for animals?" he guessed.
Oscar Opossum pushes open the cupboard doors under the sink, wanders out and chomps noisily from the dog bowl.
Sophie, our most spoiled cocker spaniel growls.
Reggie Raccoon runs over and slaps Sophie.

"Look what you are teaching them!"
My husband says to me, horrified.
"Reggie is a raccoon," I inform him. "She TAUGHT slapping to me!"
I doubt this nosy neighbor will be back,
Which is a perk because I truly and deeply
Like my woodland creatures much more than pushy humans.

Farewell To My Dog

silence when i open the door
silence when i close it again
no one to make a noisy fuss
no one to welcome me in
no one barks at the mailman
no one brings the little ball
no one chomps the squeaky toy 
but love still comes to memories call

An Ode To Little Debbie

Oh Goddess, Little Debbie,
Queen of all Saturated Fat,
Sometime of Swiss, which is called Roll,
Now of the delightful Court of Nutty Bars,
I respectfully esteem your Zebra Cakes,
I salute your Cosmic Brownies
And I kiss your empty boxes of Oatmeal Crème Pies.

It can’t be, Oh Goddess,
The tasty chomps of your Honey Buns,
Nor that of your delicious and calorie-laden Donut Sticks,
Which causes me now to wear plus sizes.
But since this is your respectful tribute, Oh Goddess,
It seems appropriate to me to proclaim
According to a greedy and overeating custom,
That I complete one roll of your Powdered Donuts.
Your face, Oh Goddess,
Is so adored that I placed a lovely tattoo
On each layer of my 4-layer belly,
Such as a memorial
Or the obsession
Or my adulation.
It is like the cow coming through chocolate-covered grass,
Yet a bit different,
For the grass is not chocolate-covered,
Only carpet and I am the cow.
Loving you, Oh Goddess,
I love all of your consequences;
But I imagine
That even if I did not love you
I would love the sweetness of even your crumbs,
And my fatness, shaped in the honor of all your snacks.

ALL HAIL LITTLE DEBBIE! :-)

Masked Man of Oomswarshcknullphillbelly

little town of Oomswarshcknullphillbelly                                             
here comes the masked man Groggyhelly                                           
this man who wears a filthy mask shaped like telly                              
he is the masked man of Oomswarshcknullphillbelly

he, who chomps on chocolate chips and eats flavored jelly                              
likes to jump on little bulls and rides a super heli                                   
who loves Miss Mikooshaw and hates Gingelly                              
Behold this masked man of Oomswarshcknullphillbelly

Premium Member No Tell Motel

There's a no tell motel
Just up the road a bit
It cherishes its secrets
Like a horse chomps on its bits

The rooms are small and squallid
With a queen size mattress strewn
Across the age worn carpet
That has stories to exhume

The walls have needed painting
Some twenty years or more
But dingy is as dingy does
The guests don't ask for more

And that wall mounted television
No antenna there for years
But movies still play on demand
They don't star Richard Gere

That old man at the counter
He's leering at some folks
But twenty's buys his silence
For all us respectable folks.

Premium Member Working Up To the Hallelujah Chorus

Whenever I feel the dirge
Moments, days that pass without hope
My pleasure begins to emerge
The moment I pick up the old fishing pole

So much negativity is purged
When the bait lady smiles at me
This special day I think I’ll splurge
Not one kind of bait, but three

Paths to the river and ocean diverge
A sense of glee follows me to the bridge
As onto the river banks I emerge
Below the emerald pine tree ridge

Grinning now, gone is the scourge 
As I cast my line, a manatee passes by
“Enjoy your swim, my friend,” I urge
And into the water my line does fly

The song in my heart finds its way to my lips
As I watch the bait and hook submerge
A redfish chomps, the pole swiftly dips
At one with nature, I converge 

Reeling in the fish, placing hands on her fins
The Hallelujah chorus begins!


*Entry for Frank's "What Turns You On?" contest

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