Best Upliftingold Poems


An Old Man Was Driving Down the Country Road ( Hilarious )

An old man was driving down the country road

Written By Dean Masciarelli

October 1, 2010 (11:55am)

An old man was driving 
down the country road

And while he was driving 

He noticed that there was a police 
officer up ahead
that was sitting on the side of the road

And he knew that he was going 
a little 
over the recommended speed 

And as he passed by 
the officer 
got right behind him

And then he followed 
him 
down the winding road 

And that’s when the old man could see something 
in his rear view mirror 
and he noticed that the officers head light was dead

So he did what any good citizen would do and  he flagged 
the officer down
just to let him know that his head light had gone dead

And when the officer got out of his car the old man told the officer
with a big smile on his face that he is only going to give him a warning
this time around because every now and then everyone deserves a 
good deed 

And that’s when the officer smiled and went to the front  
of his 
car just to see if the old man was just trying to pull his leg

And when the officer returned he told the old man that this was 
the first time
that he has ever had a citizen that had pulled him over instead

And they both laughed about it for a moment or two and 
the officer said thank you and then they both got back 
in there cars and they headed back down the country road


(This is a true story)


It just goes to show you that sometimes good deeds don't go unnoticed because they are appreciated.

Premium Member Footprints To Life

It is how we discovered our history and our primitive times
Also the evidence to a perpetrator of a crime
You can determine approximately 15% of the person's height
With the deep imprints, you can know the weight
Footprints have led to numerous myths and legends
It left proof that there was a beginning 
They start stops, turnarounds, circles, departures, and returns.
Tribulations in life suppose to make us learn
Together Jesus and I walk as true friends
Because now I don’t live with those old sins
See the shoes I wear, made me struggle with life’s load.
So for a while I limped or stumbled along the road
Sometimes we run away when we have nothing to say
But we have help there is no need to run away
As I’m judged from all my wrongs and my rights
That is a part of life so there is no need to get uptight
You are never too old to take your parents advice
So I take heed to it and never think twice
I do not need drama, plight, or strife
I always walk carefully in my footprints to life

Enjoy the Life You'Re Given!

poor Walter Jacobs, a wretched soul was he
one day he said he had enough, then hung himself from a tree!

the tree was old and brittle, its branches gloomy and dead,
which snapped like a fragile twig, as Walter fell on top of his head! 

from the tallest building in town, he decided to make a jump,
he landed on a construction scaffold, which made a loud..."KA-THUMP!!"

he grabbed an old revolver, one that he swiped from his mother,
the bullet passed through his empty skull, one ear and out the other!

he laid across some railroad tracks, silent as an unspeakable mime,
wouldn't you know that train had stopped, just in the nick of time!

a bottle of sleeping pills didn't do the trick!
he barfed like a volcano, they only made him sick!

he drove his car off a bridge, such a stupid plan he hatched,
he walked away unscathed, without a single scratch!

he set himself on fire, but the flames quickly died
all he lost were the hairs on his butt, which badly singed his pride!

one day Walter said to himself,..."life ain't so bad, what the heck!"
just then he tripped over his sleeping cat, and broke his freakin' neck!

a moral behind this writing? i knew you'd quickly ask!
no one said life was easy, each day's a difficult task!

death's beyond the horizon, time passes all too fast,
life's with us for only a moment, slow down and make it last!...


Rye Whiskey!

My Grandpa used to dance and sing,
Joy to my heart he always would bring;

Just a few bars, not the whole song,
Pretty soon I’d be singing along;

“Rye whiskey, rye whiskey” you’d hear us both say,
Or “Red River Valley”, if it was a good day;

All the old westerns, when I hear them I cry,
I don’t hear them often since Grandpa died;

No one sings “Old Faithful” no more,
It’s just an old song that people ignore;

He used to say “now that was art”,
I have to agree, I know them by heart;

I catch myself humming an old melody,
And I smile, hoping he’s thinking of me;

And to prove that I know it, I burst out in song,
And maybe in heaven, he’s singing along;

“If the ocean was whiskey and I was a duck,
I’d swim to the bottom and never come up”;

My Grandpa was so special you see,
And by having his songs, he lives on through me!

Color My World White

White
Snow, so beautiful and pure,
Clouds, fluffy and soft,
A candle burning in the night.
A newborn baby, crying his way into the world,
The final breath of an old man, as he passes into Summerland,
The calming sound of the ocean, as it breaks on the shore.
Vanilla ice cream, plain and simple, and yet so sweet,
100 year old wine, old and rich,
Delicious white chocolate melting in my mouth.
A swim in the pool, cold and exhilarating,
A relaxing vacation, surfing in the Bahamas,
That sense of being, after an hour of meditation.
White will clear your heart and soul and make you pure.

Premium Member Trailer Park Queen

WAFTING through the open window
A DULCET floral FRAGRANCE
Adds to the TRANQUILITY
Bubbles in her BLISSFUL bath dance

An old screen door creaks open
He approaches, WHISPERS, “My queen,
Your royal carriage awaits.”
She emerges and dons her jeans

“My lord,” she replies ELOQUENTLY,
A LILTING quality in her tone,
“’Tis our picnic basket you desire most."
She laughs, emits a subtle groan.

Indeed, the old farm horse and buggy
Are prepared for the couple's ride
Through spring fields in LAVENDER SPLENDOR
So they open the trailer door, step outside

Tenderly she reaches up, takes his hand
He gently pulls her onto the carriage
This lord and his loving queen know
True wealth is found in their marriage



*For Andrea's "Beautiful Words" challenge.


Grandpas Chair..

Grandpas Chair..



This is the place where I go to get away. 
No kids to yell at, silence I hear, I can think strait. 
Sometimes my grandsons comes and then wakes me up. 
Grandma worry’s about me falling asleep in the heat. 
So I have to hide my liquor bottles and such.

Everybody needs a place to rest. 
That old dusty chair has been my best.
Sometimes I just need a place to hide. 
My grandkids understand old grandpas chair. 
His place of silence,  his chair of pride.
© Jack Reed  Create an image from this poem.

Good Cheer

Coming over the mountain top is a
truck with painted brew ski on each side 
                     with a fella wearing a baseball 
                                 cap bringing good cheer and good 
                                          times to all who wish to particapate.

                  Meanwhile this fella has always got
                               an eagle eye out for old cars or trucks
                                        he can restore. Almost like a woman
see their related they both have fine
                                         curves just like a guitar.

                    After awhile the good cheer man anticipates
        what waits in the next town or if 
                                    he'll be a star for one of the bars so let 
us toast our beers and have some good old 
                            cheers for the man that brings our beers

Windfall

The vortex dropped as it crossed the lake
and lifted the water in its wake.
Stunned, we ran into the hall
and waited for the roof to fall.

How odd it was, we heard no sound,
as giant oaks crashed to the ground,
We heard no sound of breaking glass,
in merely seconds, it had passed.

In shock and awe, we crept outside,
and viewed the twister's homicide,
great trees were broken, snapped like sticks,
so much damage, done so quick.

The adjuster came and viewed the wreck,
and then he started writing checks.
He gave us more for our old car
than we had even bought it for.

He gave us money for junk in the yard,
that we had been ready to discard.
We fixed the roof, paid the yard guys,
and had money left over to our surprise.

We got a new car, the most beautiful 'Vette,
and managed to pay off some of our debt.
Our car note is less than the old one was,
this tragedy was a gift from above.

Both figuratively and literally, it was a windfall
and we can only stand enthralled,
So it's true all clouds have a silver lining,
and God's love is true, in darkness shining.

©Danielle White

The Waves

Do you hear those waves crashing on the shore? 
You might say someone was slamming at your door. 

Oh, what I would give to ride those waves so high,
And never again to the shore draw nigh.

I would give money or even fame,
For a chance of those waves to tame.

I hear them crashing on the shore,
And it is those waves that I long for.

Soon that day will come when I will try my best,
To lie in the trough and rise with the crest.

When that crest pushes into the sky,
I will most nearly be able to fly.

I will ride the waves out to sea
The shore, I will no longer see. 

I will whip the tide with my hands,
And from great distances see many lands. 

For in the oceans I will stay,
Until I am called home for aye.

Yes, I would rather live and die in those waters of the world, 
Than to spend another second on dry soil. 

I would ask you to go with me on my quest among the fishes, 
However, I am sure you are too young and have had better wishes.

Therefore, the old man left on that mornings tide,
Whipping that water as if it were his child’s own hide.

The old man left never to return,
As he reached the horizon he gave the water one last churn.

Up he flew with the greatest of ease,
Then down he floated like a cool summer breeze.


That was the last I ever saw of the old man,
Nevertheless, as I grow older I am beginning to understand.

His thoughts were pure and true at heart I know.
It was his destiny to the sea he must go. 

I sometimes wonder where the old man could be,
But I do not worry for it is not in the sea. 

No my friends, he was called home long ago.
For it is with Jesus that he does now stroll.

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