Enjoy the Life You'Re Given!

poor Walter Jacobs, a wretched soul was he
one day he said he had enough, then hung himself from a tree!

the tree was old and brittle, its branches gloomy and dead,
which snapped like a fragile twig, as Walter fell on top of his head! 

from the tallest building in town, he decided to make a jump,
he landed on a construction scaffold, which made a loud..."KA-THUMP!!"

he grabbed an old revolver, one that he swiped from his mother,
the bullet passed through his empty skull, one ear and out the other!

he laid across some railroad tracks, silent as an unspeakable mime,
wouldn't you know that train had stopped, just in the nick of time!

a bottle of sleeping pills didn't do the trick!
he barfed like a volcano, they only made him sick!

he drove his car off a bridge, such a stupid plan he hatched,
he walked away unscathed, without a single scratch!

he set himself on fire, but the flames quickly died
all he lost were the hairs on his butt, which badly singed his pride!

one day Walter said to himself,..."life ain't so bad, what the heck!"
just then he tripped over his sleeping cat, and broke his freakin' neck!

a moral behind this writing? i knew you'd quickly ask!
no one said life was easy, each day's a difficult task!

death's beyond the horizon, time passes all too fast,
life's with us for only a moment, slow down and make it last!...
Copyright © | Year Posted 2010

Poem

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A  Avatar
April 3, 2010 at 10:30 AM
JUST WANTED TO STOP BY AND WISH YOU A HAPPY EASTER
Suzadail Jr. Avatar
March 17, 2010 at 5:43 PM
Poor Walter. I heard he had a job as a rectum stretcher. He used to stretch them to 72 inches. You might ask what one would do with six foot as*holes. Well, you just re-elect them. Hope all is well. I enjoyed this one. Vince
A  Avatar
March 14, 2010 at 12:19 PM
AND INDEED I WILL MAKE IT LAST... I LOVE THIS POEM YOU GOT HERE... VERY FUNNY... POOR WALTER JACOB'S
Devonshire Avatar
February 27, 2010 at 9:01 AM
SOOO FUNNY, MILTON! Couldn't even do yourself in. Love this one! Every verse gave me a great laugh!!! Love, Carolyn -- So glad Dane Ann told me about this one!
Smith-Johnsen Avatar
February 27, 2010 at 3:30 AM
This is too funny! I am glad that, Milton, that I decided to start at the bottom of my favorite poets list. And I am not disappointed...it's fun to laugh this early in the morning. Smiles (Out Loud!) Dane Ann (Please read my blog "We're on the Countdown) and enter the End Line Word (new poetry form) contest
Byrne Avatar
February 23, 2010 at 7:58 PM
Great slap-stick reminds me of Charlie Chaplin!
Fringe Avatar
February 22, 2010 at 8:32 PM
Milton. Awww gad!!! Hilarious. Your writing is amazing. As a tribute, I tried to emulate you a little in a new one I just posted "Double your Pleasure". I really struggled with it. You're the king mac daddy. David
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