Best Knicks Poems
My bladder behaves through the night
Each morning my flow is just right....
But throughout the day
There is hell to pay
It's bursting; I cross my legs tight
WRITTEN BY JAN ALLISON
Ladies and gentlemen please feel free to join in, send me your limericks by soup mail or in your comment as I will add them to the poem
In order to keep all my friends
I refrain from doing the bends
No trips to the loo
I hold in my poo
And strap on a pair of depends!
WRITTEN BY T S POETRY
10/10/19
Super Girl she had buns of steel
Clark wanted to make them a meal
He played them like a flute
Until she let out a toot
Then he couldn’t seal the deal!
Written by Richard Lamoureux
Half an hour since her last patter-pitter,
and she’s facing the next bladder-splitter.
If she runs or she leaps,
something critical seeps,
and you’d better stand back if she titters.
Written by Nina Parmenter
While driving I often need to pee
When bathrooms are miles away from me
I step harder on the gas
hoping my urge will soon pass
While speeding towards the nearest tree
When out golfing and ready to tee
I sometimes feel a strong urge to pee
with no bathrooms near by
I throw my golf club high
while I run to find the nearest tree
written by Tania Kitchin
From dawn till two I’m on that loo
Black lace ‘n silk won’t see me through
Need porous panties
Huge knicks; no scanties
In need of help ~ what should I do?
Written by Ann Gilmor
When I go out I hate to drink too much
Because I'll have to go potty and such
On a day I don't care,
It's plastic underwear
Lace with thick liner, to catch water rush
Written By Alexis Y
I live in the city that never sleeps
Time square lights shine
While the sun creeps.
Homeless men rush to the big tin can
Of left over meals
Teens vamp through the night,
No sleeping pills.
My fellow citizens
Shop so late
Club stays open in Brooklyn
Way past eight.
Catch a ferry to Staten Island
Or a nice boat ride in Manhattan
A Broadway musical
Staring Jasmine and Aladdin.
A Yankees game in the Bronx
On a nice sunny day
Mr. Softie drives by
While all the kids play.
A booster on the street
Selling expensive bags for cheap
And Knock off shoes
While he watch out for police.
Knicks game at Madison square garden
Carmelo Anthony hits 30 points
A Rikers island bus
Releasing inmates from the joint.
New York City is my city,
The city everyone wants to meet.
It stays awake as the sun creeps
My city never sleeps.
*written for Verlena's Contest "EBONICS, Let's Do Some Slang"
SHAWTY,
Yir' boy fin' ta' told ya' bout some lessons in what the Man call Ebonics.
Cus' I gots' this!
Like the young fellow named Carmello on the New York Knicks,
and girrrrrl I got mo' slang in my verse than the words of them nerds
down at Hooked On Phon-ics
I TRIED TA' TOLD YA"LL...
I keeps my flows tight,
Fam ,
cus word is bond like James
and I ain't talkin' Rick James, RIIIGHT!
Ya' see, round cheer,
between Normandy and Western,
what we call this is a little "Twennie Twin Twin"
but round the way,
where you stay,
they just may call this a "Sinny Sin Sin!"
Yo, hold up baby girl...
Lemme ax you suh-um...
Who you be with?
cus Shawty, how you look,
is off the hook,
and Boo-Boo you is suh-um I can see me with with!
Yo Yo Yo! Wait! Hold up girrrl! Where you goin'?
'Sup honey child,
You know my favorite basketball player used to be Yao Ming!
Ya-Mean?
Get it Yao Ming?
Yaa-Mean!?!-----(crickets chirp-ing fir' certain)
Lady Queen, come on back to me!
Yo, my jokes may be stupid, but they clean,
B'sides, I coulda' been' said something idiotic like Idi Amin,
Yaa-Mean?
And the homey don't even play no basketball, ya dig?
Yes YESHall! ...
Better put that ON SOMETHIN'!
And you KNOW THIS!----(awww heck naw, Shawty dipped...)
Her satin pants and bra kept slipping
she was forever at them hauling
her knicks around her ankles
her face as red as bangles
as at them she kept on tugging
written 04/26/2015
Contest: Limerick sponsor Jan
On July first
There was a lockout
Players couldn't play
It almost knocked me out
Games got canceled so I couldn't see
The New York Knicks play on TV
But how did it happen?
Do you really know?
I will tell you everything
That you want to know
First it started with people getting greedy
That's why the deal is not 50-50
Its both the players and owners fault
It should have been 50-50
From the start
Never should have been 57-43
In favor of the players was chosen dumbly
But now there is a new CBA
BRI is 51-49 to this day
And now the season starts on Christmas day
Now you have heard what I have to say
It started on Christmas
That's checked off my wish list
Now it is a lot of fun
The NBA is not done
66 game season
That’s a reason
To give all you got
And to take the open shot
There were games on Christmas
You didn't want to miss this
I got to see the Knicks
Plus Carmelo's new kicks
There were a lot of cheers
Six days from New Years
New year of basketball
All teams will have to fall
It is all the same
It is not a new game
But no teams are locked in
For playoff contention
But who will get there?
30 teams are in the air
The sun is
shining red as it
descends from the heavens
Outside my window I
see its brilliant light
This city is
where the fate of
man is forged
This city is the hope
for humankind
The musical, theatrical, film
and poetic performances
Can leave one breathless
We have the NY Giants and Jets in football
The Mets and Yankees in baseball
The Knicks and Nets in basketball
In this city one
need never be bored
On the dark side
are desperate men
and women lying on the street and
combing the subways for food
We need to open our hearts
And New Yorkers do have hearts
The red sun is beginning
to set beneath the clouds
This magical city
comes alive at night
Its millions of inhabitants
form the backbone
Of this great - greater than ever
metoropolis
A tennis player loses
And they say he’s been upset.
Well, naturally, I understand
Upset is what he’d get.
This term is never utilized
In any other sport.
At least, I’ve never heard it
In the sporting-news report.
“The Yankees were upset tonight,”
Implies they were in tears.
“The Knicks were so upset, they sobbed
In consolation beers.”
You’d never hear The Giants
Or the Cowboys got upset,
Yet tennis players publicly
Get linked with their regret.
I wonder how this word, so sad,
Became the one they use.
Would tennis players rather
Be upset or just plain lose?
My first tricycle should have been built for two
My baby sister jumped on the back
Down through the woods we zoomed
Running into a tree, I scraped my knee
Across the handle bars she flew
My beautiful tricycle could not be fixed
The cuts and scrapes were only small knicks
We never rode a tricycle again
But me and my sister
Are forever best friends
it was Christmas Day
at Madison Square Garden
when Celtics played Knicks
Earl the Pearl Monroe played basketball
he played guard being five foot three tall
he had great moves on the court
was a businessman off court
in childhood best friend was Knicks fan
he played and he had the best plan
back then Calvin Murphy was I
then after losing don’t ask why
because Earl the Pearl was won again
later in life I finally win
3/18/2013
Chinese people everywhere
Are cheering for the Knicks.
They’re rooting for their favorite fan,
Who’s managed to transfix.
Of course, they want their team to score
But whether lose or win,
They’ll get the thrills they need
By chanting for their own J. Lin.
For Jeremy, a Harvard man,
Is living, breathing proof
A brainy Asian athlete
Isn’t anything to spoof.
I get the Chinese mindset
And I understand their pride;
Since folks like them in sports are few,
Their joy is justified.
It feels familiar, ‘cause I knew
That feeling, oh so rich,
When years ago, I got to see
A fellow landsman pitch.
His name was Sandy Koufax,
His religion one I share;
And every Jewish baseball fan
Of that was well aware.
When you’re in the minority,
It really feels so good
To celebrate a star who comes
From your part of the ‘hood.
Once a person goes to Castro likes Sports
Otherwise he is poorly served
When service is bad
One goes to other BBQ
when in other BBQ
One reminds Castro
When Castro is reminded
1 -Wanda Jackson sings
2 -Moore gains new convictions
3 -The Kiss go on the road again and I travel to Europe
Life becomes hectic
Back in Newark
Dave Muscatine give me a look/I reply back
Dave dance back/ I dance forward
We look at each other
Squirrels make mating noises
Me and Dave
Dave flashes twice and says 'I am planning a party Me Den and Don J you are invited,'
We look at each other
We try to see own sex
We are not able too
We turn suspicious about people
We see a New York Knicks game in an obnoxious manner
We get kicked out from the bar
We call Chuckhole
Chuckhole is doing what nobody else can do for him
Chuckhole gets mad
We see a BBQ
"We change our location
Opening soon"
-Castro-
We think we know what that means
But we don't,
Nobody knows Castro as Kevin Chang
the TV is on
He will never be back -Kev. Says
Dave weep convulsively
I jeer about them asinine personalities
1982- East Ward
The Knicks brought us all a delight
It proved NY sports fans were right
But with UFC
Where it should not be
We see that D.T.’s not too bright
They’re bargain basement bimbos, checkout chicks:
they know me, but I don’t recall their names.
“Good morning, sir!” Oh, no – the same old fix!
Unrecognizable, these dime-store dames!
Guess Karen? Sharon? Best not play those games.
Ignore her utterly? I wouldn’t dare.
Don’t get me wrong – I’m nobody’s Ving Rhames,
George Clooney neither. Pass me on the stair,
You’d hardly notice me. I’m barely there!
If I played Center for the New York Knicks,
or had the chutzpah of a Jesse James,
I’d understand it. Big in politics?
No. Humble teacher, me. I have no claims
to specialness. My somewhat boring aims
include (the sort of thing you, too, will share)
avoiding small embarrassments and shames,
to get through life unbuffeted by care.
Why hit with “Hello, Sir”? It isn’t fair!
But girls are all extensions, highlights, flicks,
and knowing this protects me from the flames!
I scrutinize her curls and bangs and licks,
and then I say, to cast away all blames,
and neutralize the misery that maims,
“It’s you!! I’ve always loved the tops you wear!
Are those new glasses? I adore those frames!”
(It works, if you apply a little flair!
And then the clincher.) “Have you changed your hair?”
Three, four, or six
Which one will fix
And even the eastern final score
Making sure
New York will advance
In the best of seven dance
No longer the higher seed
Knicks now need
To win away
For anyone to say
Bring on the west
Who they select as the best
Spurs or Thunder
Visitors no longer wonder
Were they going to blunder
Fumble
Turn humble
Tumble
Then crumble
Instead
‘They stole a win,’ skyscraper islanders said
Message sent
Time spent
Giving the impression
A ‘how did they do that’ confession
About simple mistakes messing
Quite a lesson
Playoffs are here
And so is the post-game cheer
Get near
Toast with beer
We are almost here
Champion is going to be crowned
Creating celebration all over their NBA town