Best Groomer Poems
My Pet Poems, WOODY
Not long after our heart-stealing beauty
Watson passed, Jim drove me off from
The breeder’s and I sat in the passenger seat
With a cocker, colored a light maize/vanilla,
Cupped in my palms on my lap, while we
Discussed what to name him. He was
Our peace, to be our joy after the pain.
Alert, turning his head to note our voices; and
More comforting, like nostalgic times past,
Like a loved sweater kept for Saturday’s, or
The splendid fedora my dad kept placed just so
Atop his Chinese cabinet.
We called him Woody. It fit. Happy pup,
One dog even Jim’s mom adored, as
She offered to dog-sit and bought him
A stuffed monkey that he took 5 years to
Tear up, with only the squeaking head left.
It was playing ball that Woody loved.
Not even to walking with us in the park without
Scouring all over baseball in-fields and outreaches
For any and all balls he could find, at times
Eagerly perplexed about how to
Fit two in his moth at one time, which was
Much easier with tennis balls than softballs, but
The geometry missed him, making
Him huff laughs, while he kept trying to fit them.
Cocker’s hair grows long and, then, we
Couldn’t afford a groomer, so I’d trim him myself.
Once when he was older, I nipped him.
There was blood and I wept with apologies, until,
I’ll never forget, I learned from him on that day
About forgiveness. For he seemed to say,
Licking my hand, “What’s wrong, momma?
No harm done.” He comforted me. Not I, him.
If ever, there were a case to be made
For God sending us
Some angels in the form of dogs,
Woody was one,
Bringing love, lessons, loyalty, and laughter
— as dogs will do it — dear boy. Miss you.
Play ball!
—————————————————————————————————
(c) sally Young eslinger 2021
Thanks be to God
As I rummage through the cabbage patch of general affairs,
I’m made aware of certain signs of cultural decline.
I see it written in the talon marks of chem-trails overhead,
Confirming all my pet conspiracy theories.
It’s rooted in the topsoil of a flat earth conviction.
It’s every suburban legend’s low hanging fruit.
It’s the latest mass shooting as a Tik-Tok challenge
Teasing gut brain muscle memories with algorithms of outrage.
It’s all flash, but no drive, just broad-spectrum rhetoric
Inducing Karenoia and cultivating satanic panic,
All in the name of the Good Lord and Savior.
It’s the dog whistle only heard by those whose ears
Cannot think outside the Fox, where waxy yellow build-up
Is impacted, unyielding to the voice of Reason.
It’s, “OK groomer,” “Don’t say gay,” and "Let's go Brandon."
It’s the Battle Hymn of the Replacement.
It’s the influencers trending on social media.
It’s the meme that captures the lapsing of just a still moment,
Like a fly frozen in the amber of time everlasting.
It’s the universal selfie unapologetically posted on the Cloud.
You may be cool, but you’ll never be Korean cool.
And yet you try ever so hard to be.
When I slice with Occam’s butter knife
The loaf becomes a senseless pile of crumbs.
And so it goes.
I'm off to the puppy salon,
to get pampered and spoiled today,
all my pup smell will be gone,
my mom, says she likes it better that way,
they will fluff and dematt,
not sure I'll love that,
but then I'll be loving,
that warm bubble bath,
my groomer will trim me all up,
in a perfect lil pup cut,
she'll trim my nails, and my feet,
so I don't slide away on the floor,
I'll get a mist of a scent that's so sweet,
a scent called pup-o-dejore,
I'll thank my mom, for a wonderful day,
I'll try, but I don't think that I'll stay this way,
but it was great,
so I'll go back,
and my new groomer will keep me,, on the right track.
Have you ever seen a tear in a dogs eye
afraid to wag his tail hoping you have a good side
it's tail bent low and tucked to their underside
the hurt in their eyes as they try to confide
A cat or a kitten who has been beaten
will take years to trust it's soul so weaken
it will stay hidden in the blackest of shadows
afraid to eat it's life a sad ghetto
The abuse they have endured is beyond this world
yet they will still try to love you wanting praise not scorn
even when their little bodies have been broken and torn
on the streets they wonder seeking only warmth
Get up close and look into their eyes
you will see the tears that do not slide
but a broken heart from inside that cries
we gave them a name so please be humane
Please take care of me
Even if I don't understand
Touch me with a gentle hand
T Reams 8/16/15 copyright
Dedicated to the best groomer in the world who has a heart of gold for all her furry
friends- Dede
I chose a career in grooming, of course,
and went at it with total force,
the days are long, and stressfull, of course,
but a career without passion, to me,
would be much worse,
As I look into this senior dogs eyes,
I see nobility,
and that she's wise,
comfortable in her fur and skin,
and the world in which she lives,
Golden Retriever, is her breed,
she's a beauty, yes indeed,
Rosie on my grooming table,
her age is ten,
yet she's very able,
I'm a groomer trying for perfection,
blow drying her golden red fur,
section by section,
Rosie makes a leap of action,
off the grooming table,
she shoots me up a look,
of total satisfaction,
for me, this makes my days worth while,
to see her inner canine smile.
Aha...At Last,..Bitta Bing Bitta Bang
The Figurative Nail Hit On The Hair Strand Size Head!
Though no physician,
this aging baby boomer
absolutely, intuitively, and
unequivocally sensed hair loss (mine),
at first a speculative rumor
not simply in my (ahem) head,
no matter a minimalist groomer
nevertheless, thinning follicles,
upon dawning realization, sans medical
sought relief thru good humor,
though within this balding cerebral noggin
became repulsive as if my scalp
pulled pate rendered as a tumor.
Thus an unexpectedly present surprise
when in private consultation in the guise
as out patient client (early afternoon
December 19th, 2018),
where I did fraternize
and kibitz with the medical assistant
(old enough to be my...sister),
aye did exercise
mild mannered mien mean, aye do patronize
before doctor Rudolf (dearly
reigned) Roth, a practicing
Dermatologist told me no lies
his instant karma knowledge - mainly his
thirty seven years expertise
sought to excise
a prominent non cancerous mole approximately
centered middle of back
a small patch of skin,
he needed to anesthetize
nonetheless, a reassuring persona,
yours truly did lionize
(not merely, cuz
he received a five star rating,
specialist under auspices
of Penn, Medicine)
in Radnor Pennsylvania),
his modest calm did neutralize
any uneasiness, as did his pronounced
humility earn kudos to idolize
such rarely present gentility, and
unwitting capacity did harmonize,
and maximize significance to me,
asper my thinning limp
hair logically rationalize
identified underactive thyroid gland
(hypothyroidism) tubby,
which didst legitimize
no hair brained rooted concern,
hence...less reason to catastrophize',
which for no reason I
wanted to mildly emphasize,
hence choice to apostrophize...
To all you great dog owners out there,
here's a shout out from a groomer,
who sincerely cares,
keep your dog's grooming routne,
to insure that their skin and coat are prestine,
itchies, rashes and hotspots,
not only cause your dog pain,
but the constant scratching and licking,
are likely to drive you both insane,
dental hygene's important as well,
brushing teeth and gums, so breath smells swell,
a neatly trimmed coat,and a fresh clean dog smile,
will keep allour pup's,
in caninedippity style.
Buy on rumor, sell on the news
Pedo arrested, more children used
When your dog or cat get dirty,
don't get mad, or go brain swirley,
bring them to your favorite groomer,
not later, I'ts better sooner,
they'll know just what to do,
so you don't have to fret,
It's a hard and detailed process,
for the groomer, and the pet,
because,
a cat would rather chase a rat,
or wear a hat,
then ever have a bath,
rat-a-tat-tat,
fluff and buff,
snip and clip,
till all just looks prestine,
when all is said and done,
they're looking fresh-n-clean,
when pick up time arrives,
and your dog or cat come out,
quite distinguishedly,
dematted com-ple-tley,
your groomer works so very hard,
please tip accordingly.
Took Brandy to
dog groomer today,
for a bath and haircut,
she now smells like
a beautiful colorful rose
made in heaven so sweet,
not sure if this new dog
is really her that I brought home,
knowing it really is her
and loving her even more,
if that is possible.
Written 6-7-11
When your dog or cat get dirty,
don't get mad, or go brain swirley,
bring them to your favorite groomer,
not later, I'ts better sooner,
they'll know just what to do,
so you don't have to fret,
It's a hard and detailed process,
for the groomer, and the pet,
because,
a cat would rather chase a rat,
or wear a hat,
then ever have a bath,
rat-a-tat-tat,
fluff and buff,
snip and clip,
till all just looks prestine,
when all is said and done,
they're looking fresh-n-clean,
when pick up time arrives,
and your dog or cat come out,
quite distinguishedly,
dematted com-ple-tley,
your groomer works so very hard,
please tip accordingly.
Broken Vows©2017
Written by
Lewis, Y.K
My beloved, I vowed this promise to love, to honor and obey until death do us part. It was truly all my pleasure to serve you in all my duties. To walk by your side, to lay in your bed, and to bear your children to make your house a home.
To work outside and inside your home to earn my worth in your eyes. To be the housekeeper, bookkeeper, childcare provider, taxi, personal assistant, cook, animal groomer, activity coordinator, nurse, and but not least your lover.
My desire was to give you more of me and in my giving of more, I found it was too much to bear.
I am all consuming in every area of our relationship, I want, what I want, when I want it and without regard to your schedule. I was your lamb that sacrificed herself without fault of your stewardship always asking you to be mindful of the presents that were given unto you.
You hit, you lied, you schemed, you stole, you cheated, you accused, you pushed, you spoke sickness into our home, you spoke death into our family, you spoke debt into our finances, and yet there was no love.
I feared it was all my actions that caused you to treat me this way. Yet, I stayed. I stayed, but the cost of the picture presented to the public was more than I could bear.
The example of saying, “Do as I say, and not as I do.” Won’t do when you’re the example. I sought counsel for guidance to my not so unique circumstances, truth is I didn’t break my vows they were broken with the first strike, I had received from my beloved’s hands
Crisp night swirls leaves thru the air, the message's in the wind.
Something weird has happened today, the wolfman's in a spin.
He stopped by the vet who washed and detangled all his hair
Cut and snipped his ragged nails - not much, while he was there.
As he skated around the corner to pick up a new dog chain
He stopped by the groomer, who cleaned and polished his fangs.
Tonight he's meeting someone special what else could he think of-
Besides, the leaves had carried it, the Wolfman had fallen in love.
A ghost at the counter spooked, “You’ve been weird since noon”
Wolfman said nothing simply stared at time in the moon.
In a huff he said “On this special day I simply cannot be late-
Meeting someone at midnight- by the cemetery gate”.
Then he remembered he must stop- pick up fresh flowers-
A new resident's in the grave yard, only been there a few hours.
Eagerly he reached the cemetery, inhaled the smokey breeze-
Movements of the night –the swaying of the leafless trees.
The bats began serenading - with the owls from the sky right above
Again the leaves were right- the wolfman has fallen in love.
Valerie Sherman
Working in God’s Nurse’s Station
Over the years I have ministered to baby Christians as
well as seasoned saints in a prayer and prophetic ministry.
The Lord showed me when you pray for healing for them
it is as though you were picking up one of God’s sheep.
You care for them as a nurse would nursing their wounds
and speaking into their lives and then, when all is done and
well you need to release them back into His care. You
do not hang onto them even though you could have
developed a relationship with them as the Lord says they are HIS!
This really is one of the lessons we need to learn as a
servant of God if we are going to be used by the Lord
as a prayer warrior or as a sheep groomer and in some
cases a nurse maid for a young lamb. They belong to the
Master we love them and pray for them and in some cases
we speak into their lives but the time clock is His to call the
shots. We don’t want them to get their eyes on us and what
we can do but to encourage them to put their eyes on the LORD.
This relationship can last for a lifetime but more cases than not
they are just for a short period of time.
One more thing being a prayer intercessor for our family and friends
our church and the leaders of our country and other parts of the world sometimes the Lord reveals things to you that often times is only for your ears. We don’t want to go around and tell what we know to other people unless the Lord says we can. We have to be confidential about a word from the Lord that is if it is something very private. If we don’t keep it confidential the Lord won’t use you for this kind of ministry again.
The Bible says to do unto others as you would have them to do
unto you. You certainly would not want people spreading gossip about you and when there is gossip you know a lot of times people add to it and by the time it got back to you, you will be shocked as to what has been said.
Lord help Your people to use discretion.
Written by: Marilyn Jennings
June 4, 2018
Potential Limericks and poems to leek.
Planned, expand, fanned.
Manned, banned, canned.
Demand, sand, hand.
Tanned, land, grand.
Abide, relied, dyed (died).
Sighed, denied, cried.
Bagel, finagle, label.
Humming, coming, summing.
Alarming, harming, charming.
Humor, rumor, tumor.
Great Groomer, early bloomer, baby boomer.
Wand, fond, dawned.
Expound, bond, abscond.
Wait, gate, differentiate, contemplate.
Educate, satiate, consummate.
Wait, hesitate, sedate.
Jim Horn