Best Friendship Humor Poems
He stood on the street corner
Having a much needed smoke
Somehow we got chatting
And he told me a joke
And i started laughing
The way that you do
He looked at me smiling
And started laughing too
And his dog laughed too.
It became a habit
Ever after that
Every morning I’d stop
For a little chat
And listen to any joke
That he would tell
His supply seemed endless
And he told them so well
And his dog laughed too.
One day I saw the dog
Out with another guy
So I said hello to him
And I asked him why.
He said he was standing in
His dad had had a stroke
So I sent my best wishes
And I really missed his joke
And his dog just looked sad.
I asked about him every day
Was told he was improving
Was chafing at the bit to
Get his recovery moving.
I was so pleased to hear
Of progress like that
For I really missed
His joke and our chat
And his dog looked optimistic.
Then one day I saw him back
Standing there having a smoke
I bid him a good to see you
I’ve missed your daily joke.
We both laughed uproariously
As he told me his latest one
And the dog wagged his tail
All signs of sadness gone
And his dog laughed too.
I like to think that love
is Universal – even little
green men, on boggy worlds
having such fond capacity
like to think that stars
share brilliance affectionately,
giving an extra beam, here and there,
to a fellow where a twinkle lagging
like to think, that vagabond comets,
trade heartfelt sonnets in the passing
like to think that you would love me
forever...even if I wasn't so
poetically cute and clever:)
Sportin' a wrap on one foot
A hard grimace set on his jaw
A Beagle walked in, holdin a grudge
Because somebody shot his paw!
He growled, "Pour me a rain water,"
"And none of that chlorine laced crap"
The Bar dog, a well known poodle,
Said, "Sir, I take umbrage at that!"
A German Shepard said, "I'm Sheriff,"
"In charge of the pet carrier clink"
"Don't get a bee in your bonnet"
"And bar dog will pour you a drink"
The Beagle said, "I'm an abandon,"
"Raised in dirty alleys and such"
"That bein' said, about my bite,"
"It's worse than my bark, but not much"
Bar dogs sister, Pixie Poodle
Said, "Hold on boys I know this cur"
"In fact we met in an alley,"
"But I'll vouch for this Beagle for sure!"
She and the Beagle left together
Her brother, of course, had a fit!
Not to be tellin' tails out of school,
But theirs were waggin' quite a bit!
All of the wrongs we have done to each other,
We will overlook...
W's lawsuit against my church, because they will not permit him to smoke there,
My interminable and intolerable lateness,
J's calling me, 'pathetic',
MY frustration with W's 'INCORRECT' political opinions,
W's insults, via text message,
MY chauvinism about my religion...
J's unpleasant, unfriendly criticism...
ALL these, we will overlook...
And give each other a good ribbing!
It was my birthday 3 days ago, and W buys me breakfast,
And J gives me a birthday gift,
And we all decide to like each other again --
That is, as long as I am willing to take
A proper beating at chess... THREE TIMES!
And it's all good!
All of the wrongs, we don't mention them.
Except, I squeeze W's shoulder, when I come up, and gently remind him
That we agreed to meet on Saturday...
(They called me today, impatient -- it's Friday -- to say, they are WAITING for me)
And "...oh, did I say SATURDAY?" W asks, wryly, and we all laugh,
And it's all good!
We have forgotten the arguments.
I ask for the family news, and it's all good!
You see, each of us knows,
You cannot replace ONE Friendship, with BEING RIGHT.
So, each of us silently admits to himself
That he was wrong,
And we smile, and it's all good!
And THAT'S the Kindness of Men.
Emilia J, so lovely and light, no sun-bearing song, could be singing so bright,
In the heat of the day, or the chill of the night, Emilia J, is a beautiful sight,
At the core of the Earth, or the crag-bearing crust, Emilia J, is a beacon of trust,
If you batter your bread, in a bag-tearing bust, Emilia J, is a poetry must.
Emilia J, how great can you be, writing your poems from the top of a tree,
The crows are upset, invariably, but Emilia J, is a blossom to me,
Her writing is finer than rabbits have hares, Emilia J, is a friend to the bears,
If poetry, possibly, prickles your pears, Emilia J, is a poet who cares.
Queen Poetess
"Queen Poetess?".thou doth makest me laugh!
I have finally quilled a poem this summer morning, at long last!
To thee, a link, with friendship, shall rapidly fly,
Across the magic, mystical technological sky.
The Queen and her pet, doth with health and happiness shine.
So grateful you are a dear and close friend of mine.
Now get thee to thy gifted quill and waiting pen.
Author your poetry, to bring bounteous joy to both women and men!
With royal love and happiness,
Queen Poetess and ^*^
Notes. This was written in jest, answering an email to a poet friend here.
Hilarious, the poet called me "Queen Poetess,"when I do not in anyway, think
I am that....Pangie 8/13/2020.
I have no big head nor arrogance. I consider myself your equal,inmy own way.
August 13, 2020
11:30pm PST
Here goes...
she said
it loudly and
proudly:
Hello…
l`m a miss
and l miss
you inside out
Truly…
I miss you like
bees really miss
their honey
Wow…
water for my thirst
food for my hunger
scratch for my itch
Well…
want to take
to you like
duck to water
Oh…
you draw me
to you like
moth to light
Yes…
you are my cake
my cup of goodies
my hot ice-cream
Indeed…
at night my moon
daytime my sun
your love my light
Relax…
take a seat
I sold that heater
for your heat
Please…
you bathe in milk
l bask in your presence
a sublime quench
Finally…
what she did not
say is that we`re close
strangers on the net!
A woman friend, of gorgeous pulchritude,
presents a man with an experience
of nervous, elated, erotic mood:—
to him it's a most welcomed "hinderance."
A guy friend of strong, chiseled, sexy good looks,
makes a woman self-conscious and confused,
when reading, "Fifty Shades of Grey," (soft-**** books)
and thinking of him while fully aroused.
They both may think of the possibilities,
and then wonder: "What can it hurt...if we cross
that line?" But is it worth the realities,
the risks, and the very real, potential loss
of a friendship? Best friends may be real fine,
but is it worth a hay roll (on Cloud Nine)?
These three things I have learned today,
no, not just one or two;
The lessons here I have to say
came while I Souped with you.
Real friendship gained has great value
there’s pleasure in it too;
though I expect not all of you
would want my friendship, true?
Another thing I’ve learned is that
when in doubt learn to ask -
‘Tis better to have known the fact
than make a big faux pas.
And still there’s that third lesson here:
Though one thinks he has class,
Soupers will know if not sincere
and be after his a$$.
*To all Soupers, this is not a slam, just having a blast with the gang!
21 February 2015
he wakes up
in the early morn
he is grouchy
mean as a lout
he barks
at times
I wonder
does he have green ears and a big snout?
Horns sticking out of his devilish head
I bet he steals gifts to hide under his bed
I had him arrested
the police, they had him thoroughly tested
is he just a Grinchy grouch?
or a grouchy Grinch who stole all of Christmas?
He is hairy and green
he stole all the maple syrup it surely seems
the Mounted Police have unfortunately seen
he eats pancakes with brown French baked beans!
Now we all know a crime has been absolutely committed
we can smell the evidence thus evicted
This Grinch or grouch or who knows what
well he smells and yes he also pouts!
He pleads and begs
and begs some more
please a coffee, I am just out of bed!
I am not so bad, once my coffee I have had!
Well, look at that angel face, he can't be all that mad!
All the children came running, up to the jail
laughing and dancing., at this grouch so frail
let him out, let him out , they all chant and sing
This is Dear Santa, not that green Grinchy grouchy old lout
Even the most innocent of infants knows
a morning without a cupa
all would be grouchy, no one at all goes with outa
double double, and a donut to take
Why this is saint nick, his beard clearly shows
Look at the red suit, come on, every kid knows
see over there that wheel chair decked in red
and 12 reindeer all ready to pull that wheelchair sled!
Waiter waiter!
look!
but monsieur
you ordered a minnow soup, n'est pas?
Waiter waiter
Not one swimming
around in my soup
a brown minnow full of brown poop
I don't want minnow poop
in the soup
why look, its a bald beady eyed minnow
waiter! I swear this minnow is drunk
ah Monsieur, we give all our minnows wine
before death
Waiter now I know why Greeks
throw dishes at walls
I swear than damn minnow tried to write
a poem, what gaul!
Plato must be going mad
in his grave
Monsieur , can we offer you some Coock & Hen whiskey
to drown out this bad taste?
No comment
They say “You are only as strong
as the person standing beside you.”
There have been times when that thought…
frightened me, for the person standing
beside me……..was……..well……
let’s just say….. I didn’t choose to stand
beside them.
Perhaps it was a strange twist of fate,
you know…..a karmic curve ball –
and I was supposed to be the strong one.
I have been in rooms full of people,
all standing beside one another,
and thought: “We’re all screwed”,
“look at this collection of inbred inhumanity.”
I now know – sadly – they were thinking
the same thing. No one asked for a show
of hands as to who the “strong” ones were,
no “leader” T-shirts labeled them, no super
hero music played as they entered the room.
They were there – throughout my life –
those ubiquitous stalwarts, friends,
mentors, speed bumps, guideposts,
showing up to stand beside me
even when I didn’t know why they
were there.
I know now – why they were there –
coincidence, chance, providence,
the kindness of a humorous god,
the gift of serendipity, the luck of the draw.
I know now why I was there, why we were there.
We are only as strong as the person standing beside us
and the person standing beside them and the person standing……..
Well, anyway, I’m proud to be counted among this
collection of screwed up, inbred, inhumanity.
It is a pleasure to stand with you all.
John G. Lawless
1/17/2015
A puppeteer and a columnist
Two greeting persons of great talent
A writer and a simple artist
Met in New York on a bench God-sent
Acquaintance that brought humor and scent
To watchers and walkers awed with skill
Moving and talking puppets that shrill
All In Sean
Monday at the Kings is poker and beer
There is ale drinking banter and cheer
A donation is put in a charity jar
Kept in full view behind the bar
Attending is tfhe boldest player ever born
He goes by the name of All In Sean
All in, all in, all in Sean
The boldest player ever born
All in,all in,all in Sean
The boldest player ever born.
A smile appears on his face
As he looks at a second ace
There is no ifs there is no buts
He tells all that he has the nuts
There is only one option for All in Sean
The boldest player ever born.
All in, all in, all in Sean
The boldest player ever born
All in,all in,all in Sean
The boldest player ever born.
He picks up seven two off
Sean could not give a toss
A flush draw appears on the flop
Still Sean with his chips gamble the lot
He still might hit says All in Sean
The boldest player ever born
All in, all in, all in Sean
The boldest player ever born
All in,all in,all in Sean
The boldest player ever born.
But Sean does not mind being bold
For he also has a heart of gold
As long as money goes to Wishes For Kids
And he helps them by raising a few quid.
I do it for them says All in Sean
The boldest player ever born.
All in, all in, all in Sean
The boldest player ever born
All in,all in,all in Sean
The boldest player ever born.
One last time,
the very last opportunity
My mood is really on edge
I've learned so much,
and I am so eternally grateful
It is extremely difficult and very emotional
and write my latest contest poem
... suddenly the whole world collapses
Remember, make your entry easy to read
Publish the post at the right time
Read the competition rules ...
Glory, Glory, Glory ... Hallelujah
A tribute to those close to me
and who understands me
... give me support for who I am
- which always makes me smile and laugh
Rain or sun ...
Happiness can be enjoyed twice, with friends
Friends are the family you choose
on the journey of life
Thanks to all my poetic
and wonderful friends
Finally:
Dear sponsor
... we need more competitions ...
otherwise we will not get a train to run!
18.07.2020
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved
If this was my last poetry contest poem Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Silent One
2nd place in the contest