Best Chancer Poems

Too little 
too late
God said to me 
in this dream I had about fate

So I asked him 
what did he expect, 
A goody two shoes 
a prophet 
a saint 
to be something I ain’t 

Not at all he said 
I want to be entertained 
Eternity...

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I guess we can struggle when we sit down to write
But use your own words - to plagiarise isn’t right
When I read a poem that’s simply too good to be true 
I then begin to question, was it even written by ‘you’ 

If I google...

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Furnace pink roses blushed on your cheeks,
I held my breath when I saw you there,
Stood in the sand in a gossamer dress,
That clung to your form as the breeze caught your hair.

Bruises of rain clouds filled up your eyes,
I held you close when your spirits...

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Susie's pet name was Wanda-zilla
and hailed from jungles near Manila.
Her poetry was swill
so to pay all her bills
she did strip shows for native gorillas.

She went to merry old U.K.
To make more money stripping all day.
When folks voted for Brexit
they meant Susie must exit
to get rid...

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Puppet on your strings

You own me...
own my body and soul.
You play me...
you've taken complete control.

You can do anything 
that you want ...with me
You play me... (I'm like)
a puppet on your strings

Watch me now!
You can make me, do anything
I'm willing...
'Cause I'm your puppet ...yeah
I'm a puppet...

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I consulted a tyromancer
To see if I could find an answer
She consulted some cheese
And told me so much sleaze
I’m convinced she’s just a fat chancer!

Written after I read an article in the dentist’s waiting room today and I discovered that Tyromancy is form of divination...

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It's the devil's dance, he is a chancer,
As he tries to take this life to cancer.
The news to fill your heart with dread,
As you, process words inside your head.

This news it brings a bitter sting,
The devil's joy that fate can bring.
He's a chancer bold in...

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Dreams - is their origin from merely
A vivid imagination,
Because for millenniums stretching 
Back, to the beginning of Civilization, 
Dreams have forever intrigued man. 
They even approached the gods of yesteryear,
Don’t know what they were smoking,
But they must have been rocking, 
For they had to appear...

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My hair is dyed to hide the grey and how my boobies sag
But I have it on good authority I’m a ‘Walnut Wag’

A ‘Walnut Wag’ … what’s that you may ask
I will enlighten you for that’s my task

A ‘Walnut Wag’ is the partner of someone...

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I guess we can struggle when we sit down to write
But use your own words - to plagiarise isn’t right
When I read a poem that’s simply too good to be true 
I then begin to question, was it even written by ‘you’ 

If I google...

Continue reading...

from island corner, big Antrim lad
  to Belfast city, a tiny pad
  shattered windows, tilted clocks
  Goliath had lost his socks
  gargantuan giant going mad

  Armagh apple girl, any topic
  she star-gazed past the misanthropic
  vantage point, two...

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Zila 'the killa' chinchilla as he was known
Sat in his villa on his golden throne
He was a marvel a maverick a real joker
A prancer, a chancer, a lifelong nonsmoker 
Our boy 'the killa'.
Never mediocre, always bodacious 
With girls he was, I say, flirtatious
Feeling alive never...

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Your light at night will draw many men out 
In black your light-candles a love call out
They will emerge at night at break of black
Your light a drug to men on beauty’s track 

Your beauty draws men from the shadow’s cold
To flames of light your...

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being right all the time can be very boring ...
  if always right, perhaps you may have little to say
  that's problematic for all-powerful beings, godlike creatures
  the rest of us engage in memory storing ...
  being a bit right and...

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Dear Judy: 

 

As I scrolled anxiously through my inbox, flipping through needless letters, hoping for an answer,  

I suddenly realized that out of all the emails Ms. Blume receives, I was taking an awful heck of a chancer. 

 

And soon enough, there...

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