Best Billy Goat Poems
Humankind
8/9/2023
How oft’ have you been told, to not
rock the boat!
Just go along as an obedient, mute
billy goat.
Just chew on the green, fresh, cud,
Or smile always , be it in rain or in
thick mud.
This may be peachy keen for goats
you see.
But we are special, we are humanity.
When our brothers freedom and rights
are being stolen.
We must stand as one, for tis the God of
the Universe to which we are beholden!
The purple on his chin was tellin'
there was just no use to lie.
That pesky, good for nothin' goat
had eaten Mother's pie.
She had set it on the porch
jist to cool it down a bit,
and don't you know that goat had come
and calmly eaten it.
My little brother looked as if
he was inclined to cry.
They'd warned him things
would have to change
or Billy Goat would die.
I got a rag to help him scrub
that bright dye off his whisker.
He could appeal to Mom's good side,
but didn't want to risk her.
That goat had climbed on everythin'
from our new car to house.
He'd eaten nightshirts off the line.
No wonder Mom would grouse.
I'll kill that goat", our mother said
a dozen time or so.
Of course she didn't mean it but
our brother didn't know.
Now little brother'd come along
when most of us were growed.
He never seem to learn the ways
the rest of us all knowed.
He didn't learn to work around
our mama's laws and such.
He had no wiles to pertect him.
His goat was sure in dutch.
Bein' so much younger must be tough
and not too easy sailin'.
His best friend was this pesky goat
and that was fast a failin'.
He guessed the only way to go
was take his goat and run.
He didn't think to take a coat
and weinies and a bun.
The rest of us when we run off,
we knowed enough to take
some warm clothes and some
sandwitches 'n even choclit cake.
We were all scared when brother
didn't turn up for a meal
and we could see the worry our
mama began to feel.
So Daddy got his good horse Dan
and took the dogs along,
and said he'd just go scout him out;
be sure nothin' was wrong.
It seemed a good long time before
we saw Dad ridin' back
with somethin' on his saddle.
It looked much like a sack.
But it was our little brother
and he was sound asleep.
Dad found him in the orchard
with apples in a heap.
His cunnin' goat had climbed up
in the ole apple tree
and flung down the ripe apples,
as nimble as can be.
So brother wasn' hungry
but he was mighty weary.
Our mother grabbed him in her arms
and all of us were teary.
That wily goat was smart enough
to prove himself a winner.
He'd saved our brother and himself
from becoming our goat dinner.
By: Joyce Johnson
A fallacy, that every 'once upon a time'
is a beautiful fantasy, for some hold lies
Fairytales have a hero, but also a villain
masked in sheep's clothing as a disguise
Red Riding Hood defeated the Big Bad Wolf
Billy Goat Gruff butted a troll to the stream
Simba overthrew Scar, vile imposter king
People are not always what they seem
A fancy dressed pirate was Captain Hook
Voldemart was He Who Must Not Be Named
Shere Khan, a snake slithering in the grass
Cold-hearted scoundrels should be blamed
Crows cluster to feast upon weak and dying
Sharks speed to feed in frenzied gathering
Wicked queens and witches jostle for power
boasting in gibberish while foolishly blathering
With evil intentions, dark minds contemplate
lurking in shadows while stalking their prey
for vengeance and spite, they congregate
water holes are dangerous on any given day
A real hero has no need to don a serape
Doesn't wield a sword with sharpened blade
A person with courage can dip a nib in ink
Dress in pink ruffles, wear her hair in a braid
Never tempt fate by entering a dragon's lair
Do not willfully step into the nest of a viper
or praise a chamaleon for its deceitful charade
while he plays the luring tune of a Pied Piper
Think carefully before you fork your tongue
or write words that can easily be misconstrued
Throw off the sinister attitude of a blackguard
unless you take delight in being labeled "crude"
and smitten with her moist entwine,
he savoured like the red, red wine,
as passion engulfed the post,
she was the surely most,
till oblivion unwinds....
and he gave up his ghost,
and a sympathetic mine,
no lesbians this time,
but that gets on your Goat,
till next head butting time,
he kissed her subtle throat,
and it began to climb,
no not the Billy goat,
intercourse aint a crime,
chocolate covered cherries are the toast:}
the heat remained sublime,
dem cherries are the most!
Don re Debbie Duncan "chocolate covered cherries"
Leccy Powers in the Air
Nikola Tesla knew the score,
back there, wayback in 1894,
send-em power through the post,
bloody radio antennae, sends the ghost ,
wireless sends the power,
from the insulated tower,
tuned aeriel sucks the most,
fine tuned it is the host,
a quarter wave deflowers,
when electric car un-powers,
recharge from power radio remote,
a constant radio wave, unquote,
or constant flow empowers,
Leccy car you Billy Goat ! :}-
So ac power is in the air,
detected by the car, right there,
powered then the Billy Goat,
tuned aerial , sucks in the voltage, know it!
Leccy car can run 4 sure!
Don't need no petrol, where?
just leccy techs, leccy motors go-at,
says johnson, with a slight unquote,
the new world is to share,
if it catches em by the throat,
the dimwits wouldn't dare,
but some ones got to show it ?
Eg frequency of 27 megacycles cb radio 27,000,000 a second.
So put a 9 foot antennae on you car to receive the signal current?
It works out shorter for much faster frequencies like your mobile phone.
A few inches, a few centimeters etc...
So the sent electricity gets collected at the right length antennae and
runs the leccy motor in your car...sounds cool to me …
id be wearing wellies or gum boots to avoid a shock from the powered antennae 250volts maybe, if I touched it:} kill switches needed hey...
Don Johnson
BEFORE 20,000 YEARS AGO THE ATLANTEAN PEOPLE OF THE RED SKIN TYPE,
HAD SUBMARINES AND AEROPLANES. {VALIXI}. POWERED AND CONTROLLED BY RADIO WAVES TECHNOLOGY REMOTELY..{ARE WE TOO RETARDED TO DO IT???}...INDUS VALLEY PEOPLE HAD VIMANA
FLYING MACXHINES TOO AT THAT TIME....AND WROTE HOW FIX THE MERCURY ENGINE...
Do we have to res-surect ole Tesla?
to get it to work? ac electricity can be
transmitted through the air! as he said...
easily converted to dc voltage by rectifiers...as in power supplys....
like having your own power pole on the car...
Ned was grandma's billy goat,
The meanest goat in town;
Every time you crossed his path,
He'd try to butt you down!
Buddy was our neighbor,
A twisted lil' teen;
He always nagged that billy goat,
For that's what made him mean!
Fate caught up to Buddy,
We had an awful scare;
He slipped on muddy soil,
With his butt in open air!
Ned saw his target,
"KA-THUD!!"...was all we heard;
Buddy flew across the way,
I could swear he passed a turd!
Buddy tried to squeeze himself,
Between a wooden gate;
Mercy failed to comprehend,
By then, it was all too late!
Trapped like a weary mouse,
Bud's rump in open view;
Ned landed fifty thumps,
His butt turned black n' blue!
It took us all to save him,
Talk about a battered fig;
All the while he was screamin',
Like a frightened little pig!
Hot baths and epsom salts,
A lesson Buddy gained;
He slept beneath a ceiling fan,
To ease his throbbing pain!
Oh, what a laughing stock,
We teased him constantly;
"BILLY GOAT!!", we'd often cry,
Just to watch him flee!
Northside of Chi-Town is full of emotion.
In the ‘45 Series Cubs and Tigers are battling.
Sianis buys two tickets to show his devotion.
Is booted ‘cause his billy goat won’t stop bahbling.
He curses the Cubbies and causes a commotion.
But spring is rooted in fans' love and devotion
Like lush, green, yellow, crimson, ivy will never
Stop growing. Year after year fans fear
Hearts will shatter but remain forever
Faithful chanting “Wait ‘til next year!”
Generations grow up cheering with great emotion.
Generations grow old enduring gut-wrenching loss
Bleeding among Lovable Losers time
And again, but no Cubbie faithful dares cross
To the Southside—it’d be a traitorous crime.
In 2003, faithful fans’ love and devotion
Promises fruition as Dusty Baker
Arrives Northside heralded as the Cubs’ savior.
But NLCS Game 6 at Wrigley is a heartbreaker.
Cubs need five outs but collide with a traitor.
Steve Bartman’s still in hiding; his name elicits emotion.
Castillo’s bat aims grenade over foul territory.
Cubs’ fielder Alou springs towards the heavens to snatch
But when feet touch dirt Cubs land in purgatory.
Faithful gasp: Curse of the Billy Goat sets a rematch.
Since that fateful day in ‘45 exploding with emotion
Wrigley hasn’t seen another World Series.
Since Bartman's affair in 2003, Cubs haven’t won
A playoff series. But Billygoat yaks to Mrs. O’Leary’s
Ol’ Cow an’ scoffs at the new scapegoat’s unearned run.
In 2011, after 91-losses, Ricketts proves his devotion
Adding the sabermetrics guru who now values emotions.
Epstein arrives at Northside championing human connections
Rebuilds Cubs’ roster with players who reverse the motion
108-years and character solves equation for a winners’ resurrection.
Hearts ripping open is a crushing emotion
But fans never stopped believin' in near
Foreseeable future ‘cause they’re loyal
Lovers and nothin’s as good as baseball ‘n’ beer
At Wrigley for 81 games on your own home soil.
Here is another true story that happened down on this southeast corner of North
Carolina. We do not live in a rural area so a goat is a very rare site. Especially on
someone's front porch. As with the last true story - this did not happen to me
personally but to one of my neighbors. I never get this lucky. Mike
Going out for a while so I grabbed my coat
Opened the door – on my porch was a goat
A goat? Said my wife. A goat’s what I said
Like a big shaggy dog with horns on his head
So I called the cops – dialed up 9-1-1
I said to the cops, “you’d best come on the run
For out on my porch (here you’d best take a note)
Is a four-legged white thing I think is a goat
Has there been a bank robbery (come on you can tell)
This goat looks suspicious and guilty as hell”
When the cops stopped their laughing, they said with a wink
Had I been out in the sun, maybe too much to drink
Did I really expect them to drop what they’re doing
For a billy goat out on my porch just a chewing
But cops said they’d be there and they’d bring a rope
So I stood in the doorway feeling just like a dope
For out on my porch was a gentle old goat
And I stood just shaking still holding my coat
Afraid to go out with this Billy Goat Gruff
This story is true, you can’t make up this stuff
And where was my wife while I made the call
Laughing her head off just down the hall
Making fun of my posture, my stature, my stance
It’d just serve her right if she wet her pants.
Mdailey
06/07/08
He seized the role and ripped it to shreds
He chewed up the scenery like an insane Billy Goat
He snickered, he smirked, he roared, he raged
He bared his teeth, sneered and grinned like a demon
He terrorized and improvised (Heeere’s Johnny!!)
He primped and he pranced
He rocked and he rolled
He had a damn ball…
Jack Nicholson in ‘The Shining’
Jack was also the first choice to play the role of Father Damien Karras in ‘The Exorcist’, but the role was turned over to Jason Miller….It would have been a miscast. Sure, he would have jumped out the window but not to his death, not Jack!...He would have bounced back up and ran off to terrorize the entire neighborhood...
For Frank's contest
Billy
Written: by Tom Wright
2/9/2016
I once had a Billy Goat, past tense,
That feeding made very little sense.
So I sold him of course,
And had little remorse,
For I couldn’t keep him in the fence
Didn’t know a goat had to die
To make grandma’s dish so delicious.
Fileted meat
Marinated in herb and spice:
Onion, garlic, black pepper, clove and thyme
Pan griddled, embracing black char
Simmer in oil
Sizzling, a snake’s hiss
Aroma drew nose near, from afar
A dinner’s delight
A black fur billy goat
Eyes starring widely
Chewed green, so unaware
Doomed for demise
To adorn dinner plates
Prey to the hunter’s ritual
Age old, as time
Sharp blade placed to throat
Its red soaked the earth
Free -verse 03/07/15
by Marckincia Jean
It's been a long season,
With Vict'ry our reason.
Cub's baseball is always a joke.
We just needed four,
Though we wanted more,
Our victory's near we had spoke.
A billy goat ban,
Then Bartman the fan
They're reasons we like to evoke.
They may well have been,
And might come again
But the Cubs see the big one and choke.
Who am I? I am not Fred Flintstone, nor am I Billy Goat Gruff,
And I am not Will Shakespeare, nor a Scotsman named MacDuff;
I am not Tom, I am not Dick, and surely am not Harry;
Not Goldilocks, not Tiny Tim, nor Mary Quite Contrary;
I am not a famous movie star, Bo Peep, or the Tooth Fairy,
And I most certainly am not Frankenstein…you’d find that way too scary.
What am I? I am not a mouse,
Nor a waffle iron, nor a ring-necked grouse;
I am not a little teapot, short and stout;
This is not my handle, and this is not my spout;
I am not a praying mantis, and not a Brussels sprout.
And I clearly am not a billiard ball, that’s just not what I’m about.
Where am I? I am not in Coney Island, in Denmark, or in France,
Nor am I in (I’m glad to say) some weird hypnotic trance;
I am not alone in the jungle, with nothing to eat but roots;
Nor am I weightless on the moon, wearing ridiculous astronaut boots;
I am not in a line at the airport, not Chicago’s or Beirut’s.
I think I’ll stay right where I am ‘til I gets up and scoots.
When am I? I am not in prehistoric times, with a T-rex for a pet,
Or in the way distant future (at least I’m not there yet);
I am not with Mister Gutenberg, who invented the printing press,
Nor am I with Orville and Wilbur, whose airplane flew, more or less.
There are lots of times in history when I might have been born, I guess -
But I’m glad not Pompey when Vesuvius blew. Boy, was that ever a mess.
Why am I? The reason I am upon this earth is a thing I have yet to find,
I may spend my days playing baseball, or maybe I’ll help mankind;
Perhaps I’ll find the cure for some terrible disease,
And once that’s done, I’ll buy a yacht and sail the seven seas.
I’ll make new friends and spread good cheer and maybe learn Chinese.
One thing for sure, as life goes on, there’ll be lots and lots of me’s.
In the slushy bog, lived one speckled frog
He loved to have fun and didn’t wish to slog
Croaky Frog was his dear name
To travel and enjoy life was his aim
One day he set out, wearing his hat
On the way he met a furry rat
He asked- “Hey rat, will you come with me
Lovely scenes are there for us to see”
The rat replied- “Yes, I shall come with you
I too like the beautiful sights to view”
Soon they saw a tabby cat on their way
Rat ran in fear and hid behind some hay
Croaky, instantly jumped into a well
Seeing a snake in, he began to yell
“Save me, save me” cried the desperate frog
The evening was veiled with thick fog
Billy goat and friends were grazing around
They heard from the well a desperate sound
In minutes, they arrived and saved the frog
Thanking his friends, the frog fled to his bog
Feb.28. 2023
~ Placed First~
Nursery Rhyme Poetry Contest
Sponsor- Eve Roper
And the leopard shall lie down with the kid
Isa. 11:6
My, my, my
Fancy meeting you here, kid
You're looking good enough to eat,
you got good taste, I can tell
Back in the day,
you woulda made a mighty fine leopard treat
But I'm a vegetarian now,
don't that make you wanna say, holy cow
Well, well, well
I'm flattered how you spotted me so easily
You see I'm stepping with a new look,
I'm not the same person I used to be
No more billy goat, stubborn and tough streak;
now, I'm just a nice, tender-hearted person,
no longer selling myself like a piece of meat
Indeed, indeed, indeed
It's a new world we're living in,
and all the changes look very good to me
No more predators, high brow
Puffy hearts, no elite
No more helpless prey,
or diseased minds
No more spiritual effete
Um, um, um
The purr of your voice sounds so sweet,
I'm loving the words you're speaking to me
No more cruel urban jungles,
or village mires of poverty
No more vacuous rural living,
no more suburban sterility
Let's give a non-fermented toast,
fare good riddance to the old way
Yes, let us come eat, drink and be merry,
refresh our souls at the new world café