Best Bill Poems

*To fully appreciate this a person would have to be at least somewhat familiar with the movie: Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure

"Dude, here's a heads up - ENTROPY BITES!" said Bill as he limped up to the table. "Waitress, coffee on the dark, please. Uh,...

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If you ever drive through our small Oregon Town
You won't help but notice the house that's run down
A man called Bill Disney lived there for ten years
When we learnt of his story it brought many tears.

He was covered in burn scars and walked with a...

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R.I.P. William Dale Eubanks
d. July 1, 2012, aged 68 yrs., Tennessee Ridge, Tennessee

Death came as no surprise
the first Sunday in July;
it claimed you, on a ridge in Tennessee,
with kin who took you in and waited with you
through the last hard days.
You kept what fears you...

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Come by the Sword, Die by the Sword

They stood in ranks a thousand long
High upon the hill
The Roman legion, fierce and strong
With sword and lance and bill

The Briton hoards below them stare
With wild fanatic eyes
They jeer the foe and beg them dare
With anger and despise

Come...

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A sex mad codger named Bill
Swallowed a Viagra pill
His todger did rise - 
You should see the size
It sure gave his wife a thrill

17th Feb 2015...

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That’s not my elephant, this here’s Ella my wife
She claims the extra pounds came with her change of life

She now takes ballet, but watching her dance in tights
Sends chills down my spine and gives second graders frights

Her plate’s piled high with lasagna and spaghetti
Chowing down...

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Never hid in Jefferson Airplane
Never beat his wife
Never wept on the floor of jail
Never drank his life away
Never ranted on soldiers grave
Never changed his name
Never came back from the dead...

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In Memory of Jimmy Dale Still, Barrel horse rider, KIA,  Song Be, Viet Nam, 1/1/70

Old Bill,
swaybacked, sand burrs in his mane.
He stands no longer hopefull by the fence up near the house,
but follows the shade around the shed,
switching flys.

Nearby the dented barrels
rust rank and...

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Hydro bill
Visa bill
Food bill
Toilet paper bill
Heating bill
Wine bill
Car bill
Phone bill
Clothing bill
Duck bill
Buffalo bill
Entertainment bill
Anti acids tablets bill
Insurance bill
Bar bill
House bill
Weed bill
Bakery bill
Starbucks bill
Medical bill
Psychotic drugs bill
Dental bill
Legal bill
( for murdering dentist)
Lawn bill
Maid bill
Sexy maid bill
Super sexy maid bill
Misc hookers bill
Feminists lawsuit bill
Internet bill
Cable bill
Speeding ticket...

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Wild Bill Bailey loved his liquor
far too much for his own good-
Spent his days in smokey taverns
draining far more than he should.

Adeline had long suspected
as he rode off into town
that he'd rather wet his whistle
than get wed and settle down.

So she gave an ultimatum:
'Quit the...

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SONNET FOR BILL

He told me of a driving force within
That urged in every game where he took part
An undiminished thrust to always win
Impelled him then to play with all his heart

Thus images of my own recollection
School player and athlete of high prowess
Yet he recalled one...

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In a little West Texas cow town years ago
There was an  old doctor by the name of Hill
Little man, mild mannered, cheerful until made mad
He doctored old cowboys and drunks when things got slow
His usual cure was a kick in the butt and a...

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“Happy Birthday to Bill Baker for February the 10th”
A poet friend held in such high esteem
A man of wisdom and positivity
Who shines as brightly as a beacons beam

A kind, respectful man
A poet extraordinaire
Abundant with understanding and compassion
His good humour he is now beginning to share

So,...

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Bill Bulldog was our gorgeous British Bull Dog. We were so lucky to have Bill in our lives for eleven wonderful years. Bill was like no other dog we ever had before. A gentle boy ~ a character!  My granddaughter was always scared of...

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To speak for those, who no longer have a voice,
were I to get it wrong, would they really have a choice?

No.., they didn't choose me as spokesperson, why would they?
I am not clairvoyant.
But they haunt my dreams still...cause me to rise, plead me to look...

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