Best Amount Poems
Take a look at your muffin, and look at mine.
This is a scenario that doesn’t appear fine.
This morning, we are off to an awful start.
There are no blueberries in mine while yours is falling apart.
You have to admit this is a terrible sight.
I have to do everything myself to make sure it’s done right.
I want an equal amount of blueberries in each muffin here.
I don’t care how long it takes. Do I make myself clear?
I am appalled to see all of the negatives going on.
If you do not comply with my wishes, then you are gone.
And by the way, fire that slots manager jerk.
My place is not where I want him to work.
He doesn’t show the least amount of competency.
I don’t care if he’s juiced in. To me, he is history.
Based on the 1995 film “Casino”
your name.you rights.edge
comical papers hiding
in the sand of water
Will the erratic nature of my thoughts never be quelled?
Am I doomed to long for what I do?
Is this the outcome to never having what you want?
If it is...I suppose I should have expected as much
Nay, I knew what would happen
But I chose to accept it
To Endure It
The choice was mine alone
All of Them
For Better or Worse
They were made
I live with them
Being all I can Do
But...perhaps there is a possibility
Although, I know what it is a I am thinking
False Hope to keep my spirits up when they should not be
of things d\found the scope
peace has existed with hope
even if a dope
did a bin blooper
had become a storm trooper
real super duper
together did click
with such a good looking chick
who of crop was pick
while wearing muzzle
put together my puzzle
together nustle
fell off of the curb
did violently disturb
shouted ugly verb
what we must mention
must bring on abolition
needing ammunition
around tree was stirrup
then did make maple syrup
when we ate would burp
state of total shock
when we saw value of our stock
was a bunch of crock
had heard wise old owl
perfect and always my pal
said jokes which were fowl
(hit balls which were fowl)
(needed crying towel)
(movement in big bowel)
we could always check
how dirty had been the deck
was a complete wreck
thought he was a twit
not only that is a nit
had another fit
clocks we found a few
that would go coco coco
then he went coco
for soil need tester
buried there is ancestor
where they would fester
what we do detest
women who are with big breast
involved in incest
was a ding a ling
horrible songs he would sing
no brains ever bring
lighting caused thunder
there had been a blunder
we misplaced plunder
are both sides of fence
and prefer experience
without an offense
republican gerrymander (Gerry rigged)
was dozy and a dander
when they would pander
even though trial rig
convicted put in the brig
took another swig
heard they called him Carl
should see snake when it will snarl
slithering through laurel
virulent vulture
much trouble tried to culture
now in sepulcher
neither did annoy
and liked both girl and boy
both did enjoy
could be a carrier
am bored and need barrier
walked my terrier
was under much strain
no stain would ever remain
so we went insane
(efforts were in vein)
(ran over by train)
(born without a brain)
will have to admit
when we would catch wind of it
had been a big hit
would you be so kind
help me find lost peace of mind
I had left behind
known to resemble
Trump and did disassemble
had made us trimble
he had blown his stack
had hard time bringing it back
while making wise crack
Most People for Most Amount
The most successful politician
will be the one who can satisfy
all of the voters all of the time.
This must be their main objective.
It is the ideal position but not
realistic. The realistic one is to
try and satisfy the most people
for the most amount of time.
Below is my Horn haiku for this.
How can a person
Satisfy the most people
For most amount of time?
That might not be the typical
form of haiku but it is mine.
James Thomas Horn
Retired Veteran and Poet
there is not a number for the amount of times i have thought of you just today
they double and they multiply by the second
my amount of love for you an endless cup
i wish you could drink from
if only i had the strength to tell you what you already know
to affirm your thoughts for they are just as complex, if not more than mine
to revel in the feeling of conversation and oneness
to look at you and see a reflection of myself
even if we don’t talk as we used to, you still know me the most.
i wish to keep it that way.
to know all your secrets and clutch them so close that not a breath could be taken near them
to protect you with a soft love, a gentle love, an intimate love
to assure you that when you speak with me, you are safe
there is not a number for the amount of times i have thought of you just today
You’re the one, who gave birth to me,
I came from you,
Not the other way around.
Why do you fear me?
Do you think I shall mutilate your mind,
I can.
Do you think that I lip about you,
I’m not going to lie,
I do.
I’m a teenager with a mother,
Who I never knew,
And a step father who thinks he’s my dad.
What do you expect of me?
I am stronger than you.
I am wiser than you.
If I was going to mutilate your very being,
You would already be through.
Why do I navigate you.
This is all so backwards.
Why do you fear me?
Why do I ask this?
I am the very strongest.
My energies have mutilated people to insanity.
I am the very being of insanity and suicide.
I deserve to die.
I don’t wish to hurt anyone.
I don’t wish to scare you.
I’ll never amount to anything!!
The amount of love you have for
someone, seems too always be
greater than the
amount of pain they give you,...
Becuase no matter how much they
hurt you ,.. you
chose to stay... Strength is nothing
more than how well you hide the
pain,... Not all
scars show, Not all wounds HeAl,
Sometimes you cant always see the
pain someone else
feels,.. Love me when i least deserve
it, becuase that is when i need it the
most!!!!
Michael my love,... im sorry that i
am soo mean i just want you too
know that i love
you with every depth of my soul,..
even tough we dont always get
along when were
apart its those kind of things that i
miss!!! I love you my sweet and
sour...
Might help explain how fruit
full this harmless poetic brute,
(a Methacton School of hard knocks
grad), who sports astute
demeanor with ample
brew netted locks,
vaguely androgynously cute,
his trademark signature hirsute
unstyled wavy hair
tell tale characteristic,
not that I care if anyone
gives rats ass and/or hoot
bummer attire acceptable since
long unemployed and
recipient with meager loot
receiving social security
disability to boot,
nonetheless can while
away unlimited numbers
of wee hours into morning
yea ideally best time to sleep,
but also most optimal,
while the missus thrashes
in bed thankfully mute
unless ya don't count
flatulence she doth toot
disrupting and derailing
train of thought
courtesy trumpeting glute.
An unexpected whistling
unlike Christopher Robin
hi ho... hi ho exiting
their wooded den
(think Snow White and
her seven dwarf men)
off to work they go to earn cents
(unbeknownst conversion into) yen
boot just enough to undergo
gastric bypass surgery
to shrink abdomen,
plus grueling boot camp regimen
guaranteeing bullseye
hit courtesy artillerymen
nsync with honing
sharp eyed acumen
joining (rather leading) civilians
carrying out coup d’etat
putsch ching aside feeble,
inept and lame
president to step up
and augment pen
ultimate last ditch effort
to halt climate change
to stave turning planet Earth
into self destructive oven.
All joking aside horrific,
née apocalyptic crisis doth loom
perhaps even unleashing mushroom,
clouds (thrown in for good measure)
encompassing entire planet
assuredly spelling doom,
where liquidation and fire sale
at all brick and mortar
stores will bloom,
(just ash at the front desk)
charcoal burnt offering skeleton crew
pointing blackened decker
index finger boom
meringue literally every black
Friday, Saturday, Sunday...
until every tomb
morrow until end of time.
She has been waiting for amount
To her survival paramount
“From my base to the next bikes I mount!
I should, therefore, a whole lot count!”
But Bad Economy is a point,
Big money collecting at gun point:
An Extorting Police at check point,
Perpetually there, self would appoint,
Much like some Pastors self with anoint;
The Thing spending at every beer joint.
Spouse Coleman had this mentioned to her,
On bikes against Cold a coat of fur:
Britain’s Winter’s about eighty ponds
Russia’s Siberia’s a price that pounds…
“And so Life to Christ The Real Amount
One needs for one’s ascent of a mount!”
she's in my mind each and everyday
I used to like wondering when she'd be back again
I think about her to keep her in sight
Time passed and it hurt to think of her
It hurt to think she wouldn't love me anymore
It hurt to think she was rotten to the core
It hurt to think, my brain had a sore
I was down to thinking her once a week
Then... she came back and it made me weak
We thought about eachother while we were holding eachother
She told me never let go and i could do was studder
I couldn't believe my ears
My love was back and she wouldn't let go
My heart was whole again and I did my best to show
That week was a dream come true
Just like a dream it had to end to soon
I kissed her, I hugged her, she massaged my neck
She held me, she loved me, all she said I kept
that last morning we spent together, we didn't sleep all night
We didn't want to let go, we didn't let go
She said she would leave me her soul until the time was right
She gave me her love and said it was mine to keep
She left that morning, I was still in a haze
Was it just a dream, those warm summer days?
We talked after that and we both thought it was unreal
I thought about her every single day
She said she loved me more than ever and I knew it was real
I haven't talked to her in over a month
I think she still loves me or am I just stuck
I think about her more than ever now, 56 times a day
I wonder, does she think about me at least once a day
I wonder and I hope but it hurts and I know.
I love her, I feel her.
Book cause I spend an inordinate amount of time reading...
out loud.
As a hypothetical argument
yours truly doth not aim
to be unfortunate recipient
of misguided, misjudged, and mislaid blame,
nevertheless I make dubious claim
and baldly recede (ha – hair ye, here ye)
from heady assertion
to make bold statement
such that literacy supersedes numeracy,
between said measurable
ambiguous, exiguous, and irriguous
confusing, perplexing, puzzling pillars
of cognitive, demonstrative, emotive,
facilitative, generative... intelligence,
hence not consonant
far from the madding crowd,
until the return of the native
and perchance ludicrous
to some above average dame,
who might be prone to exclaim
contrariwise, and squarely frame
mathematics more powerfully
(id est - greater than)
basically versus stringing words together
yielding cogent, decent,
effulgent, fluent... result
(that may not add up to a hill of beans)
crafting supreme unequaled poem
predicated upon cockamamie scribe,
(one whose unexcusable
laughable puerile mien
modestly trumpeting his outstanding talent,
hence he expects and deserves
posthumous lettered fame),
née, he already
appropriated, leveraged, wielded
volumes of his speculated worthless material
synchronized to be broadcast
immediately upon his demise
(after the grim reaper
steals dem lovely bones
to avoid self embarrassment)
avast treasure trove awaiting
distribution across webbed wide world
(including all manner
of social media platforms)
after discover re:
visa vis artificial intelligence
courtesy agency of smart machine
to custom make similar
facsimile thereof brilliant literature
where good things come to life
to emulate and evoke
mental landscape and thought processes
of one humble human
Matthew Scott Harris
while supremely, soundlessly, seamlessly,
echoing beloved refrains
from computer generated verses
that would be indistinguishable
from Joni Mitchell's
original song titled the circle game.
J-ust open your mind and think
O-f the blessings that count;
N-ovember fifth day has brought
N-ew promise in large
A-mount.
You've been dead for the same amount of time that you lived, forty-two years.
You were loved and your death devastated each and every one of your peers.
You didn't perform in all fifty states, one state that you missed was Montana.
You performed your last concert on June 26, 1977 in the state of Indiana.
Two of your hit songs were 'All Shook Up' and 'Hound Dog'.
You had great taste in motorcycles, you sure did love Hogs.
You had a wonderful life but not a life that was long.
When doctors constantly prescribed those pills, it was wrong.
You loved to give away Cadillacs, you truly had a heart of gold.
It was very sad to lose you when you were only 42 years old.
One of your friends saw you putting a hole in your foot with a drill.
When he asked you why, you said you were doing it to get more pills.
When you died on August 16, 1977, every one of your fans were in tears.
You've been dead for the same amount of time that you lived, forty-two years.
[Dedicated to Elvis A. Presley (1935-1977) who died on August 16, 1977.]
(described in ~thirty lines of rhyme)
Might help explain how fruit
full this harmless poetic brute,
(a Methacton School of hard knocks
grad), who sports astute
demeanor with ample
brew netted locks,
vaguely androgynously cute,
his trademark signature hirsute
unstyled wavy hair
tell tale characteristic,
not that I care if anyone
gives rats ass and/or hoot
bummer attire acceptable since
long unemployed and
recipient with meager loot
receiving social security
disability to boot,
nonetheless can while
away unlimited numbers
of wee hours into morning
yea ideally best time to sleep,
but also most optimal,
while the missus thrashes
in bed thankfully mute
unless ya don't count
flatulence she doth toot
disrupting and derailing
train of thought
courtesy trumpeting glute.
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