Best Alternately Poems


Premium Member Sherlock Holmes and the Mysterious Case of Appundicitis

A double sonnet in which the great detective and his faithful sidekick, Dr. Watson, alternately deduce the cause of Sherlock’s latest malady…

Part the first
Sherlock could not deduce his source of pain
at first. “Try as I might, I cannot find
the cause – is it contusion, or a sprain?
Perchance a mere psychosis of the mind?

“Yet by deduction, I’ve ruled out the plague,
consumption, smallpox, cholera, and mumps.
My symptoms, although serious, are vague –
this lack of answers has me in the dumps!

“Where’s Watson? He would have a quick prognosis –
I’ve never seen him err in all our years”.
Then! Churn of stomach yields its diagnosis
just as his friend, the good doctor, appears:

“What seems to be the problem, troubled one?”
“It’s alimentary, my dear Watson!”

Part the second
But from the learnéd doctor’s point of view,
there yet were tests and readings still to take.
He’d learnt the ill effects of poor review
and on his friend would not make that mistake.

“Stick out your tongue! Now, turn your head and cough!
Say ‘ah’. Hold this thermometer in place,
and while you’re at it, take your trousers off -
we’d better check your prostate, just in case!"

But Sherlock dashes to the water closet
in dire urgency and grave chagrin
to make a loud and liquidy deposit.
“It’s diarrhea!” Doc yells with a grin.

“How did you know?”, shouts Holmes. “How in tarnation?”
“Why, Holmes, mere process of elimination!”


written 17 Jan 2020
© John Watt  Create an image from this poem.

Premium Member Aura of Haze

wrapped in summer's
aura of haze
an almost full moon
alternately
bursts forth and withdraws
withdraws and springs forth
plays 'peek-a-boo'
with this nyctophiliac

Bluebeard

My man is Bluebeard
On this holiday for two
And I don't want to go
To spend every hour asleep or awake 
With him
His voice controlling every action
every movement moment.
I will be caught in the might
of his King Kong grip
Alternately controlling
then beseeching
The needy man child
desperate to be loved
that makes this monstrous He
That must subjugate and control the She
To leave nothing to chance
In this the field of love
To hold and crush in his hot hand
the fragile wilting bloom
Content with that death
for ownership is all.


The Colder the Winter the Warmer the Spring

The colder the winter the warmer the spring,
Where from nature’s palette life’s colors are drawn—
Though mute I must be in my heart still I sing,
For the darker the night the brighter the dawn.

The deeper the sorrow the greater the joy,
As shadows and sunlight play alternately—
No doubt or despair can this longing destroy
For my wild swan brothers soon to be free.

When misunderstanding and envy abound,
When devilish obstacles threaten me,
I must tap an inner resource profound—
For the wise will rejoice and the foolish flee.

The fiercer the tempest the sweeter the calm
That will promise a splendid rainbow to bring—
Though muffled in silence may all hear my psalm—
The colder the winter the warmer the spring.



~ Harley White


* * * * * * * * *

Song Lyric, from: One Two Three a Trilogy – Three – “The Wild Swans” – a rendering in musical theater by Harley White – based on the Fairy Tale by Hans Christian Andersen (1805—1875)

Excerpts from Trilogy – click on “Trilogy excerpts”…
[ harleywhite.awardspace.com ]

Premium Member Witch of Winter

Judging our tensile strength

As she furiously reams 

Nibbling away at our armor

Undeterred by wishes or dreams

Alternately pushing and pulling

Rending our world with her blast

Yanking us apart at the seams
© Cona Adams  Create an image from this poem.

Glutinous Rice Cake

28 March 2010

Glutinous Rice Cake

 
Just perfect to prepare on special occasion
Where bonding represents this kind of dessert
A tradition that passed through generation
Cooking this food is always a pert

Experienced to cook a mawkish sticky rice
Wherein body language is in rhythm with stirring
Endure the hardship of stirring using ladle as a device
Each family member in alternately stirring to add a zing

Cook sticky rice with the pandan leaves
Mixing coconut milk and brown sugar in a hot caldron
Stir the mixture of rice and coconut milk until it cleave
Share eating a sticky rice cake with the family with blessing the whole year round


Painting Dragons In One Stroke

“Painting Dragons in One Stroke” 


Beware of angels 
with big guns
falling for you 
they lose their wings
it’s like clipping nails 

they grow back again
eventually

the sun shine comes out to play
the rain springs a well 
in the heart good for dipping
sharp fountain pens bloodied
swords brush a new page

alternately pressing 
strong and lightly 
against the canvas of you
triumphantly sheer 
silky as feathers 

delectably drawn, 
in perilous 
Rapture Blue
delicately tasted 
as in a ceremony

novelly naked
addressed and undressed
against the glass wall
your true vulnerability 
embraced and seen through

ippitsuryu
painting dragons in one stroke

(LadyLabyrinth / 2022)




"Moonage Daydream"/ Bowie
https://youtu.be/RPUAldgS7Sg

Christmas Without a Christmas Tree

Glittery Christmas
Filled cavity on my mind
Christmas ain't yet come

**************************

Sight flickering glare
Alternately trap my eyes
But shines ain't for me

***************************

Christmas, dear Christmas
Be the present of my tears
Tiny hug in missed

****************************

A tree full of lights
Shimmered warm, deep on my cries
Sad memories blinked

****************************

Pretty past inhaled
When time puts togetherness
Now just three of us

****************************

New family tree
The Santa's gift as mercy
God truly blessed me

Attributes of Being Average

(alternately titled one me silly more till manufactured 
from go win addle American 
non refundable private parts) 

each set of twenty three chromosomes 
the basic biological building blocks
of life came out cervix 
when second hand of analog clocks 

barely and scarcely swept across dial,
wrought offspring appearance 
as a pier a docks
closely resembling a monkey 

perhaps...hmm...
maybe mother mated with a chimp 
assimilating chromosomal flox 
genetic combination brought about add hocks 

viz bouncing baby boy skinny and fair game 
as a pluperfect future target for jocks
when I took first gasp of air sputtered 
like an old engine that knocks,

now just easing into ma deuce score 
and xix year with hair reed locks 
twittering, snorting, rattling nonetheless 
became precious human dependent 

with mat chew anti body mox
see for father and mother 
to care despite expelling nox
shuss gas out derriere, which profuse flatulence 

natural immunization 
kept away infected kids with pox
nicknamed little buttock blaster 
now sits in a comfy chair and rocks

reminiscing about boyhood 
and a pooch named Socs
who told time applying faux paws vox
like ­tum make sounds resembling tick tocks

Nowadays every potential mom and dad 
disappointed unless offspring(s) feverish follow fad
decreeing qualified as gifted birth of lass or lad 
go wing great lengths to prod and push 
progeny until a genius to be had
rather tubby thankful and gratefully glad

regaling robust surprise 
packaged traits of yore 
inheriting genetics descended 
when early apes did de tour 

terrestrial virgin earth 
anatomically complete store 
reed awesomely astounding miracle from spore
sized fertilized ovum (healthy 
and sound baby boy or girl) hood roar 

if lionized, which feline bellow mew might mean 
change my dye ya pore
and pamper me sum more
gnome hatter wailing mama or papa ignore
thence nurturing baby pipes por favor
kinship knits omnipotent bond evermore
where tis instinctual to adore.

Presidential Inauguration 2017 - Poetic Screed - Part1

Fast as an atomic banshee, he roils sacred halls 
of White House clutches levers with brass balls
American powers remain unrestrained when he calls
Armada to exorcise imagine aery dragons, 
   he inarticulately falls
non-communicative, faux eruditely generative, 
   and heartily galls
toward this introspective kickstarter male, 
   and most likely others he appalls.
-------------------------------------------------
My inner guru hankers to share voice 
   amidst increasing din 
and clamors in reaction to insidious machinations fin
hushed via Machiavellian offal prince, 
   who unleashes clout with Cheshire grin
unconcerned about population, chaste, 
   from their wells Fargo wing. 
*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *             
   Most every citizen banker, and kin
stared down vis a vis fierce-some intimations 
   catapult escalating, spin
laughing at rigged voting outlook 
   gratefully inflicts populace with monstrous win 
   doomsday soldiers - 
   art of the deal book not writ by said urchin.
-------------------------------------------------
Though regularly affiliated with top notch 
kudos to virtual soapbox platform 
   re: all poetry to express Bing averse 
toward ill feted Barron settlement 
   of United States government tossed like scotch
on thar hocks, thus an uneasy angst 
   also invisibly grabs me by the crotch
cuz das Trump power monger, 
   I fear rubric of democracy, he will botch!
-------------------------------------------------
This poem alternately titled - 
   harbinger of political debacle wolf find antipode 
where toxic brew at crack of 12 a.m. 
 January 20th 2017 doth bode  
doctored pregnant swollen tidal anarchistic military toad
deeds sheepishly shape into battalions 
   in tandem - fraternal order of police erode
Civilian protesters unite with ordinary citizen bankers 
 crowdsource sing metallic ca clash to goad

The Reign of Stormy Daniels

alternately titled: breast damned fallacy hi-jinxed!

In her “60 Minutes” interview aired
Sunday (March 26th, 2018),
the **** star known within red district
as Stormy Daniels bared
her "naked lady" version

swearing oath of honesty,
she emphatically dick cleared
on a stack of video nasties, 
and x-rated 'zines
now she can live rest of life

guilt free offloading
hush money endeared
a posteriori into infinitely
jesting bordello loop

with calmly enchanting bug eyed,
drooling media hounds,
whose nostrils flared
squelching the trumpeting Don,

who maliciously glared
for traitorously breaching
“genital man's agreement”),
playing the (sock it to him role
of goody two shoes)
christened Stephanie Clifford)

shaggy long haired
pseudo Mayflower madam averred
to right justice in sought after
condom free nation,
where the turkey
ought tubby national bird

mandating free codicil
to second amendment as of furred
thus, that ass hide from right to bear arms
premature sea r man ejaculation
of Peter ought to be heard

where sudden sound
sans pubis seams burst 
jock strapped unseen bulging Johnson's 
onslaught hail of expletives cursed
out the mouth of salty sailor spewing Prez,
hook halled for a recess first
and foremost before
questioning resumed
     automatically immersed

within tawdry tabloid pulp pit
whore sing Bacchanalian refused to quit
particularly when groin
set zipper (flimsy – obviously,

NOT put thru linkedin
locked down rigorous paces
realized, when pry vet eyelit 
of trouser snake split)

yielding singular (nada so sterling)
gamut gallimaufry variegated erector set
with singular bulbous
ram rod rocket like trivet.

Das Capital Tarnished Valentine

(alternately known as the Doubting Thomas Crown 
Taj Mahal Cupid Affair)
-  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -   -  -  -
Fortunate (for me) thee bona fide "FAKE" Cupid
(aka Decoy Donald Duck
and side kickstarter Jay Rad,
colluded donning one alias,
which (former and latter)

amounted tube bing disguised incognito
as the cingular "Ivan Ha Bea Robber Baron),"
while same above placed
their System Of A Down on high alert
whereby, they unwittingly, fortunately, 
and accidentally discerned disquieting "noise"

i.e. static electronic crackling
purportedly from nemesis, asper sans above
whereby broadcasters colluded
confusingly, congruously, and convincingly
as thee infamous digital (duplicity)
faux "Big Mac" Trump.

The chalkboard scratching, hair sprayed bouffant,
and knuckle crackling
appeared tubby the handiwork cleverly disguised
(as tinpot dictator antics of Moscow's version,

sans Putin on the ritz),
which decrypted garble (a fluke) as iterated above
strongly emanating via polygamous,
prestigious, and pseudonymous
pull no punches ploy

innocently convincing feigned
duo code named "Ashley Madison and Bert"
disclosing (when uncovered),
a heartless conspiracy in concert

with Sesame Street studded lesser known Muppets
pretending tubby oil tycoon Bedouins
intent to fleece "sensitive"
top secret military defense contracts,

which Russian motley crue ace double agents
intended this act of espionage thence sabotage
feted as a Black Sabbath Lupercalia feint
not for the faint hearted clubby fete

where Cupid given free rule of the roost
allowing, enabling and proffering
Cyrillic chattering Cherubim

hook cooked United States "figurative goose"
lock, stock and barrel, which stratagem
captured president unawares
and did significantly boost

Eastern Bloc reconnaissance (on par
with the Philadelphia Eagles
winning 2018 Super Bowl LII
which surprise clenching championship
wrought frenzied hoopla, gala, and bacchanalia
where barenaked ladies 

cavorted nsync with beastie boys,
whence City of Brotherly love hoopla found
nearly every man, woman and child soused
(analogous to each person garnering
an early Sainted Patrick's pot of gold.

Random Acts of Kindness

(alternately titled “How art thou dear reader?”)

(Inexplicably triggers domino effect
and doth indirect
lee send favorable
     ripples vibrantly unchecked.)
vagaries of an uncertain
     today or tomorrow
     excites this scribe,
     with a whim

analogous to sensational leitmotifs
     introducing note worthy
     composition melody,
     and/or lyric with vim
and vivacity, particularly
     to avoid behavior
     being predicable, and also
     (more importantly for)

     to partake of the vast trim
ming of life, (not just those
     reserved for holiday time),
     where every day provides
     an opportunity, no matter slim,
and/or fat chance to bring,
     (or deliver a smile)
     via friendly gesture accompanied

     with a kind word
     such as "hello,"
cuz no cost involved being friendly
     to a self absorbed passersby
     alighting, and enabling
stark contrast day, sans
     gloom and doom uttering,
     an innocuously neutral

     greeting to bring
a dollop of good
     day (not simply,
     those festive occasions
     (mainly and most 
     optimally, favorably,
     and conveniently during)
Thanksgiving, and/or Christmas,

     but any given evening
no matter the season if only to fling,
(albeit verbally) one or more glee
full spontaneous vocalization -
     (USDA NON GMO,
     gluten and monosodiumglutimate free)
surprising yourself (myself

     in this case) voluntarily prithee
boost interpersonal 
     social awkwardness,
     perhaps even offering
     to lend a helping hand re
garding circumstance,
     where an individual
     might be contending
 
     with something obviously
beastly, heavy, and/or
     unwieldy to manage
despite the outcome, where
     no response 
     might be forthcoming,
maybe experiencing feeling
snubbed without letting
     air of indifference
     (from recipient) sting!

Roundup Time At the Fake Not Okay Corral

(alternately titled: ah me go march'n home on derange)

I'll play the devil's advocate, yet
prepare a stance with pitchfork
     against misinterpreted faux attempt
     to describe, how whet
d'ya column re: immigration officials coe vet

patrol, police, and poison tranquil casa blanca
     where killer attack dogs fiendishly pin set
     ting sharp fangs at jugular vein of respectful,
     dutiful, and blissful (or at least

     prior to being sniffed out) innocent
     long time laborer on American soil now get
     ting Das Boot to their unfamiliar Motherland
     (despite living social
     as law abiding righteous folks) fret

full, cuz unfairly punished, and
     cruelly deported, dispirited, doomed
     pained visage non verbally articulates
     at un war rented deportation you bet!

with just a flick of the wrist
and alien hated, pigheaded,
     and xenophobic ventriloquist
bring back the Alien and Sedition Acts 

     with a Trumpeting Latina, Hispanic, 
     and for good measure Mulatto twist,  
     where original writ (signed into law 
     by President John Adams in 1798), 
     historical footnote, aye cannot resist

spooking (like a ghost), those pee pill 
     born south of the border pooped and pissed
in potties of this proud country, sans free and brave 
     now frightfully get flushed out 

glad to feign dis guise 
     as one among select Geronimo cadre 
     we henchman lubricate 
     wheels of injustice myst
     tuff hie hiding dark shadows 
     (along the edge of night) 

     thence paddy wagon comes 
     to screeching halt nabbing 
     an "illegal alien" name on hit list 
code word "bag dad" (biggest quarry)
     and score a win
     for Barren Trump Tah Mahal Incorporated

impossible mission special ops sentry slithers as trained
     fearless to shackle wetback ranked big hest
catch also including booby prize,
     as you correctly guessed.

Premium Member Teaching Me a Lesson

You think you’re teaching me a lesson
By what you say….or alternately by your silence
You think you are teaching me how to behave
Or what to think
Or what to say

Teacher, I don’t want to learn
The lessons that you teach
You have imbued them
With your own philosophy
Of life 
The lessons are biased
Tainted
Jaded
Full of mind control techniques
And propaganda
The hidden agenda is clear
You want me in subjugation
To your wishes
And whims
Not a person in my own right
With a thinking, reasoning ability

Teacher, I can teach you a lesson or two
About true love
And life
About mystery
and fantasy
About passion
And satisfaction
About superiority
And mediocraty
About domination
and submission
About the “live and let live” policy

Teacher, most of all
I want to teach you
TO LOVE...
To love with no strings attached
To love without constraint
To love without demanding obeisance
To love without conditions
To love because of love

Teacher….you need to learn
A lesson or two
About love, life, and sacrifice
Desire, Need, and Paradise
Tell me, Teacher, are you willing...
To let me teach?

Eileen Manassian Ghali

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