Best Aer Poems


Premium Member Funny Kid's Chihuahua Limerick

There once was a Chihuahua named Hairy
Wispy as air, white his hair, and scary
Like a ghost he'd appear
Quiet, soft as cashmere
Sometimes it seems he's dropped from the aerie 

aerie( aer-y or ey-rie) 1.  a lofty nest of any bird...2.   a house, fortress, or the like. located high on a hill or mountain

Inspired by: Team Poetry Soup
Contest: Funny Kid's Poem Contest
Written: October 09, 2015

Premium Member Irish Lass

I want to go across the sea to Dublin.
Immediately is when my journey must begin.
There is a pretty Irish lass waiting for me there.
She has cool blue eyes and lovely red hair.
Here in the states, I miss her all the while.
The lady waits for my return to the Emerald Isle.
My woman is really a great beauty to see.
She gets me higher than a shot of Irish whiskey.
I want to book my Aer Lingus flight.
Over the ocean is where I will fly overnight.
I will arrive at Dublin’s airport before sunrise.
I cannot wait to gaze into those blue eyes.
I want to hug and kiss her, and take her by the hand.
Big 747, I am in a hurry to get to Ireland.

Ode To a Dead Pilot

Ode To A Dead Pilot
   
 
  The time to sioux for peace is before the first shot is fired.
Weapons of destruction aer better turned around.
Point them at the darkness and then frown.
Fighting is for ^A^ngels and much nobler sorts than yew.
A Soldier in his britches needs a glory to behold; 
other than the flag of his own country I am told.
Place your thoughts above on things where Christ
does dwell, and walk on streets of GOLD. 
Even in your dreams and memories it will help you to grow old.
There was once a MAN who was once a boy.
He played with toys, and after graduation then He heard: 
Great engines sucking air into intakes, 
and the expelling of the air again to reach a multi-colored
transfer pointe and sometimes after running out of fuel
a man does NOT bail out...
but takes his planethopping function into the DEAD terrian.
Avoiding populated areas, to kill a cactus NOT a populas.
When that MAN is inn his Heaven and rewards come due.
I want to hear everyone in Heaven say, 
'He was a boy getting into that aeroplane, but he
became a MAN today.
I saw several of my men turn fear away from populated places, 
as they crashed and died in flame into the desert cactus, 
to ensure the best proclivity of mass production.
The wreckage of an aeroplane. 

Charles Hice


The Apple Tree Greed

the apple tree greed 
the apple tree greed 

he has an apple a green apple 
he is the only person in this room 
with a green apple 
suppose suppose NOW 
he has MORE of those at home 
WHY he has a GREEN APPLE tree 
In his backyard no WAIT 
He has a vineyard behind his chapeau 
And he makes green apple wine 
And he sells it to the BOONES FARM people 
And they make BOONES FARM green apple wine 
And the whole city is soon sick 
The children ralf and barf and ralf again 
There is no more end to the men 
Drinking all the green apple wine 
To make this ONE person rich 
He never offered me any of his wine 
Eyes never drink of alcoholic beverage 
Eye have juices and tea and a soda please 
I'm just full of good intentions 
Picking green apples in my mind and eating way too many 
Having a green apple with mye lunch of poetical decay 
WAIT he left and YES he took the green apple core with him 
Not leaving me a bite not wanting me to taste the pleasure 
of his mite. Why eye understand him greedy is his name 
the green apple hoarder has so many apples now his wine cellar is so full and 
his larders aer so rich he does save the stems and seeds to plant again in 
ground so rich and he chews on this green apple while he watches MTV in 
selfish hedonistacal revenge while eye have no green apple stuck between my 
teeth OH bliss oh strang decay my teeth at least aer happier today he took the 
core away he left me all alone im appleless today im happier to say no song is 
being sung of little apples of the green variety been hung oh see the tree how big 
its grown the apples have been lost too long and they fall in misery from 
branches of decay to rot to rot to rot upon the vineyard floor there is no apple wine 
no more the green variety is gone they drink it only read and red is the color of the 
wine in cups so full of color there in plates so heaped of agony with applesauces 
vailiantly piled higher then the sky.

Forking River Dam, Illinois

Forking River Dam, Illinois

Forking River 
 
CharlaXFabels 
 
Forking Dam 
 
Forking,Ill. 
 
189 

John M went camping and took his friend Timmy. Off they went to the Forking River Dam. They 
went to the Forking Campground near the Forking Dam. They decided to visit the Forking City. 
They had to go to the Forking Market. It was near the Forking Gas Station closer to the
furcating 
Forking River bending near the Forking swamp turning into the Forking Quicksanding place 
there where they turned off the Main Forking Road. They turned Forking right there. There
is a 
Forking left turn as well but they had to get to the Forking Store. They bought some
Forking Beer 
made in the Forking Brewery. They were still in Illinois. Forking, Ill. Ill is the
abbreviation for 
Illinois, so we aer all Forking, Ill. For now. The men were Forking camping so they bought
some 
Forking beans made at the Forking beanery. The Forking Meat CO. provided. The Olympic 
branch of the Mount Olympus Water CO. Donated the Forking Water. They went to the Forking 
River Motel to steal the soap and the towels. They paid for the room and took two Forking Dam 
showers. They kept the Forking Dam Ashtray. It has a picture of the Forking Dam River. The 
Forking Dam Police were searching for the Forking Dam Campground to arrest the Forking 
men. They were not from Forking at all but just out of townies they had come to Forking
Dam to 
Fish for Forking Fish. They went to the Forking Boat Dock and rented a Forking Boat the
Indian 
Man in charge of the Forking Boat Dock said you out of townies speak with Forking tongue. But 
money green in Forking Dam. Good to see you Forking men. The Men in Forking Dam City are 
Forking gay. The Forking City Future Club is Oddfellows Hall. 
Eye am Forking, Ill. From all that Forking Fish they gave to me the nibbles and the bites
the love 
all tied up in Forking Ville. They said that visit day is FrYdaY at the Forking Prison
Institution they 
have a Forking Fish fry for religion they want me to go to Forking, Ill. And visit.

Love Ewe and Blue

love ewe and blue 

aer rhyming words true
there is always inflection and poor attitude
limits of knowledge above snobbish refrains
trains run on time only in the movies
movies run on time only in a small town
there is very few movies shown on trains
blue can be an attitude blue can be a heart
love you can be used to start a heart apart from you
as you watch the blue southern train depart
from the blue stunted depot with the board walk floor
the little blue conductor yelling all aboard her
as the train takes the love and makes your attitude blue
soup mix tastes so wordy so blue so true and good
with a doubly heaping helping of a love ewe attitude


Earth In Me

So much water, so much iron
Alas, no gold, but copper by the ion
Glows in my skin late summer days
And tastes of blood and flint and maize


Taste my salt, my spit, my hair
Breath my tender air, my mollis aer
Anoint me with a cloak of sweat
And with my sword I will beget


The earthy side of me, you see
Nickel, zinc, ah, yet no mercury
Take my dirt, my earth, my stones
Build a castle with my bones.

21Mar14

Preimmenance

PreImmenance
God is not an alien or an artificial intelligence he is a perfect being not created just a 
constantly moving force like the impossible perpetual motion machine the inventors allways 
aer trying to reinvent only already done He could be a cow although its not likely He could sit 
inside a Dove and stay there constantly but then He would miss so many other things eye 
think he does the GOD thing constantly the focus of attention on the Throne where he does 
sit. When we humans (eye include the android races) worship GOD we have a tendency to 
press our hands together in a paroday of clapping but silently we point them up but cast our 
eyes down to the ground or rug there is a certainty we fear the GOD that we need help from. 
Pre means before Immenace in this context means the persona or image or being or just 
say person. In the person of one Jesus Christ we have three personas such as Father Son 
and Holy Spirit. It does not say that the Holy Spirit is female or male but spirit is sexless so 
we can assume that Jesus was a male child brought up in the Jewish religion and that the 
Father image the Anchient of Days the GOD we all think of as a Bearded man is the Father of 
Jesus in the Spirit of Christ. Three persons in one being. PreImmenace is the idea that Jesus 
created the Earth at the moment of Earths Birth in the Form of GOD in the Spirit of the 
Father and the Spirit of the Son. Life as a triplet person Enthroned and esconsed as the ruler 
of the Universe. Having been there before there was  anything to see or created. He will be 
there after this creation is disposed of and a new generation is concieved. Take the fact that 
a GOD would learn from his mistakes and not create the sameness we have now but make it 
better somehow. Then apply the thinking that makes better people of us all and realize he 
changes us to help us live there now inside the heart not until the physical is changed can we 
actually see GOD. But there is one way. Turn around the next time you attend your church 
and smile and look closely at the person in the very next aisle over. Chances are you just 
saw GOD in his preimmenance.

Cadd

@2Twenty0
CharlaXTitles
CADD
CharlaXAgainstDrunkDrivers
Puke all over the seat and get some on your dogs head 
and a little on the wife’s  purse get her good 
and Madd at yew so she will take the car keys 
and drop them in the piranha pool to keep 
the control of the car away from yew. 
DO not ever try to drive the car like that again. 
Be my friend let the motor idle when the belly 
has an idol in the center of your disgusting 
fatness leave the driving to the women 
or call the rental. Drinking is a disease 
of the mind heart liver central being alcoholic yew. 
It is now not only whiskey but people drugging 
swagging smoking of the left handed Turkish variety 
just puffing passing smoking inhaling 
like a Clinton Will. Stronger measures now aer 
needed to stop the added danger of a high 
mucky muck brown frame toker from totaling 
the soccer van of Mother. There is station wagons 
on the road this mourning with whiskey bumps 
all over them the women drivers not exempt 
from hitting poles and other cars 
and then my friend there is the LAW of Johnny 
combined to probable cause. When the police man shines 
his light inside the car and sees at least thirteen 
empty beer bottles laying in the back seat empty 
he has a right to ask ewe iff ewe aer recycling them 
or drinking. A road test complete with breathalyzer 
please make them touch the nose 
never mind the sneezes please.

Cadd Part Two2

"Vision Zero" -- no more deaths from highway accidents. The idea was born in Sweden, where it's had spectacular success in reducing traffic fatalities. Now zeroing out all traffic fatalities must become an explicit U.S. and worldwide goal. Otherwise we have no prospect of taming the appalling roadway death toll -- 42,000 lives lost yearly in the United States, close to 1.2 million worldwide. THE LAW IS STATED FOR EACH AND EVERY DIFFERENT STATE IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.
 › Alabama DUI Law
 › Alaska DWI Law
 › Arizona DUI Law
 › Arkansas DWI Law

 › California DUI Law
 › Colorado DUI Law
 › Connecticut DUI Law
 › Delaware DUI Law

 › Florida DUI Law
 › Georgia DUI Law
 › Hawaii DUI Law
 › Idaho DUI Law

 › Illinois DUI Law
 › Indiana OWI Law
 › Iowa OWI Law
 › Kansas DUI Law

 › Kentucky DUI Law
 › Louisiana DWI Law
 › Maine OUI Law
 › Maryland DUI Law

 › Massachusetts OUI / DUI Law
 › Michigan DUI Law
 › Minnesota DWI Law
 › Mississippi DUI Law

 › Missouri DWI Law
 › Montana DUI Law
 › Nebraska DWI Law
 › Nevada DUI Law

 › New Hampshire DUI Law
 › New Jersey DWI Law 
 › New Mexico DUI Law
 › New York DWI Law

 › North Carolina DWI Law
 › North Dakota DUI Law
 › Ohio DUI Law
 › Oklahoma DUI Law

 › Oregon DUII Law
 › Pennsylvania DUI / DAI Law
 › Rhode Island OUI Law
 › South Carolina DUI Law

 › South Dakota DUI Law
 › Tennessee DUI Law
 › Texas DWI Law
 › Utah DUI Law

 › Vermont DUI Law
 › Virginia DUI Law
 › Washington DUI Law
 › District of Columbia DWI Law

 › West Virginia DUI Law
 › Wisconsin OWI Law
 › Wyoming DUI Law

It is hard to do the will of GOD and judge not a brother for what he eats or drinks but they THE LAW aer seeming smarter for they judge no content but amounts thereof. This is number twenty in my CharlaXTitles Cadd.

138

138 
138 
 
 
 
CharlaXFabels 
 
CharlaXSonnetta 


I 

There is my holdings my vineyards in Franco 
The eye waves flies off of his wine 
While making millions of euro dollars 
While ewe aer always reining Qyeen 
The kisses lemone oh so sweet 
Only in my fantasy wine is never sour 
 Away the hour enthrall love ewe 
CharlaX Millions making fables true bend 
Holding love above the real life 
Holding love inside the inside 
Holding love upon the morrow 
Holding love without mye sorrow 
Holding love to be the marrow 
Holding love above the dollar. 

II 

The grapes were used though lemone added mix 
A thing unheard in all the land 
The regent came to me anon to ask 
CharlaX why the wine would sec sit 
Tis for the love violette eye bend 
The lemone fragrance doth remind the eye 
The wine is never bitter then 
The love much more imported avec bien 
Love holding more than love can tell 
Love holding odoring the smell 
Love holding like the fetterments 
Love holding like a taste of her 
Love holding only love anon 
Love holding after we aer gone. 

III 

There is a mission now upon the corner 
Near the water they do stay there 
All the homeless wander there they live safe 
They have laoaves fishes sec vino 
No one hungars no ones cold 
No one misses world so bolder older 
No worldly pleasuer can compare 
Working harder now than ever fables quake 
Hold me loving hold me closer 
Hold me loving je embrasser 
Hold me magistrate ragon Qyeen 
Hold me merry happily long 
Hold me sensually loving 
Ruling the vineyard sun love song

Vegans and Vegaterians

Vegans and Vegaterians 
Half-baked lies and friendly flies , is what most poor people eat. 
Lemon drops and candy and choclate kisses aer too sweet. 
Eye eat MEAT.I like the burgers AND the dogs, 
sandwiches of all kinds , but BEEF is best for me. 
Chicken I have found elimanates from me, 
I place it on the ground,when eye am early bound for the Bus Sun Tran. 
The Chicken finds no place in me. 
It does not slide away; but drops from me almost perfectly, 
in the form of one hard cylinder. 
My brother always tells me , Chicken would be the main course 
iff he could have chicken every day. 
He is still a villager. 
I was never guilty of being part of my own family, 
whatever I had always belonged to me myself and eye, 
and now yew tew. 
Eye have to feed all four of me. 
It takes a lot of meat,and sometimes a little bread instead, 
to feed the whole of me. 
Eye am dead. 
That death is certain eye no longer fear. 
My own destruction will just aid me in my journey to the Heaven. 
Simple minds aer best,and ladies finery aer best, 
carrotts and celery and spinach is best, 
and corn and beans is the best substitute for the meat. 
Daniel in the Lions Den,was eating PUCE , a vegetable. 
He was a Vegan disdaining the King`s venison. 
He could not and would not face corruption. 
Astounded by the Revelation , the Book Of Daniel tells 
of nations , torn asunder by the sword, 
plundered by the soldiers eating meat. 
Not the Vegans or the Vegaterians. 
Non-pulsed is what I am when I am eating meat. 
Daniel of the Bible is a Vegan to all the Vegaterians. 
They have no meat , and no corruption.

Spam Poem

SPAMming is now a way of life, 
eye just decided those people aer alive. 
When you delete SPAM messages they still survive. 
The people silly not the messages. 
I meant the silly people of course not ewe. 
Of course ewe dew survive. Now wait where was eye? 
SPAM. We aer NOT trying to murder them just to avoid 
the curcumstantial evidence of mis-directed information 
and robotic responses found so hard to manage in e-mail. 
SPAM. We call it SPAM. SPAM. 
Why? eye don~t know but the namme is deserved. 
Someone is actually and factually driving a real car 
to an office. Sitting in a chair in a red dress. 
Turning her computor mouse toward my address. 
SPAM. OH NO. 
I am sent another SPAM to my e-mail. 
GOD help US. 
Oh it is OKAY. 
Eye have a TOOL-BAR. 
Automatic-delete-delete-delete-beep. 
SPAM. 
Who are you OH woman of SPAM. 
Wait eye don~t hate you, 
Thank you for sending me SOME. 
SPAM. 
I love you but your message MUST go. 
Automatic-delete-beep. 
OH NO

Tall Tree

TALL TREE 

Tall Tree 
She is not short this lady she is not so VERY tall to out shine me she loves me 
this eye  knoe she clearly knoes 
She clearly knoes eye am a short white man this is no puppy love she even 
knoes eye am religious and she makes references to GOD and this is pleasing 
unto me this religousness inside of TALL TREE she love me. 
There aer not too many creek Indian lady who make eye at me 
this one eye will keep her as iff we married back when we met 
the many people that eye have known the sins and aggravations 
just seem to disappear when eye have my sweetY heart again 
she is the tall creek Indian maiden pocahuntus called Tall Tree. 
She is the only Valentine for me.

84

84

CharlaXFabels

BOB Newhart

Remembrandts


Eye remember two of his stories eye will relate them first the way that eye 
remember them we had a recorded message (a vinyl record) player. 

Remembrandt one: He said this is a ROBOT voice in kind of a low insistent 
monotonically dialogue. 

ROBOT: come in and sit down Human.
ROBOT: Your work has been suffering a lot lately and we are going to have to let 
you go:
This has been a recorded message.
This last was emphasized by staccato emphasis on each word he spit it out like 
a machined player. 

Remembrandt: Ants is People on the Ground
The man got on the airplane and looked out the window to the ground.
The people down there look just like ants idint it amazing.
The other airliner said Those AER ants you IDIOT we havn’t taken off yet.

Oh wow Remembrandt three: eye just remembered another one.
The Preacher and the giver the airliner and the preacher.
The man looked out at the wing and it was on fire and he began to offer up 
sacrifices to the lord LORD he said if this plane reaches the ground safely eye 
will give yew half of everything eye own.
The plane leveled off smooth and the fire on the wing went out and the plane 
landed safe.
The man was soon talking to the preacher.
He said MY good man eye heard what yew said on that plane yew said yew was 
giving half of everything yew own to the LORD and eye knoe that YEW aer gonna 
start right now? it was in the form of a question. NO preacher the man said eye 
just made HIM a better deal he said EYE told the LORD if eye ever get back on 
another one then HE can have it all.
Remembrandts of the Newhart.

http://www.rhapsody.com/bobnewhart

Copy and Past this one in search.

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