Willingness alive
reaches upwards seeking light
bravely choosing change—
unafraid of exposure
to blaze of introspection
It knows direction,
knows where it must go and when
reaching up, striving—
being both humble and brave
yielding, but so resolute
Seeking a small crack
that lets the light come inside
so shadows fall back
so fear turns into wisdom—
with the will making its hay
All coalesce—
seed, branch, root, twig, stem, and leaf,
bending into light
growing with courage and grace
with willingness on the way
Repeating myself
Over and over and over again
You can’t begin to imagine the pain.
The anguish.
The derelict feelings born of a journey
To better thyself.
To become the best version of me
A version forged in solitude.
I scream into the silence,
And I cry like a ghost in a glass house
Visible, but unheard.
Seen, but not felt.
Do they care?
About this version of me
This loathing of life,
This obsession to become
Everything they said I couldn’t?
Let me make it clear:
I. Will. Endure.
In spite of them.
In spite of the silence.
In spite of the lack of applause.
In spite of the hate.
The anguish.
The sorrow.
So I say unto you
You who don’t want to see your loved ones win:
You sit still while the chosen move.
You call effort "too much"
While they make it look easy.
You sleep because you're tired of trying.
I sleep because I burned myself alive in effort.
I don’t rest because I’m lazy
I rest because I fight every single day
To outwork, outthink, outperform
EVERY. LAST. DOUBT.
Let me show you a world
Where execution is my art.
Where performance is my ritual.
Where there is
No stop.
No quit.
No giving in.
Never.
NEVER.
NEVER AGAIN.
ability to learn-desire to succeed
leave the cell phone at home
pack a quick lunch
park the stress behind
bring your willingness to the beach
willing to have a terrific day
of silence and meditation
I will always resolve to outrun the next crisis.
I will sometimes incur trauma out of desperation.
I will never allow my essence to be separated even as my consciousness splits.
I will forever be in limbo in my quest to independence.
I will one day stop trying to be a martyr-
As if my sacrifice will lead to a cure.
Not all men are bad.
Not all think with their narcissistic egos.
Some men have hearts some women know nothing about.
Some men just want to be heard.
But when they are told to just suck it up & be a man.
It hinders them.
It hides them.
Are you actually empathetic enough to listen to them?
Or have you too been blinded by your own willingness to feel?
I am willing to forgive because I trust in God to forgive me thus
7/16/20
written words by James Edward Lee Sr.© 2020
I've been wild and crazy
A loose goose on the rampage
I partied and pleasured
And played
Rolled time up in a tight coil
Squeezing everything out
Tied the knot firmer
Stretched to the limit
Struggled wholeheartedly
With every endeavor
Pushed to my limit
Like a steamroller
Straightening and smoothing
The road ahead of me
Never looking back
Closing all the doors behind me
Before crossing the next bridge to burn
And turning the next corner
Rocking the boogie of bash
Now
Older worn and riddled
No desire - No regrets
Fastened and trussed in old blue PJ's
Watching the birds flicker
Wafting the sweet scented flowers
Taking in the air
Sitting on the same road
Not moving
This fidgety gray curmudgeon
Rocking in my chair
Still a mover and shaker
With many, many stories to share
April 26, 2020
Wild Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Anthony Slausin
2 cups of cream cheese
1 cup of a sharp (pungent) goats cheese
1 cup of toasted hazelnuts
1/4 cup of slithered almonds
1/2 cup of cocoa
4 tablespoons vanilla
1&1/2 cups of sugar
1/4 cup of chopped dried cherries
4 tablespoons of raspberry liqueur
a pound cake cooked in a ringed Bundt pan
3 cups of a frosting
mix ingredents together and mix until smooth and sugar is dissolved. cut bunt cake in half, and hollow parts, of it to create a space to put the cheese mixture,.
fill with chees mixture and place the top to the bottom.
frost the cake and allow the frosting to slightly harden.
First a feather,
Then a fruit, a hard one,
And then a stone,
A bigger one, then boulders,
Rolling over one another,
There was no use fleeing,
Or rather I did not want to,
So I bled, and I was crushed,
Somehow it never hurt!
to not be grumpy
even when it is in the
air-no status quo
* angel card series # 17
Ready to forget,
burning every memory
with this swollen wrath;
if I took it to my grave
unrest would be my sure curse!
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