Short Uncle Joe Poems

Uncle Joe 

Here lies my old Uncle Joe.
We sure weren’t sad to see him go.
He ripped off everyone he met.
Now his poor wife must pay his debt.

4/20/19...

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My Uncle Joe loved to engage in tickling
Especially young boys, it was sickening,
We wondered about him,
Hanging out at the gym
'Till he started openly soliciting!...

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Uncle Joe spends his days on death row,
for killing his best friend and Aunt Flo.
He found them in bed,
then filled them with lead.
Losing a friend hurts, don't you know?




3/28/20...

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   Neither bells rang
     nor rifles sounded
   The transition quiet
     neither looting nor riots

   A veritable coup
     pulled off by old pros ~ 
   helpless, pinned to the ground
     Cry ‘Uncle,’ Joe, it’s time to go
...

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We rallied around and sang carols
Everything felt magical and alive
We drank hot cocoa and ate cookies
Before the Christmas Tree

Before the skaters go
Let’s give them their gifts suggested Uncle Joe
They stayed and sang carols with us
Christmas season was in full swing...

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TEACH ME TO ROW


     Boats
     resting
     on the shore,
     retired old.
     Hold tall tales of Father's minnow that got away.
     Teach me how to row slow please, Uncle Joe.
     Mom's kayak glides
     Sunset rides
     Us.

   Sponsor, Eve Roper
   Double Tetractys
   9/5/2021...

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NATURAL   AND   BEYOND


(Haiku)

Noble tree critter
Never feels proud or bitter
No epigram fitter




(Senryu)

Looks like uncle Joe?
Each is a handsome so-and-so
Could be God’s plan you know


. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Written for John Freeman’s  Contest   “Natural and Beyond!!”...

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Dora Darling drives from Texas to L.A.
In her brand-new shocking pink corvette
Eighteen and in trouble, with a will and a way
In relief, the procedure is set

Brenda Johnson's good 'ol Uncle Joe
Violently forces his body upon her
fourteen and pregnant, broke, broken, and sad
Half mad with grief and nowhere to go

6/27/22...

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My toes are often sheepheaded at best
Their minds invisible, often at rest
But when I dropped an I-pad on them
They came awake with angry vigor and vim

I had no idea that a toe could hurt so
It swelled up like July corn that continued to grow
I was yelling in pain, oh, me, oh, my, oh!”
Hoping to alert my nearly deaf uncle Joe....

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Family movies –
Bore, bore, bore!
Haven’t I seen
This program before?

Voices babbling,
Musical tunes,
No one listening,
Birthday balloons!

Presents unwrapping,
There’s Uncle Joe.
No, it’s his brother!
And there’s little Flo!

The baby’s so cute –
She’s got a new tooth.
There’s this one and that one –
Enough now, forsooth!!

We lived it, enjoyed it,
And had a great time.
But hours of it over
And over’s a crime!...

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Laughing coogie woogie and boogie moogie wee
Were in the best of circumstances, said McGoogle Tee.
I was not sure what they were, but pretended to know
One looked like a deranged snail, with teeth like Uncle Joe

Other one was a miniature dwarf type guy with hair of white
The kind you see crawl out from rocks on a drinking Friday night.
Coogie Woogie and Boogie Moogie wee were important to me.
Because they were giving out candy bars with apricot tea....

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Hillbilly Music
Grandpa got the boys to gather at night.
Grandpa on the fiddle is so sweet.
Old Pa on the big bass can really make it sing.
Uncle joe plays a mean wash tube.
While I slap the knees with my spoons.
The sound of old rocky top 
Brings the valley to the hills.
We play all night long 
As the sing the songs.
The hills do rock to the hillbilly sound. 
Of nothing can be finer the being in Carolina.
Hillbilly music is the sweetness of the hills....

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 Men may come and men may go
But none do I love like my Uncle Joe
He boosts my spirits and strokes my ego
He's my sweet patootie, Uncle Joe.

He tells me I'm beautiful every day
Even if, in reality, I'm in disarray
He prays for me nightly without fail
I know when he does, good things will prevail.

So, men may come and men may go
But none do I love like my Uncle Joe
He boosts my sprirts and strokes my ego
He's my sweet patootie, Uncle Joe. ...

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