Short Plumbers Poems

Plumbers refuse to make a return visit.
After Medusa washes her hair out well.
Too many eager snake eyes watching them.
Down the drain where monsters dwell....

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our corner winds come
challenging the storm rage on
so-larr brights the skies
~
torrent rains plumbers
there be no music here now
shaking in the skies

...

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Teachers work best when in seminars
Poets read verses in smokey bars
Chefs rock with a spoon
Plumbers show their moon
But Astronomers shoot for the stars!

January 5, 2019...

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Sump pump is broken
Constant water run
Plumbers cost money
Homeowner is sad
Waits a bit too long

The basement floods
Ruins couches
Bedding thrown out
Salvage nothing

Expensive
Life lesson
Plumber comes

Nasty
Stump pump
Flood
...

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TOP SECRET according to Trump
Is toilet paper for his rump
It all gets flushed
But now he's rushed
His toilet can't handle the dump

 (To Donald, TOP SECRET is when
Stormy Daniels visits again
For no one should know
What time she will blow
For God may declare it a sin!)...

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Those guys in white shirts are so lucky.
        Compared to our job, theirs is ducky.
        I speak for us plumbers.
        Some days are such bummers,
        spent knee-deep in things really yucky.


April 19, 2018, entered in Robert Haigh's Best Single Limerick Contest

January 3, 2019, entered in Joseph May's Limerick contest...

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A piddle of puppies, a pimp of johns,
A flood of plumbers, and a regatta of swans.

A charm of finches, a wriggle of sperms,
A sleaze of lawyers, and a sneeze of germs.

a gam of showgirls, a basket of buns,
a shrug of mechanics, and a groan of puns.

A fidget of boy scouts, a gross of farts,
A sulk of teens, and a valentine of hearts....

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The plumbers name was stop cock jock
Whose eyes were firmly on the clock
Put his wrench in his belt
What a shock when he knelt
Cos the grippers caught in his ad hoc

With tears flowing like a river
He tried to stand and deliver
His bits changed to blue
Mates said what a to-do
Stop cock jock was all of a quiver


Penned January 3 2019...

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PLUMBERS BUMMERS -  FIVE FOOTLES

Brain Drain

Dumber
Plumber

--------------------------------

Oshkosh – OH MY GOSH!!

Butt crack
gone slack

----------------------------------

Plumb Sexy

No stench
wrench wench




Contra-Septic

Blue pill
bag fill




Pay Day

No rush
He’s flush



©3/23/2017

submitted to – FABULOUS FUN FOOTLES – Poetry Contest...

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She urgently needed to pooh
No paper, what should Eileen do
She took off her drawers
And used them of course
Then disposed of them down the loo

Her knickers then blocked up the drains
Some plumbers found brown stained remains
So when you're using a loo
Just flush wee, paper and pooh
It's easy, folks should use their brains

Inspired by a story on sky news

4/24/18...

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Without great words of wisdom, a nation will survive.
Without purveyors of idiom, a dynasty will thrive.
But let the sewers overflow when waters run amiss,
And you will find a people on the brink of the abyss.

Kingdoms rise to glory through the works of humble men
Whose masterpiece is laid with pipe, not scratches from a pen.
So if the water from the tap should flow with earthy umber,
Best dry the mess with manuscript and then go call a plumber....

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