Short Colonel Poems

In every lie, a kernel of Truth ~
    Old folks no longer jealous of youth...

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Colonel Sanders
Maybe roasted salamanders
But he got the world  finger lickin’
With his recipe for Kentucky Fried Chicken

For Andrea’s contest...

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Did you know
The cow was slaughter?
Did you know 
The general touches your daughter?

Did you know
The colonel lies?
Did you know
Your son has died?...

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We all made fun of their swimming champ.
Ate KFC beside him, fingers damp.
He won every race.
Putting us in our place.
We mailed him off to Colonel Sander’s Camp....

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Popcorn 
stillborn 

Colonel 
kernal

Combat 
dessert

Army 
charming

Uncooked 
good luck
 
quack quack 
says duck

10/12/20
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr © 2020...

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harsh Colonel Saito
bridge is built... bridge is blown up-
war's utter madness






Copyright © 2018 by Mark Toney. All rights reserved.
Published 2018 in "Hollywood Haiku" via wattpad.com...

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Good afternoon sir Colonel Sanders,
I wonder how you still have that smile.
I admire how you’ve kept your standards
After many complaints for a long while.
At least that smile of yours have some style!!!!...

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COLONEL HARLAND SANDERS
BY James Edward Lee Sr.


COLONEL HARLAND SANDERSMade seasoned pressured-fried chicken
Made in his restaurant original or crispy
Served with a bisket and not Dunkin Donuts

12/05/17...

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[with apologies to Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae]

We are the winkers! Short days ago,
We played all night, until dawn's glow,
Squopped and were squopped: for here we go
In the Fields of Winks, to hop them low....

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Colonel Harland David Sanders
To people's palates he panders
KFC sell great fried chicken
So good, it’s really finger lickin!

Celebrity or Famous Person Clerihew Poetry Contest

Sponsored by Tania Kitchin

3/20/19...

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Here lies the best Grandfather,
One who was very considerate.
Remembering him as a child,
I would sit on his lap.
He was a rare person indeed.
He was a colonel in the Army.
Also superlative of a gentelman.
Here lies the best grandfather,
May he rest in peace....

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Lee bridged the race divide
when prejudice had nowhere to hide-
Riding a mustang in the sky
His deeds gave bigotry the lie,
sterotyping his,to defy.

Tribute to Lt-Colonel Lee Archer (1919-2010) WW2 fighter pilot and VP of General Foods who 
died this past week...

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the coral, the...coral

apocalypse now...
yours is the win colonel kurtz...
you inherit rock

forests...your playgrounds
covered the earth as corals
once...and we kill reefs

atmospheres are dumps
and we...are garbage creatures
human mold...fungus


stan sand...

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I've had one of those sleeps
That is made up 
Of the regular check in
"Eyes open, check asleep, all present and correct, resume sleep"
I'd prefer one of those "I don't know what I've been told" chants, if a Sergeant Major is on the scene
But I seem to have Colonel Hathi from the Jungle Book
I'm still tired, in case you haven't guessed...

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Infernal Urinal

It started running in middle
of the night for a short time
for no particular reason.

There is something about my urinal
That is known to be infernal
Saw a colonel sitting on my pot
About problem mouth off shot
About kidneys which are internal.

Jim Horn

http://www.poetrysoup.com/poets/top_100_poets_most_poems_all_time.aspx...

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Colonel Flighty is a cad
Thinks himself a funny wag
Thinks he's mighty, ain't that sad
"Look at me! A strutting stag!"

Jiggly belly, jowls that sag
Throat all phlegmy, such a drag
Trousers smelly, makes you gag
Leaky colostomy bag.

Toss him quickly drown a crag
If he lives we'll be so mad
End his sickly feeble brag
Hear his fading shout, "Egad!"...

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This is something that’s far from pleasing.
I know a girl that can’t stop sneezing.
Whenever she has something to eat,
the sneezes come out loud as they repeat.
Is it possible to have allergies
when she consumes too many calories?
If she sneezes while eating chicken with the Colonel,
will that be something to put in a medical journal?
...

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When Sitting Bull and Colonel Custer were locked in mortal battle,

   And with arrows flying and heard was the muskets' fearsome rattle,

      Finally surrounded and when all hope was lost, Custer was heard to say,

         "You must be bull sittin' me!"  Proclaiming with his last breath, "Foul play!"

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) All Rights Reserved...

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Colonel Sanders decided to sell KFC.
When he did, the new owner changed his recipe.
Sanders was quarrelling on television and he was very mad.
They changed his recipe and that was pretty bad.
He shouldn't have sold his restaurants, he should've left them to his kids.
But he decided to sell and he quickly regretted that he did.
Those restaurants gave Sanders fame.
What happened was a damn shame....

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Braggadocios  Colonel McBragg
caught a truth bomb
gag shrapnel frag
This sent his damaged, prideful heart
on a flatline drag

His coffin was dress uniform covered
by a neatly folded flag

All those in consternated attendance,
wondered ruefully ...
with fretful thoughts a-sag,
that brain prickly did nag:
 
What classified secrets loose lips McBragg
had let out of the intel bag...

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In this decade: pizza, soda, 
Colonel Sanders, 
burgers only fifteen cents;
"Tutti Frutti," 
sock hops, "mooning," 
Rock and Roll (monumental consequence);

Rosa's bus ride, 
suburbs, fluoride,
escalating sales, 
vaccine for polio;
Mickey Mouse Club, 
Haley, Hitchcock, 
Davy Crockett, 
drive-ins,
 Fats Domino;

Causeless Rebel crashing car, 
bouffant hairdos,
 "har dee har har;"
Elvis on TV

 and ME....

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Accessible rhyme is never good.
The penalty is understood—
soft titters from dark board rooms where
the businessmen paste on their hair
and, Colonel Klinks, defend the Muse
with reprimands of Dr. Seuss.

The best book of the age sold two,
or three, or four (but not to you),
strange copies of the ones before,
misreadings that delight the board.
They sit and clap; their revenues
fall trillions short of Mother Goose....

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A clown named Ronald
Sold us on McDonalds
Then the King came to play
Saying have it your way
Old Dave squared the deal
Inviting us to Wendy's for a meal
The Queen has ice cream treats
Old Arby has the meats
Bojangles danced in with chicken and tea
But the Colonel holds the secret recipe
When along came a chick from down GA
Goes by the name of Fil-A
She refuses to work on a Sunday
Yet it is her pleasure to lead the way...

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and two men came 
greeting
crossing their paths
whispering to
the maker of mankind -

o, to the altar
came the men
one was the colonel
the other an half-cast
of an enriching poverty

"o lord!" whisper'd one
"how i wish my haven
could last richly
on an earthly eternity
for that dog my boots
to lick, o thank you, lord!"

and the bells did ring
everywhere
the world lay in tears
as heaven was a-ready
with some packs.

(to be contd.)...

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With Southern charm
He forged the hold
Of foreign gold
On town and farm.

He gave us two
Proud presidents—
No accidents--
Yet hid from view.

I guess he felt
That Wilson could
Be used, as should
Be Roosevelt.

He coached the game
To win us all:
The Federal
Reserve’s its name.

And he’s to thank 
For nations leagued
And then intrigued
Behind One Bank.

You ask my source?
Read his own book,
A blood-bathed look
At rule by force....

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