Christmas Parody Poems

A Parody for Soupers based on the song, 'Santa Claus is Coming to Town.'

You better not shout
You better not sigh
You better not pout
I'm telling you...

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Out from the 'Chop Shop,' breaking laws,
"Speed bumps, Hoods!" Scold Grand Mamas,
Found with the blacksmith made lots of noise,
Served an acquittal now kissing boys,

First comes...

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I'm dreaming of the sandy beaches
Just like the ones I’ve seen before,
Where the surf is rising,
With lovers surmising,
While kayakers skim along the shore.

I’m dreaming of...

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Parody of The Holly And The Ivy. I ran out of
steam after verse two, but I felt it still worked

     ...

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Christmas Eve night, drunks have a fight
They’re not calm, they’re not bright
Trying to buy wives a last minute gift
Grabbing the last one, it’s caused a...

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We six sheep of Bethlehem be
Bogg, Whiff, Wheep, the triplets and me*
We all get fed and sleep in this shed
It's simple, but so are we!

O...

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O Christ Child Devine
One enchanted night came sweet Angel singing
Proclaiming peace was descending down to earth
On wings of love a baby boy was winging
Souls filled...

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Rescue me from boughs of folly
Tra la la la la, such misery
‘Tis the time to make most jolly
Tra la la la, la, it’s blizzardly.
Heavy coats...

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I think I’m in danger
I could end up dead
When my wife smells the perfume
on her side of the bed
The perfumes I buy her
From a cheap...

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[A parody of Mistletoe and Wine... apologies to Sir Cliff]
[‘Chorus’ indented for easy skipping if desired]


This night it will bring, a venomous sting
His life is...

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The feast was all done,
For Grinch and the Who’s,
 And after the meal,
Came terrible news.

For Max and the Grinch,
And Who’s gathered round,
No one spoke a...

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One last time
The stage is mine
The Media's stunned
That deal now canned.

What were they thinking
With clearly no inkling
I'd throw in a wrench
And create such a stench.

Congress...

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Ding Dong!! Jingle bells, jingle bells,
Here’s our time to party in our shells!
Mr. Rudolph the red nose reindeer,
Please wear a mask this upcoming year!
I don’t...

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Rudolph the red nose reindeer
had a very tiny hose
but if you gentle rub it 
suddenly the small thing grows 

All of the other reindeer 
used...

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It's party time, you drank beer then wine
You’re over the limit but think you’ll drive fine
Can’t steer in a straight line, hit a Ferrari
The policemen...

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