Neanderthal Poems

The Meandering Neanderthal

In his heart is burning aggression
And violence is his lifelong confession
And sure he might wear nice shoes and a tie
But that's a masquerade mask to suit the lie 
A barbarian in heart and mind
He rarely fits in with the civilized kind
Dancing on his victim's grave
He assuredly is a dastardly knave
Devilish desires feed his fury
Quelling the

Neanderthal Quandary

As Neanderthals, you must know
that, wherever you may go, 
you will be hunted by the blokes
who describe themselves as modern folks. 
With culture and books, they're so chill - 
until...they begin to kill. 

Cold Case Neanderthal, Whodunit?

A Neanderthal
with intent on graffiti
dabbed a red nose daub
on stone face of granite stone
prints for nosy sleuth fiends

Planet Neanderthal Island

I must report that the Professor of Anthropology was more interested in how extinct prehistoric man, more specifically, Neanderthals, lived and why they didn’t survive.  They seem bigger with bigger brains from the fossilized records.  To her, it just didn’t make sense.  So, she bought an island in an undisclosed location (classified)

Bring Back Neanderthal Man

     ~ An Eight-Line Treatise on 'Settler Colonialism' ~

         The Apache beat up on the Cheyenne
           and the Iroquois on the Sioux

         Mohawks ‘mohawked’ the

Neanderthal Revived

The lost mirror of humanity’s soul, covered by helix threads 
Or a creature who would destroy the wall of man and beast 
Who would rip apart man’s olive crown for the kingdom of nature

Mr Neanderthal Man

HEY! HEY!

Mr. Neanderthal Man
Where did you get those looks?
Hey pretty boy! Seen pictures of you
In my ancient history books

WOW! WOW!

What a great physique 
Unmatched in these here parts
Should enter a Mr. Universe Contest
In a new category set apart

BAD! BAD!

Didn't mean to offend you
You do have redeeming factors
Lighting a fire rubbing sticks together
And avoiding nuclear disasters

HEY!

Neanderthal Like

The secret to life is no secret at all
It's as simple as learning to speak or to crawl
When we master that
The rest is a snap
Erect we'll look less like a neanderthal

Neanderthal Me

A Neanderthal me comes at night,
He’s storm and grumpy, an ugly blight.
You will not see him with human eyesight.
But he’ll be unkind, and I don’t mean slight.

Top Neanderthal

A happy life is not available to all
Circumstances determine who's invited to the ball
The successful ones
Are ones with strong lungs
Saying, “Look at me! I'm your top neanderthal!”

Acting Like a Neanderthal

Further to my friend's recent post
My son's friend threw a tantrum, hubby was the goat
She threw his meal against the wall
He was acting like a neanderthal
Expecting to be fed like a king in royal robes

Neanderthal Tongue Kissing

Do you think neanderthals learned to tongue kiss
It would explain the seven billion people on the premises
If they just held hands
And touched other glands
But apparently the tongue was a sex organ causing bliss

Meeting the Neanderthal

I fell forty-two feet into the time travel well, sadly.
And ended up barely alive, at the bottom, gladly.
Followed a crevice to a hunky macho caveman’s lair.
He had all kinds of ugly, cranky, snarly filthy hair.

Shockingly, he made an untoward amorous move toward me.
Utterly surprised he was at how rapidly mean I could be.
Next the crude

Neanderthal

N - Not usually spotted in the western hemisphere
E - Extinct in Canada
A- Almost always
N- Nervous around humans
D- Disappears in deep underbrush when sensed
E -Enthusiastic about privacy and un-birthday parties
R-Rarely seen in cities
T-Typically shy
H-Hair grows faster than a grizzly
A-Appetite for green plants
L-Loves not being the center of attention

Neanderthal Soup

The hairiest arm came out of the pot and slapped me.
I slapped it back, angry now, for without a head, 
How could the arm do that?

My husband jumped out of his recliner.
What are you making? He asked.
His voice was shaky.
It is always shaky when I am inventing food.

Don’t worry about it, I told him.
A foot

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