Mad cow disease is my expertise,
and I dine on fine wine, quince and cheese.
In my august wisdom,
what I sure think is dumb,
is to spit without checking the breeze.
I love this barbeque stuff, the little piggy said.
His father rolled his sow eyes back into his head.
You know those are porch chops he whispered with ease.
Let me ask you, have you ever heard of mad cow disease?
No said the piggy, but these are honey flavored, Dad.
This is the best meal that you, mom or I have ever had.
You’re a cannibal son, his father said. Nothing to brag about.
Then he grabbed up his son’s full plate and he tossed it right out.
Said the Guru - Saying: 181
Don’t drizzle on me because
you definitely don’t want me to drizzle on you.
I have syphilis, aids and mutating mad cow disease.
Are you sure you want some?
Then wear a darn mask.
©Al Juman- The said Poet
Scripture(do onto others what you would want done to you}
Explained -do not do unto others what you would not want done to you
mad cow disease
the cows so relieved
to be penguins
In France a cow's called a vache
A crass bovine who's moo is so brash
Some are infected by mad cow disease
They give sour milk, making rancid cheese
I know what will be a cow's fate
One day soon she'll be on my plate
I will not miss its whiney mooing
Or cow pats in fields from its poohing
Inspired by but not for Animal Nonsense Contest
08-18-17
MEDICAL MIRACLES
What happened to mad cow disease?
And bird flu from Thailand? I ask myself.
Legionnaire’s disease? Minimata? E - coli ?
Did they succumb to medical expertise?
Or just disappear from the current-panic shelf?
Will you survive the next wave? Will I ?
black snakeroot, yew, cocklebur, poison (ivy, oak, parsnip, sumac, ryegrass, hemlock), blister bushes, daffodil, mayapple, lilium, jerusalem cherry, indian licorice, deadly nightshade, christmas rose, bleeding heart, asparagus berries, wolfsbane, tomato leaves, doll’s eyes, the suicide tree, young larkspur, blue-green algae, stinkweed, dumbcane, european spindle, blind-your-eye mangrove, manchineel, laburnum, mother of millions, elderberry root, bacterial pathogens, exotoxins, mycotoxins, grayanotoxins, rhinovirus, chicken pox, sleeping sickness, cholera, yellow fever, typhoid, rotavirus, river blindness, measles, japanese encephalitis, hepatitis (a,b & c), cryptosporidiosis, shigella infection, pneumonia, meningitis, tuberculosis, schistosomiasis, malaria, influenza, herpes (1 & 2), crab louse, scabies, chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, chancroid, trichomoniasis, hpv, hiv/aids, ebola virus, marburg virus, mad cow disease, mudslides, avalanches, blizzards, storms, cyclones, hurricanes, tsunamis, tornadoes, earthquakes, floods, fires, supervolcanic eruptions: evidence of absence.
One cow said to the other, visually worried,
"This mad cow disease is really very scary.
It's spreading fast through out the dairy industry.
An entire herd had to be put down recently
because they all started going crazy.
I wonder when this disease will get to us."
"I wouldn't worry," said the other cow, "it doesn't effect us ducks."
It beggars belief at the time of the Bovine troubles
Cartoon capers mirror in abundance like little Barney Rubble's
An epidemic so troubling that we called Mad Cow disease
In it's simplistic traceability it was readily in please
In a seek and ye find just a cow in a field
Born in Appleby three years ago, no hide, please can you yield
We can trace where it came from right back to where it slept
Tracking her calves to certain stalls, boy! we sure don't feel inept
But in our country of so many million, where can they all go
Thousands of illegal immigrants amongst us they do flow
Red Tape, Civil Servants and Politicians, they signed to allow
Just maybe when we find them, each of them we'll donate a cow
http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/political.php
I don’t want Swine flu
So no more pork for me
I don’t want Bird flu
So no chicken fricassee
I don’t want mad cow disease
So no more Beef for me
I don’t want Salmonella
So no dippy eggs for tea
With mercury in the water
I will no longer eat fish
There is pollution in the air
So I’ll eat no bird related dish
I cannot eat any type of fruit
Because of insecticides
And all vegetables are out
Because of the herbicides
So I am at a loss now
To know what I can eat
There is of course chocolate
But then what would be my treat?
I watch very intently, as each move is made
Who is in the sun and who is in the shade
From the California Cheese to the Midwest Plains
It is affecting their brains
A good burger needs all the fixins, hey Mom, don't forget the cheese
But we don't want the Mad Cow Disease
Take Chester as an example
He wanted to handle matters himself, ended up getting trampled
Jane does exist, but her last name isn't Doe
But she is in love with John, that's why her face is aglow
Judy was down at a Saints game and ran on to the field to join the huddle
claiming she was replacing Drew Breeze
This is only a few that have been taken over by the Mad Cow Disease
How many more people will be labotomized
This disease wears a brilliant disguise
Go ahead laugh if you must
Who will be laughing when the famous words are read, Ashes to Ashes, Dust to
Dust
Let's pass this on to the illegal refugees
Then send them back where they came from and share their wealth of the Mad
Cow Disease
The water is polluted,the air is getting thin,
casual sex is dangerous
mad cow disease is in.
Cigarettes give you cancer,
alcohol damages the heart,
so many things are bad, we don't know where to start.
For the car drivers of the 90s its bad news too
the hole on the ozone is blamed on you.
Public transport is popular like never before,
as the buses fill up along come more.
All of this has been said before.
execpt in the 90s the people listened more.
´
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