Long Spuds Poems

I’ve always been a prankster and a lover of a joke.
I love to see the puzzled look on an unsuspecting bloke,
when he looks around and lifts his hat - totally confused.
Some take a joke for...

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At the final stroking of saint Halloween eve, it seems not so long ago,
That my trusty SUV, transport vehicle unceremoniously broke down,
Right outside the local pet cemetery, what a marvelous place to
Spend the spookiest night...

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Me real name it is Bill Vonbertouche,	
but for short most folk just call me Bill.
Me Mum and Dad say I’m real smart,	
but the girls reckon I’m just a dill.	

But let’s just get this one thing...

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(The memories are simple, living the feeling significant)

After conquering Beamsley Beacon due Southwest,
Rombald’s moor stood, while for centuries
within the valley the minute dwellings
of grey stone, brick and muck.
Main waterway, depending on era
town or sailor beck,...

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For thirty years I’ve been a truckie who has driven far and wide,
Carting goods through day and night all across the countryside…
But hours spent upon the road, do not permit a set routine,
When it comes...

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In the dark of the night, 
when all are sleeping, out of sight,
the Oggles come out to play. 
For they love to flirt, 
in the rubbish and the dirt,
a curious courtial display.

For Oggles mate for...

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I’ve sorted spuds at Cora Lynn, picked asparagus at Vervale, 
Cherries in the Dandenong’s, beans on the Thompson close to Sale,
I’ve picked apples out at Labertouche and made a tidy quid,
But I’ve never picked an...

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After moments she shook her head,
then moved over to the brick hearth,
a strew cooked over glowing coals,
she threw more spuds in for her part.

Then came over to the main room,
and sat herself down on a...

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This is the place the ’punchers come
when it is time to drink their pay,
ride in from the hilly rangelands
to forget cattle for a day.

Norma in the kitchen will cook
beef and spuds for this roving horde,
her...

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the footing on the flanks of the Hill of Beans
was worse than he had sussed
that drizzling pale morning
when the Sun was lowest
but beans be damned
and their counters with them
yes I know
a smoky mess
like most of...

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For contest Sponsored by: (Destroyer ((Poet
My worst poem ever

The sights and the scenes that you might have seen
Will hold no great power or trill
When tonight I regale that wondrous tale
Of the farmer that lived in...

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I was working for Jack Daymond, a farmer,
who farmed livestock, potatoes and vines.
I s’pose he had over two hundred cattle.
The spuds and the grapes grew in lines. 

Oh gawd! Jack had me slaving ‘til sunset,
keeping...

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Though amply rested, I still yawn

And feel energized after
light exercise doth spawn
break through viz mental impasse,
where endeavor to coax 
germinating ideas to sprout
about as successful as 
buzzfeeding, jump/kick starting 
rooting brown lawn
to whether drought.

Long fostering...

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Doctors (particularly biomedical engineers)...
really trolley train hard to keep track of patients

Eye tell ya we (spuds)
pulled up stakes after four yar
and zero scores ago living in Bryn Mawr
salutary heart and lungs figurative
storied Main Line Health...

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Don’t worry about being thinner
Get yourself off down the pub
Then go home to a good British dinner,
Of British traditional grub

Delicious roast beef of old England
Served up with a thick Yorkshire pud
With roast spuds and cabbage...

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he waived cross examination
innovation had suffered a sucking head wound
and the Mossad was after my ass 
a post Ragnarok picnic with a fire on the ice
hot enough to fry a penguin steak
code breakers grab your...

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Retrieved Passage 3:
From The Book of Days, Sonnet 2


For Lo! I must relate this tome to you
who gather here to listen and believe
to tell the story I believe is true
before my sanity (BARK!) takes its...

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Two of the wackiest guys I know,
	live two doors down, 
		           one flight below

Tall is one, the other is short
One chirps loud all the time...

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Two of the wackiest guys I know,
	live two doors down, 
		           one flight below

Tall is one, the other is short
One chirps loud all the time...

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6/8/21


Blood stained into lands being conquered
Blood on this can of Monster
Blood in the water
Blood pooling and congealing from all the slaughter
Blood hitting close to home,  when you got a squatter
Blood whether the weather turned...

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Spud's New Car, a tribute to my ever so lovely hamster Spud  . . . 

SPUD’S NEW CAR

My hammy has hit the wheel, but; doesn't seem to be getting very far 
So I thought...

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To a birthday party I was invited, 
as an 11 year old I should have been excited.
I really didn't want to go,
the people there I didn't really know.

The day arrived and mum drove me there,
I...

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Bullwhip Bob settled in the cafe
and ordered fried spuds and beef.
A railroad man in Bingham’s Town,
he came here each noon to eat.

He’d gotten his name not for his job,
but because each and every day,
he went...

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Aubrey Mc Govern
by Don Johnson ........
Aubrey McGovern and the Deaf & the Deefe
lived down on Cubbie on damper and beef.
The damper was easy McGovern could cook
the beef it was shady  Deaf &  Deefe...

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They're known by many names - taters, potatos, pertaters and spuds.
As a Hoosier lad I toiled hoein' taters and flickin' bugs off their buds!
So I was very well qualified when I entered the service, by...

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