Long Rationalizations Poems

"Years” and “Distance”, phantoms of the dark that do their evil
in the quietude of the everyday, coming and going without so
much as a footprint or a whisper, and taking the most valuable
possessions of the heart,...

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The East Meets West Philosophy Association
had their annual 2020 conference in Rio,
when and where anything multiculturally lusty
is more likely to happen,
especially between sunset
and sunrise.

Coincidentally
and existentially
and phenomenologically
and ecologically
and ethologically
and epistemologically,
and astrologically,
and metaphorically,
it was necessarily
and sufficiently
and justly
and...

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Wrapped into a cocoon of impenetrable meaning and faith he followed the light

Doom and gloom had once shadowed his library of dreams and contentment

Scattered in his loony resemblance of a rational mind words rearranged reason

Analyses...

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I am writing to you because I know you have a wish.
I have been thinking diligently about your wish. It is not
going to be easy but I think it can be done. First I am...

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i dreamt
i moved into a apartment
with an old brick wall
and its decaying face
the old light hanging from a thread
swings on the open breeze
from the window
time seems to slow down to a crawl
so i can see...

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Both paradise and hell
have their detractors.

I find some exaggerated truth
in this belief--
one person's paradise
is another's hell.

An eternity
of worshiping an unchanging
omnipotent
omniscient
omnipresent 
mono-egotistical god
is not my idea of healthy re-creation.

I have never heard this
in reverse--
One person's hell
may...

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There is a beat to the world,
it burns and bites, it can calm & comfort,
it will arouse and it will anger, it is a romantic rhythm,
immutable and immaculate,
an unselfish music it is, life provides this...

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I might have once lived
on a planet
in an actively green multiculture
of Holistic-Organic Nature/Spirits

Green 
spiritual 
ecofeminist climate activists
were at least equal to natural 
red-blooded 
egopatriarchal
monoculturing swelling sticks
thinking in Lose/Lose nihilistic
ecopolitics,
white privileged preferring
straight male trucker dialects
feeling more...

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it danced …

like a drunken ballerina
on her tongue,
tumbling gently as it’s sugary orange
mantle melted and seeped,
properly absorbed by the dermal lining of
her mouth and throat,
and sent like manic heaven to her synapses,
turning angels to demons,
fondnesses...

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Written: September 23, 2023
__________________________________________________________

What was I thinking, I pondered alone,
As my mind wandered my thoughts were thrown.
Lost in a whirlwind of doubt and despair,
I yearned for an answer, a purpose to share.

To slice beyond the cacophony...

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He sat alone,  inside his own bubble of quiet,
indifferent to the scurrying sounds, the muted bustle 
of people huddled around their departure gates.
I thought him rather overdressed for the weather
looking busy with something I...

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Quiet is the eve with ire I passed among the dead.
Yet, Still… are the thoughts that banged around within my head?
So peaceful rests the fear, thus gone?
The night doth leave at break of dawn?

My soul...

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My emotions swarm, clouding all rational judgement. My pain is a storm in my heart,  my suffering the rain that pours down. I wish tears to fall, to release a part of my agony,...

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Hopefully whole and dreadfully broken.
Rejoiced hearts, shattered dreams, unbearable pain. 
The destiny of one, the fate of a million, different 
Kinds of faces, tremendous joy or excessive pain
Hangs, like a portrait on a rusty nail,...

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Small gauge large sound
could be trivia profound

Stations and shunters
red lights for the punters

Small member large auto
mobile cars pars pro toto

In silly banter we trust
French letters a must

But remember the other
Freud had a mother

In Victorian Vienna...

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Ignominious consecrations - Arise. 
Through tainted, synoptic eyes 
With condescending erroneous lies 
Despicable temptations - tease and denies 
My nemesis creation, 
insatiable appetites are no excuse 
Rationalizations 
A pernicious fight, senseless; a tightening noose 

Ridiculous...

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                                  ...

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Words betray me
Abandoning in the time
Of their need
Thoughts escape
Unfaithful thoughts, evaporate
I panic
Memories, sweet memories
Please come rushing back
I need to recall
I have to narrate
Emotional blackmail
Whatever it takes
I can beg
I can plead
Just don't walk away 
From us
From...

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It probably won’t matter
Whatever I say you crush
The know-it-all refuses to listen
The conceit of a fool is so rigid
Unable to admit your arrogance
Positive advice is sound
Not attacking one’s ego
It’s acceptable to be uninformed
An open mind...

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Its been a while,
Since iv'e smiled
You remind me of her.

That sounds bad, 
But don't be mad 
Because your heart is more pure.

Its hard to love 
the push and shove
and how it gets so much harder

but...

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Greyed cloudscape:
Even the leaves
have, true to their name,
left the Sky.

Readying work is
done.
Flowers, matings, done.

Repairs and preparations,
all made.
The only work remaining
is excuses.  
Exculpations of a worn Self.

Rationalizations
follow realizations 
which have long 
followed idealizations.

Winter is coming
like...

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Memories form in colors
vibrant, vivid, varied
by Time diminished
as the echo filters reality

Each person's process unique ...

Echoes form organically
Desires, wishes, dreams,
hopes, aspirations, schemes,
inclinations, rationalizations,
attracted to then reflected off
Life's hardened surfaces
Discordant reverberation
increasing, subsiding,
in constant flux colliding,
with reality...

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