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Kingdom of My Embrace

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* These pics are of hello (top) and goodbye after my reunion with my children. *

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"Years” and “Distance”, phantoms of the dark that do their evil in the quietude of the everyday, coming and going without so much as a footprint or a whisper, and taking the most valuable possessions of the heart, the things you care about and adore most of all ... They wear cloaks of pretext, mitigation that tempts the soul into rationalizations seemingly just and sensible, but therein lies their insidious and guileful nature ... heartache will find its own remedy when left to itself, and it will seek to surrender to the farthest reaches of the suffering soul ... There we ever strive, consciously or not, to find the tangible grasp on happiness, often at the cost of truth ... “Time” and “Separation”, faceless demons, laughing silently at our foolish striving for those mundane bridges between commonality and the things that sustain us ... The ever-so-brief glimpses of joy and excitement that we are apt to carry in our heart's pocket, taken out and polished as treasure when the shadows wrap us like a shroud - when the fog of life's darker meanderings cling deep - to reflect the glint of reason ever inward .. It has taken me a lifetime, (one spent in the not-so-dignified pursuit of what I thought were the meaningful endeavors), to pull the veil back from the obscurity of their faces, to learn to not glance away at the sight of their stark visage, but stare unblinking and focused and still ... To recognize them for the horrors they are and can be, and not be content to let them find a convenient home in my un- wary conscience ... excuses are the easy playmates for our rational thoughts, and I have oft-times entertained them like welcome and wistful visitors ... Brought into the foyer of my routine with open arms ... but no more! Or at least not without the intense, dire and critical inspection they're due. “Seasons” and “Expanse”, oh, I know you well now, for you have spun and twisted and turned all that's truly precious and dear and true ... Into reasons to flounder and wade in the shallows, while an ocean of elation and wonder sparkled before me! I have yet ripped the blade from your gnarled hand! No longer will you mutilate the fabric of my character, or take the prized and the joyful to hold at arm's-length ... While I stand teetering on the edge of self-imposed hell. You are thus forever vanquished - destroyed at last and at length by the embrace of my children, held and to hold with strength, those miles and many moments purged with a course of tears, washed loose and away with a runnel of weeping, joyous ... Arms entwined with tenacious purpose, far too sure to NOT squeeze away the hurt, questions, and misunderstanding that the past created in their absence ... alas, I am hereafter and henceforth reborn! I am now given life anew! These priceless, sobbing bundles within my arms have restored my faith ... The blessed, precious miracles far beyond value, filling these lungs with breath as pure as winter moonlight ... they have torn asunder every doubt, regret and resentment that those febrile phantoms had danced around me in their stead for so long ... so very, very long ... I am set free! I am released to the knowledge of what it is, and ALL that it is, that matters in this world - these amazing children, mine, now here within the breadth of my grasp! Happy sobs and tears and arms, mixed with love overwhelming, so wondrous and adjoining that I cannot distinguish one from another ... How could I have lost such true perfection? How could I have let those demons commit such a crime against me and mine? Oh, SO much missed out on, so much left to the wiles and apathy of time's relentless passing ... but no more! No, never again! I knew this incredible feeling once ... Long ago, I knew it well and lost it ... but these extraordinary creations of love and consummation, here within the circle of my embrace, have rekindled the glowing embers of my heart! They have restored the hope and reason and passion of my spirit, and brought back a joy that exceeds all true experience ... You, my dear, wonderful children, are so far beyond anything that I deserve or am worthy of, and I will never, EVER forget this feel- ing again, or let those accursed phantoms, “Time” and “Distance”, steal you away from the core of my being and purpose. I have locked you away forever in the round-tower of my soul ... These tears we shed in exuberance, and the soft strength of our embrace, will form the moat around the castle of love and fort- ress of forgiveness that we now tenderly reconstruct ... together. I adore you with the fullness of my heart, and love you with my life ... The life you have given back to me. ~ 1st Place ~ in the "Dear Heart" Poetry Contest, Silent One, Judge & Sponsor.

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Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 1/20/2020 6:52:00 AM

- Congratulations on your beautiful and deeply sensitive poem Gregory, a pleasure to read :) - hugs // Anne-Lise :)

John Hamilton

Date: 1/19/2020 1:21:00 PM

I don't remember this one G, but it is wonderful top quality writing that Silent could appreciate. Normally long poems like this are ignored, this one has to be savored and simmered to bring out the flavor. Well done and congrats on another win!

Winged Warrior

Date: 1/19/2020 8:58:00 AM

Congrats!! my friend... Bravo! Gregory...this is when life can be the most beautiful...I've lost my grandma and mom because of death...and my wife through a divorce (no kids)...the only meaningful ladies in my life- gone...so I know some of the pain that you must of went through...at least now, you got them back...god bless you all Greg..from the Wingster ^WW^ :o)

Constance La France

Date: 1/19/2020 8:04:00 AM

Greg, so beautifully penned, the emotion drips from each word, full of deep honesty, congratulations on your worthy win in the contest_Constance

Silent One

Date: 1/19/2020 6:37:00 AM

Damn, you had a lot withing your heart that you needed to say... Where to start with this brilliant piece of heart felt poetry... Reading your words was like me being in your shoes and these are feelings that everyone will feel, but not sure if everyone can express them as poetically as you.... just brilliant my friend. Congratulations on your first place in the contest.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 1/23/2020 5:12:00 AM

Thank you SO much for the placement and this wonderful comment, Silent One ... I did, indeed, pour a LOT into this poem, heart and soul, and it is about the three most wonderful people in my life, my kids, and that makes it all the more special. I'm so happy you saw the merit in its construction and message, and that it touched your heart. Blessings, My Friend! :o)

Lin Lane

Date: 7/23/2017 10:43:00 AM

Greg, if those pictures are of your family, the love is obvious because it's written on their faces as beautifully as the words of your poem. I was away from family for four years and when I moved back home I felt complete contentment and love. You express your emotions with great depth.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 7/23/2017 11:18:00 PM

When my youngest joined the hug and I could hold them all at once, I just bawled ... yes, I'm a fool for my children, and not embarrassed to say so. Lots of tears that day - joyful tears! ;-)

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 7/23/2017 11:15:00 PM

Here's the link, Lin, (excuse the little f-bomb by my youngest daughter - she didn't know it was being recorded, lol) ... https://youtu.be/hTiuqLAG_3A

Lin Lane
Date: 7/23/2017 1:55:00 PM

oh how wonderful that you've all found each other again in so many ways, Greg. I'll look for the video. I looked but I don't think I located the right person. Help?

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 7/23/2017 10:49:00 AM

Thank you so much, Lin! Those photos are from a year ago ... I was separated from my oldest daughter for 23 years, my son for 13 years, (my youngest daughter, from a different marriage, was with me and lives close), not due to anything within our control, and this was when we were reunited, (there is a video on Youtube).

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 7/23/2017 10:49:00 AM

This was the first time I'd held all of my children together in 23 years, and it was the happiest time of my life - in ALL our lives! The bottom pic was when we had to say goodbye ...

Darren White

Date: 7/23/2017 9:13:00 AM

I can't get enough of the photos, and I know the story behind them. It makes me cry in a good way my friend. You are here, they need you, and you need them. No matter what. I have only my sister(s) and her family and no one else, BUT I have friends. Hold on to your family and friends, and enjoy it Greg.

Gregory Richard Barden
Date: 7/23/2017 10:53:00 AM

Thank you, Dear Friend, that is ALL that really matters in life - love, friends, and family - it is our treasure and our purpose, and worth everything. I can't look at these photos without tears. Love you, Buddy. <3