Long Pee pee Poems

The outty and the inny
Fleshy repeated stabbings
Produce a ninny
To be tossed to the fray
And taught their worth for the day
Is to obey
What we say
Of how, when, and why to play

Its your moral decay we crave
Your...

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On the first day of Christmas my doggie brought to me, pee-pee under my tree

On the second day of Christmas my doggie brought to me, two licks of love and pee-pee under my tree 

On...

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Good morning children! Rise and shine!
15 minutes until breakfast time.
Hurry up or you’ll be late.
David!! Do not say the word hate.
BECAUSE, it is not a nice word
No  Sierra, we are NOT getting a bird.
BOY,...

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It only took me one cap and one stem,
For the Halloween feeling to kick right in.

I took to the night,
Like a ride in a bike.

Please do not quote me on this,
But I really had to...

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pregnant pet

                we bet                ...

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Original poem posted Aug. 3, 2021 for Charles Messina's Contest: 
When I Let One Loose in the Elevator
(for those who do not know, SBD means "Silent But Deadly")

When I let one loose in the elevator,
so...

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There is a change in the air
Of supposed men
Who reject they have a pair
And desire women’s underwear

How weak minded
To follow this trend
Of pretending this gender
That you bend

To follow the flow
That its your job
To suck and...

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(alternately titled:
Pee pee song and dance routine)

Invariably analogous setting
kickstarts schlemiel to agitate
excretory mechanism linkedin,
viz body electric doth actuate
merely upon turning faucet triggers
unstoppable onset to micturate

drinking coffee or caffeinated tea
also functions as diuretic
mimics similar rush'n spate
oh...

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My Philosophy

let me loose in this here caboose
 Sucka's going to see me before I go pee pee
 Buggy down to the sock's just as the famed Scott Lerock
 I'm the man with the plan...

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Cat Love  ©

Don't ruffle my fur that direction! I've got it looking just the way I want.

I love you but I'm very busy today.

Don't move, this is my lap time and I'm very comfy.

Scratch...

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"The universe is an implacable force sans any intention period."
-- Physics 101, 
Lesson 1: "The Horror!  The Horror!"  
 
*   *   *  
 
In Dixie, all us kin...

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Good morning Mommy and Dad
Today I will try not to be bad

I don't know what I want to eat
No! Not that cereal. It's not sweet

Mommy, I don't wanna sit on the baby pot
How come you...

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brocoli rob
smoke the hemp
the day after that mechanical man Al Gore took the stand
I couldn't cry over Bourdain
tried to see what he was up to next but it was too late
a Chinese man was in...

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It's the last afternoon and we run for the school bus,
me and my brother, Mick, finally free,
'cos it's summer vacation, no teachers, no homework,
all the time in the world, well, a clear month or three.

We...

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I hope you Dance..
One thing I have learnt , especially with this boy, Oh!! for the mind of a child..We need to view things from a child's perspective. 
With children there is a dance for...

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I am Dan, to some, Dan The Man
I peed my pants for too long
to be the man.

Before I say why; know, 
it will make me cry.
Will it you? Or only sigh.
To sigh or cry, let...

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ooh! wee!
I've gotsta gets
up and pee

it is the late night's
wee, wee!
i gotsta go and pee-e

can't hold it in
it about to
blow in thee wind

can't hold it back
its about to be
a late night
warm water attack

so grab it
by...

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When I was younger and I thought of old age

Thought we all became senile at this elderly stage

It appears I was wrong, I can still go potty

And able to dress this tired old body

Try as...

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Hoo Ha or pee pee
Trouser or skirt
Football or Barbie 
What can it hurt

Pink or blue
Stiletto or flat
Pantie or brief
Where are you at?

Sugar and spice
Snips and snails 
Flip it over
Always comes up tails 

Tough Tom
Nelly Nancy...

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Nature calls and I don't mean coyotes
Got a panicky feeling down to my toe-sies

Till the next rest stop to hold it I'll try
Got everything crossed including my eyes

Don't ask me questions, can't answer right now
Really...

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ough, two the window two to shore
rrgh..hey penny one penny tri penny three
elegant hands stay with the script
repeat stage 1,2,3...
Molech was here he was gone for a while
Sunshine boy
Brother Moon & Sister Sun,
remember me in...

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To the mother's I do know,
To the mother's I don't know,
Tomorrow is your day,
You showed love, 
You showed you care, 
You went all out your way to be there,

You cooked,
You cleaned,
You washed their dirty jeans,
Mother...

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Here you go 
My lovely child 
So eager and wild 
Ready to see the world 
And all the ugliness it has to offer?
I have a digital snack to proffer 
Touch, tap, and swipe 
Entertain the...

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Can't drink too much poppy tea

                    Spilt it down my dressing gown 
   ...

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Yes I did it, it was me
When I had to go pee pee
I never put the seat back down
Now my woman wears a frown
Her white toilet is now yellow
I am such a stupid fellow
In trouble...

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