Long Nursery school Poems

Laughter is the shortest distance between the joker and the listener:

My friend got robbed today, they took away his girlfriend Valentine's gift. Now, he rehearsing how he will explain to his girlfriend, how he got...

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Say bye-bye to these:
    "Hold, please." (Hold what?)
    Typewriter Repairman Ads
    "Dial this number..." (What's 'dial?')  
    Down-time... Offline
   ...

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CHRISTOPHER, BLAIR AND CLAIRE

Young Blair was a shy boy, 
Somewhat a nerd,
He just simply could not make a friend,
The nursery school teacher,
Who was my mum,
Enjoyed her job so, 
She was never glum.
Christopher was the lively...

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I have lost a lot of friends
A lot of my friends from back then
Time has stolen them from me
I am not even certain
Of how they met their end ‘
But you specifically 
Do you remember
In Nursery...

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Why was my whole special school life, 
An interpretation of nature and school?
A philosophical contemplation and analysis,
A freeway inquiry into the education tool. 

Because the god concept was lain out,
On the household table, delicately spread,...

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the “changed man”

have you seen the face of the “changed man?”
you know, the one who lost the girl but
wants to get her back---
so he converts himself
into the antithesis of what he once was,
in order to...

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golden raiment trickling threnody ream
hinged present with distant past,  
   that temporarily static surreal moment in time stream 
the best part of existence, thence I became alive 
   from dormant...

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W T F

Let’s imagine somebody 
naive as they can be.
What might they imagine when
WTF they see?

For someone on a diet
could it mean “Withhold the Fat?”
“Wash the Fridge” perhaps?
My mom would think of that!

A girl into...

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Why do you do it? Scrooge asks Santa.
What? Santa asks.
All that ho ho ho, Christmas cheer, Scrooge says.
Bah humbug I say.

Santa ponders how to reply,
knowing he will not convert Scrooge,
but wanting him to understand.
Why don’t...

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Rome wasn't built in a day
   Mexicans like saying "Ole!"
If your horse eats nothing but hay
   Teach him how to order on e-Bay

While terriers put sugar in their 'tay'
  ...

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Pivotal moments
From when I was a tiny girl
In my first year of school
That drift through my thoughts 
Like the apple sticker that 
Was my peg at nursery school
And feeling proud of having
Remembered which was mine
"It's...

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Remembering my mother, 
when a baby, I was
in a cot wrapped up warm 
singing me a lullaby to suit
Sleep beautiful, 
Sleep a dream happily.

Remembering my mother, 
With tears in her eyes
As my cries of pain...

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A GYPSY LIFE

As a child I had the privilege to live in a Ledger and loved it, it was warm and it had its own wood stove where my Mam made only the best of...

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One time when I was in nursey school, Miss Shanahan had everyone sit in a circle and one-by-one say what we wanted to be when we grow up.

It was what you’d expect…
Doctor
Firefighter
Astro naught
Truck driver
Race car...

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When kids are born, we sacrifice – 
Our time, our sleep, our food.
Activities we once enjoyed
We sometimes must exclude.

We share our sandwich and our seat;
We schlep to kiddie classes
And sometimes opportunity
Waves smugly as it passes.

The...

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There once was a young tot named Fazool
Who attends a posh nursery school
Got himself in a pickle
For charging a mere nickel
Each time he let a girl see his tool.

Fazool was an enterprising lad
He didn't think...

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( to the tune of "Yankee Doodle")

Grandpa went to nursery school
To fetch his darling grandson;
Put the boy inside his car,
But somehow not the planned one.

Grandpa made a little goof;
Boys had outfits matchin’.
Sound like just a...

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