Long Few and far between Poems
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Because for my disability there is no magic fix
So in the dead of night when the clock strikes midnight
I lean back slowly in my desk chair and I stare into the darkness
And sometimes I just close my eyes and imagine I'm someone else
Because I'm in so much pain it honestly makes me sick
And the idea of death used to terrify me to the point of being sleepless
But now it just seems like sweet relief if I'm being honest
But it's not like I would ever kill myself or anything
Truth be told this isn't really a poem it's a revelation
This is what I deal with every single day
There are times I honestly feel really good about myself
But those days are truly few and far between
And this piece of paper is the only place I have the courage
To spill my soul in a manner such as this
Because I have never felt like I was worth anyone's time
A lazy eye, anxiety, and no self confidence are my dearest friends
And as I sit here in this chair and reflect my emotions have run dry
Just like my cheeks have finally run dry as the tears ceased
I guess 28 years of feeling inferior is really hard to overcome
And I totally understand there are people who have it worse
I feel empathy for everyone suffering their own private battles
But my experience is uniquely mine, their experience is uniquely theirs
So I don't feel whataboutism has any place in this discussion
When I began this poem I had no idea where it would even go
For once I just wanted to write out my conflict without pretty words
I wanted this message to be as simple and direct as possible
That every time you look in my eyes you can't fathom the agony hidden
But if you know someone with an affliction like mine or any kind
Please just give them a hug and tell them they really matter
Because it might not seem like they need it but they really do
Or maybe it's just me and I can't really speak for anyone
I just know I can't be the only one alone in their room at midnight crying
Because they haven't lived a single day feeling normal
I guess in the end I want to reach out to those just as fractured as me
So that together we can finally be whole again
When the clock finally strikes midnight
Fall few and far between
The thousands of the common lot
That sink to nothing in the march of time.
Days like this,
All warmth of gold poured down
From a roof all Blue Serenity
Breezes soft and sweet
As sighs of innocent sleep
Crowds of trees nodding in council together
Around them the fields, an emerald sea -
These days are gifts
Of Gaia gone adorned in naked beauty
Her veils all pulled aside
For those who know just how to look
To see her as she really is:
Seductress Mother, Comforter, Slayer,
Harvester of Souls.
She draws her newborns to the light,
Then closes their eyes and rocks them to another sleep
Full of unknowable dreams,
Waking them again in different shapes.
She dances then to her selfmade tunes,
Of snowstorms in the heart of June
Or roses 'neath an autumn moon -
Confirmation, Contradiction;
Epithets and Benedictions.
On days like this a drum beats
Somewhere deep inside a quiet corner of the soul,
Calling from a distant time
When we spoke volumes to each other
Dancing 'round the sacred flames in holy silence
While the wolves howled through the icy dark
- If you listen you may feel it yet -
Stop awhile and watch the distant trees
Nodding in their ancient way,
Sighs winding close between them;
She has let the veils slip loose
Blinding in her nakedness
Breath trailing all around you warm
Like the blood you shared within the womb -
There are drums
There are songs
Salt of sea drifting through your veins
As you smile a wolf's smile without knowing it -
All these and more lie just below the surface
Before She turns and draws
Her cloak of stars about Her,
Have one last look and just remember
That nothing down here is truly trivial,
Each day another page writ
In the just-beginning Human Story.
Smile like a wolf and remember:
Terrible things, Wondrous things,
Secret, Sacred, Magnificent things
Are always happening somewhere;
Happening Somewhere
On days
just like this.
I hear the cars as they pass
I can’t help but dream to jump in one
And just make the ride last
Ride until the roads blur
And I don’t know the street names
Or where I am
Because then I will be home
Until I am just another person traveling on this long road
On a journey to somewhere I don’t know
Until the few and far between stop lights lull me to sleep
And the stars wish me safe travels as I rush by
Until the car becomes the only friend I need
To get to my future only based on me
Based on what I want
And what I need
Until the car is my shelter
And the open road becomes my home
But until then I’ll lay in my bed
And listen to the cars speed
Knowing that one day I will make it to the open road
And the unknown will become my home
And that one day my future will only be for me
Made of my hopes and dreams
And not of those surrounding me
And on that day I will stand taller and stronger than I ever have
Knowing that all the cards I was dealt
Lies on the broken roads behind me
And the only cracks on the road ahead are where the flowers grow
Where no matter how thick the clouds are the sun will still fight to shine
So I’ll pack my sunglasses, and rain coat, and whatever else I might need
On this journey to find me
Because they’ll be days when the sun shines bright just for me
And they’ll be others where I have my own personal rain cloud
Because every once and a while you need the rain to wash away the pain
To remind you of the dark days behind you
Because the days ahead are so bright
That you forget why you fought, why you’re here today, and why you still fight
So when you hear those cars don’t dwell, don’t get sad
Look farther down the road to the days where there’s more sunshine than rain
Where the rain only comes to wash away
To remind you how good you have it
Because it is good
You can’t quit the game before you beat the boss
And save that princess trapped inside your head
Because your life paves this road
And this road is your journey
And your journey has only just begun
One last beer before Christmas
Sitting in a run down bar
Toasting Christmas' once again
Making New Years Resolutions
That in eight days I'll amend
Watching Christmas Specials
On what happened this past year
All the while waiting
For another glass of beer
Commercials for electronic this
and battery powered that
Pill that kill your acne
Machines that suck your fat
Little plastic whatzit whos
That vibrate and make noise
Not one damn ad of one damn thing
For Christmas...girls and boys
Where did Christmas go to?
When did Christmas die?
When did Amazon take over?
Telling us just the things to buy
Where is Christmas spirit?
In a movie or a play?
At an office Christmas party?
It's all saved for Boxing Day
The beer arrives, we look about
The bar is filling fast
Most talking of the better days
The days of Christmas past
People on the tv set
On that damn show TMZ
Reality folks, who don't know real
At least not like you and me
I harken back to days of yore
When Christmas was so real
When there'd be fifteen aunts and uncles
At our house for a meal
When charity was normal
Cynics..few and far between
When Christmas trees dropped needles
And all had a slight lean
Where did Christmas go to?
When did Christmas die?
When did Amazon take over?
Telling us just the things to buy
Where is Christmas spirit?
In a movie or a play?
At an office Christmas party?
It's all saved for Boxing Day
It's getting on for closing time
It's time to get on home
Where, I am not sure of
It's nice...I'll think I'll roam
A bench, perhaps, inside the park
I think I'll be all right
I'll pick one near a walkway
By a nice and shiny light
Oh, most of us are homeless
We hit the missions for our meals
We drink some down at this old bar
We just like the way it feels
We spend Christmas Day together
Our extended family grows each year
But, before I go and find a bench
I think I'll throw back one last beer
Merry Christmas
I find myself reminiscing on the days when I was a happy person.
When I smiled all the time, laughed till my sides were hurtin'.
When it didn't take much to make me giggle or even chuckle.
This mountain of a man laughing until his knees would buckle.
But lately, I don't seem to be that same old me any more.
Someone hardened my heart, I walk with my face to the floor.
With reasons few and far between I find it hard for me to smile.
Keep my children in mind to brighten me up for a while.
But that never lasts long because they soon will be gone.
Laughing and playing with their mom, where did I go wrong?
I said from death do us part, and I meant every word of it.
Then she walked out and found another man for her to covet.
Our three year old baby girl is left to just drift in the wind.
Tension between parents, wondering where does she fit in.
So her emotions are erratic not knowing how to behave.
I cry to sleep trying to figure out how her heart can be saved.
Muat be torture on an innocent soul to see the light go dim,
And it's the duty of a father to show her the light she has within.
But how do I do this standing in the shadow of a rain storm.
A frozen heart wrapped in faith trying to find the warmth.
Time to time the sun peaks out from behind black clouds.
But it isn't long before the burdens of a lifetime are abound.
On the date of my estranged wife and my anniversary
I watched the joining of a man and woman in holy matrimony.
Thought I was strong enough to put myself In that position,
But something was stirring inside me and I didn't listen.
Found myself at the bar shooting whiskey, sipping beers.
Instead asking for help through the open ears of my peers.
Drunk as can be, you could find me falling off the bar stools.
Everyone pointing and laughing at the poor drunken fool.
I just wanted to be home in that old familial picture.
Instead I was residing in an empty bottle of liquor.
Fate Of Mankind...
(this prognosticator ordains,
which if came to pass no brains)
necessary to impress any
goo goo dolls, nor swains!)
Cited in crosshairs of thermonuclear warfare
quite an about face from bursts of creativity,
yet omnipresent palpable threat everywhere
unlike sangfroid hermitage within Abbey air
habitués hosting religious peacemongers care
ring about spiritual well being, nsync by prayer
regular quotidian discipline dissociating scare
re: global apocalyptic genocidal holocaust sear
ring significant sinister malevolent electioneer
macabre mushroom clouds vitiating atmosphere
burnt offerings charred flora and fauna cohere
glommed together undifferentiated pulverized
conglomeration bespeaks devastated biosphere
survivors (if any) few and far between gallows
humor, sans mockery former Amazon billionaire
irrelevant wealth superfluous banked nightmare
*****sapiens like mummified zombies blinded by
light, eclipsed contaminated heavily sheltering sky
succor solemn deliverance bombed appallingly revere
inescapable damn earth bottled genii raiment austere
foretold prophecy regarding Doomsday clock spare
ring extra crispy char broiled ribs aplenty profiteer
awaiting her/him able to make a killing apprenticed
savvy entrepreneur opportunity, though no cashier
to pay, hence former Trumpeting strictly volunteer
job with bone fried benefits superior than Medicare
accompanied by death as fine companion buddy sincere
need not be grave concern, so minus annihilation and air
choking stench, viz total extinction moonscape sphere
flora obliterated only scorched landmarks thoroughfare,
humongous bajillion shades of gray cremated vaporware
vague hint former edifice Taj Mahal wanting consigliere
so opportunities galore to look as smoking hot fleshpot
overactive imagination helpful to conjure all in the
family Maude Lynn good times MASHup of yesteryear!
True friends, in these days and times, are few and far between
Some one to be by your side in the time of need
Some one who will lift you up when you are going through the trials of life; and
yet can understand and know how to lovingly lend a helping hand.
True friends are hard to find:
Some one who will stand with you in good and bad times
Some one who will be with you to encourage and to cheer
Some one to confide in when life's pressures make you fear.
True friends will stay with you in your troubling days-
Comforting, consoling, praying that you will overcome by the power of God's ways.
True friends are they who will be with you, sticking closer, sometime, than your
own blood sisters and brothers-
Knowing how to empathize and show you love comparable to no other.
True friends will never 'jump the ship,' bail out,' when the storms and winds of life
are tossing to and fro;
But they will ever remain by your side in strength and power assuring you that you
can grow by encouraging you through every test of time that comes-
Helping you to know that you can be victorious and be a winner as long as you
endure.
True friends will encourage you and never put you down
They will never laugh and jeer or cause added pain to life's tests and trials-
They will never make your smile turn upside down or cause you heart to cry and
in your tears be drowned.
Love and respect are key ingredients in true friends that make them free and
strong to stand with you no matter what, even if, perchance some times in your
life, things happen to be going wrong.
True friends are little "treasures" to be valued more than silver and even more
than gold
They can't be bought; can't rust or fade or neither can be sold
Because they are "blessings" from the Heart of God uplifting to the Soul of those
God's love in them have shown.
"Fragments and the crumbs of life, all the little pieces"
---John Ruskin, 1853
Pieces of a man
who used to be whole
and chock full of life.
He had a personality that shined
like the rays of a summer afternoon sun!
He had a silver tongue, to boot!
He was a man of gripping eloquence.
A gifted raconteur who captivated
the neighborhood children
with a cavalcade of stories.
He brought joy and laughter
to so many. Unfortunately, a cruel fate
has befallen him! Pieces of a man
who used to be whole; now cold and distant
An unrecognizable ghost of his old self
He has turned inward; retreated
into a shell. The gleaming smile that once
adorned his face, now faint; few and far between.
Eyes that once sparkled like Esperanza diamonds,
empty and lifeless. Who is this stranger?
What has happened to this sunshine of a man?
What became of his magnetic charm? His eloquence?
What has robbed him of his beautiful mind?
Unforgiving, the ravages of Alzheimer's disease
Pieces of a man, crumbs of a tragic life...
All The Little Pieces Poetry Contest (Winner: 1st Place)
Sponsored by Constance La France
Date written: 08/30/2020
You asked
about the world,
I see it...
all these years,
you don't know me
I hold my tongue,
afraid
if answered
safe but not sound...
My eyes, the world is
for good and evil.
Without day,
there is no night.
Without hate,
there is no love.
Without a woman,
there is no man.
it goes on and on
while the world turns.
The world,
makes me sad.
not proud to be an American
the Anti-Christ for a president.
Damaged and lost.
not a big lover of mankind.
prefer to be alone,
but connection
is important
to feel alive,
love is most.
I am a loner
People scare me.
chaos,
phoniness, bitterness,
immorality, murder,
hate, and unoriginality.
savages running around
wherever I turn.
true love?
so caught up
...it disgusts me.
I can't breathe.
I can't hide.
So much noise.
So much sorrow
Broken children, broken families.
Broken hearts, broken spirits.
Violins play
all day long....
weeping for the world.......
I wear black...
how I feel.
Of course,
Love
sees it all differently,
God
and many beautiful people out there
few and far between,
when I have the pleasure
it's powerful
Especially
having that circle of
valuing my womanhood.
I do in love.
I do in true
good,
the point of living
has touched me
no words
have been close
He's close to me,
calling me,
wanting me
like once before.
He is real.
When I was close to Him,
He painted a picture
to uplift me.
the moon.
in awe .
the beach
on a full moon night,
swimming
in the black water with you.
sunsets.
animals.
And babies.
Nothing like the sight
of a baby's smile,
and the light
Fresh, pure,
and full of hope
for the world.
AS NATURE INTENDED
This is the tale of Edward Brown, a man respected in the town.
A model of sobriety, a pillar of society.
He lived alone and, in hot weather, he’d walk around in the altogether.
With neighbours few and far between, he wasn’t likely to be seen.
And, anyway, to make quite certain, each window had a nice net curtain.
Having had a shower one night, he decided that he wasn’t quite
Ready to get into bed, and so he went downstairs instead.
First he put the kettle on and then prepared a buttered scone.
He put some cocoa in his cup and stirred it as he filled it up.
Just then he heard the front door bell; the knocker loudly knocked as well.
It gave poor Edward quite a fright; who could it be this time of night?
Standing there, completely nude, which in an old man looks quite lewd,
He realised, with a worried frown, that between him and his dressing gown,
There was a well-lit hall to pass and the front door was entirely glass.
He used his two hands to conceal those bits a man should not reveal.
But, as his hands were rather small, they really didn’t hide much at all.
He took a deep breath, made a dash, but, sadly, also made a hash.
And, running through the flood-lit hall, he tripped and had a nasty fall.
Just then he glanced towards the door and was aghast at what he saw.
For, standing there, mouth open wide, a female constable was right outside.
Panicking, he turned and fled, revealing the rear view instead.
The PC (at the wrong address) was singularly unimpressed.
Her modesty was quite offended, so Mr Brown was apprehended.
My Lord, he intended no offence. And that’s the case for the defence.
10th October 2019
Nude - Descending a Staircase Contest
Sponsor - John Lawless