Long Cross dressing Poems

Limericks VII - Naughty, Bawdy, Risque, Absurd

There continue to be modern sequels of the famous "Nantucket" limericks, including this bawdy one of mine:

There was a lewd whore from Nantucket
who intended to pee in a bucket;
but...

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Doggerel II: Doggerel about Doggerel, or, More Nonsense Verse

The Board
by Michael R. Burch

Accessible rhyme is never good.
The penalty is understood:
soft titters from dark board rooms where
the businessmen paste on their hair
and, Walter Mitties, woo the...

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The Cross-dressing of Joan d`Arc

Cross-dressing of Joan was perhaps heavily based,
On the bible’s principle in Deuteronomy 22:5 and viewed 
as a Rebellion against God. 
Tis not the putting on of a pair of pants or...

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HOME. By Ted Bundy

There is a place not far from here where purple maggots are the size of deer, pink frogs are there wearing bowties  and hats, now put your hands together for the...

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Now Buxton is the place to stay when hiking in “the Dales”,
But your schedule’s shot to pieces if you’re troubled by strong gales,
On a campsite in the Pennines the wind was blowing bitterly
I confided to...

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I just want five minutes, just to pitch
My killer screenplay for a killer film.
The hunt for a serial killer
By glamorous profilers, nothing grubby
Or exploitive. Some partial nudity,
(Only if required). There’ll be a sexy
 
Enigmatic hero....

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"50 Words for Poe: Seagulls"


He was an Albatross
She taught him Seagulls 
Another language

LAX was nothing on 
Heathrow, decision made

She had decided to catch 
a flight over to old Blighty instead
Haunt the Hell 
out of some...

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The Man who hates Israel 

Today we had lunch at a restaurant called Israel and,
 yes it was Jewish but I didn’t see an Islamist bomber
ready to blow himself and us up to King David...

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The Man who hates Israel 

Today we had lunch at a restaurant called Israel and,
 yes it was Jewish but I didn’t see an Islamist bomber
ready to blow himself and us up to King David...

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Dear Editor or Shreditor
by Michael R. Burch

Dear Ed: I don’t understand why
you will publish this other guy—
when I’m brilliant, devoted,
one hell of a poet!
Yet you publish Anonymous. Fie!

Fie! A pox on your head if you...

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So I'm sure everybody's used the text to speech thingamajig on their phones by now. It comes in so handy for me because I'm always driving and having to get in touch with my appointments...

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Just give up in comments you say.
A no talent  hack who creates attention.
But your bout to get re written in your traggic play.

A little kid hidding behind a name.
Just another loser.
In the poetry soup...

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Glitzy Santa was a cross-dressing queen
He is ridiculous!
He is crazy!
She is beautiful!
She is marvelous!
Totally obscene!  Totally wonderful!
You see our family disagreed.

Christmas is Jesus
Christmas is shopping
Christmas is cooking
Christmas is ho-ho-ho.

Well, I am ho-ho-ho, Glitzy Santa...

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Well I live in magnificent splendour
I am honoured wherever I go
I sit in my ivory tower 
And pass judgement on all those below

I criticise government actions
Though nobody elected me
I always want more and I cadge...

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Clive’s wife is out of town for the evening
so he doesn’t have a second to lose
Feeling his excitement rising 
he nervously places his first order


The late night courier delivers a huge box 
Clive frantically rips...

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