Dog Hilarious Poems

I wanted to build a skylight in my place.
My friends thought it was spurious.
So I went and built it anyway.
Now the neighbors above me are...

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Moon is my soul
Sun is my brain
That's why whenever I cry my energy drains 
When I smile it rains
And all my makeup goes in vain
I...

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Mum said "birds of a feather flock together" 
so I searched for a man who liked similar weather 
until Dad stressed "opposites attract" 
and I...

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I got freaked out the girl said. It was a wow.
I stretched my dog-ears to hear “….store now.”
She was sitting in a booth two tables...

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I'm baked
I'm baked
One toke is all it taked....

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I was thinking the other day.
What if the President came to stay.

As I set and fiddle my finger.
These questions began to linger.

I would welcome him...

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Jack and Jill went up the hill

This was never in dispute

It was how Jack fell down

With severe lacerations to his crown

That the jury had to...

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I am allergic to greens, so none of that will do.
It is my persnickety picky-eating cousin, Lulu.
But surely you are not allergic to lettuce, I...

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"Great Sculptor!
In your presence I am,
With my forehead
Touching the ground.
I am here
With entreaties
You alone can bear."
"Pour them at my feet.
But do not forget
It's ripe corns...

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Chickens clucking, pecking paths in the dust
Cow bawling for the calf who loves her bust
Turkeys gobbling, heads nodding 
Cats purring, dogs applauding
Farmers heeding, flapping hands...

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My husband is torn.
He wants a clean house.
But he loves our big puppy.
The chewingest dog in the whole dang town.

He says I guess I should...

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In the early dawn, the loud barking of my dog
Woke me up;
I arose and went to the door leading out onto
The veranda;
I adjusted the blinds...

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Adorned in her Christmas Eve negligee, on a promise for her Christmassy treat
Dog-tired Mr Claus, his mojo stuck on pause, left Mrs C feeling incomplete

Written...

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Does an eager hand feel a throbbing heartbeat truly divine
making a lover's promise under a swaying, balmy pine?
Why look at blinking stars that aren't amazingly...

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Different Days
A day like no other for several reasons
I found out my wife is a man with a hidden 

A day like no other for...

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