Mother so kind,
I see myself in you, the worst parts
Do I tear them from me? Do I tear them from you?
Your blood, your flesh I bear
So Do I tear myself too?
Mother so gentle,
My life to you I offer,
Clay from your bones, mould from your skin
But still I sculpted myself an imposter
My cracks shattered me in the kiln
Mother so wise,
I question every part of me,
Every atom loathing for your assurance
Why cant I be like you? Divine and holy
Why must I end up in the worst kind of penance?
Mother so vicious,
What did you dream of? Why aren't you free?
I'd undo every part of me, cease to exist, simply to see your eyes smile
But in darkness youve built your home, and to there you shall flee
Stealing from me ny ecstacy, turning me putrid, so vile
Mother so mine,
Youre my guiding light, dimmed so dark
In my somber end, will you kindly lead my wretched soul?
Bound by you, forever an appendage, forever so stark
Ill die at peace incomplete, but I cant live whole
When the magic spell is broken and the fog begins to lift.
And the heat of the day breaks through and clarity is no longer adrift.
The damp quickly dries and the light erases doubt.
No longer in the comforting mist things are so clear they shout.
It takes a while to exit that mist when its rose colored glasses you wear.
And its grief you experience because even so you still care.
So stop and smell the roses, feed the soul, sooth the heart.
A new day has dawned and with it a new start.
When the magic spell is broken. - Artimus (C) Susan Manley 11/3/2009
These hands don’t do half of what they could, what they should.
I blame them instead of myself.
Seems easier somehow.
The Fruit of Disappointment
In my garden there is a tree that I planted when it was new,
It was just a tiny sapling then and grew and grew and grew.
But on this tree, although very high, of fruit there were far too few
'Till an ancient gardener spoke to me and told me what to do.
He said, “Find a nest of the Scritch Scratch bird and take a twig or two
And make a posset of Dwindle Weed and a pot of Norridge stew.”
I found Dwindle Weed and a Norridge Plant for the recipe he knew
And with the gathered twigs around the tree a circle I then drew.
Into the circle, as the old man told, the mixture I then threw.
“Now,” he said, “You must wait a year and there'll be fruit for you.”
“Fifty pounds is all I need, then I'll return when the fruit is due.”
No fruit set upon that tree and for many years was overdue.
The ancient gardener did not return and so I thought, “I'll sue.”
But the gardener was never found, or the fifty pounds I blew.
Barry Stebbings
29/10/16
I'm going to make you proud is what i told my dad
as i headed to the coast
with the dreams of most
i came up here with a dream i had
but i did not fulfill that dream
and for that i am sorry dad
instead of focusing on school
i thought i would be cool
do what everyone else did
now i am pregnant
i wanted so much to make you proud of me dad
but i see i disappointed you
i made you really sad
i don't know what to say for myself
i am so ashamed
its time to face the facts and stop playing games
now all i can think of is what am i going to do
he said I'm here and i'm going to stick by you
but daddy i don't believe that is really true
we are both still young and got a whole life ahead
you told me
you made this mess now you have to lie in your bed
i know i am stupid for what i did
and now all i can think is should i have an abortion
or should i keep the kid?
daddy i hope you will love me with whatever decision i make
because i know either way this is all hard to take
i know i have disappointed you but please don't write me off
you mean everything to me daddy
you are my rock
I
Wished
Upon a star
And guess what
My dreams didn't come true
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