Two years ago, our story closed,
Yet you lingered in the margins.
Two months ago, in a darkened theatre,
You held my hand like a secret kept,
A love hidden from another love.
I thought it was a return,
But it was only a hiding place —
You wanted the comfort of my yesterday,
While promising someone else tomorrow.
Today, I no longer check the stars for us,
I check my own worth.
And it whispers back, clear and calm:
I deserve more than a love shown in the dark.
I deserve a love that can stand in the light.
I am strong,
I am in control,
Today is my day —
I wrote this on the 10th of May.
On the 26th, I waited.
Two days before nineteen,
I did not want gifts,
Only love, only care, only effort.
A long wish at 12.
On the 28th, it was my birthday.
The clock struck 12, he did not.
At 6:30, a formal happy birthday arrived,
And it hurt me a lot that day.
I wrote my faults that night:
Overthinking,
Overloving,
Over-expecting.
But today I know,
Loving too much was never a fault.
Waiting for love at midnight was never too much.
My only fault was calling my love a fault.
stoic expression
though prickly thorns stabbed her breast
silent suffering
lingering sorrow
memories drift unbidden
closure is denied
Season of death
Told to fear
Before bitter cold
Making everyone scream
For some warmth
And loving touch
Stay in touch
After the death
With some warmth
And no fear
Morbid many scream
Awaiting the cold
Decide embrace cold
With forceful touch
Hear the scream
Proclaiming the death
Eyes express fear
Needing some warmth
Getting the warmth
Fighting the cold
And the fear
With caring touch
Defeating ugly death
That creates a scream
Why a scream?
All filled warmth
Body shell death
Purple silver cold
Ghosts need touch
Soothe the Fear
Dispense the fear
Memories laughing scream
Everyone seems touch
Words igniting warmth
Melting the cold
Celebrating the death
Conquering fear death
Instead scream warmth
When touch cold
I brush my pen to hone,
Knowing the time I spent for you would never be alone.
For him I cherish, not the bond we embellish,
Where my sin once found it sweet,
Let my poem heal for you to repeat.
Suffering the wrath of my walls,
Shielding me in your arms,
Holding me tight as you poured out your soul,
Shrinking the sand that slips through your palms.
Avoiding the love that you once found,
Thankful for this day as time goes by,
Waving to the love I lost, we say our goodbyes.
Nothing left to change, no excuses to turn the page.
Cold mirror frozen
Knows sorrowful sinful past
Wondering lost mind
A red ruby fire shine bright
Melting the reflective ice
After all that’s happened
I never sat down to think.
I always wanted to push forward
and never looked back.
Who wants to sit down with pain?
Especially when all it does is hurt you.
It showed me parts of me I don’t like
and I try not to blame you.
Some days I curse you under my breath.
I daydream about if things had worked?
Then I get nightmares about doing that.
I try to think past the what ifs and
Accept what happened between us.
If I had the power to either forget you,
Or make you love me like I love you.
I’d choose to forget you.
Gasoline doesn’t control a dying flame.
You cut me deeply where the wound
Still feels the sear of your burning knife
As it thrusts right into my back,
With smoke burning my throat as it escapes
Despite all the pain, I don’t hold onto it.
Where would there be room for love,
If I choose to keep hating you?
Maybe we could’ve been friends,
If things didn’t turn out this way.
I can’t say I’m glad or upset that
We met under these circumstances.
All I have to say is, thank you
And I wish you good luck with
Everything.
Closure
Closure isn't such a bad thing, It just reveals
Someone 's true reality of one's character.
To put a short depravity to this even shorter
story; I think Closure comes when you stop
looking for it.
Not the door that closed without warning
Sometimes the Closure isn't an explanation,
It's acceptable occasionally, You may never
get the answers you're looking for.
Closure is unemotional that they'll never give you candor, a plea or confirmation one deserves.
You think those things will help you move on?
I know you may want closure, But it's
Accepting that their silence was their answer.
Aichi, I wrote three poems with you.
A total of 107,000 steps,
and three heavy suitcases when I left.
An antique store I wandered into
no photos allowed,
but for an antique enthusiast,
it lives vividly in my memory.
The vintage watch I almost bought,
that cameo necklace I kept staring at,
the no-tripod rule at the Ghibli park,
the pink dial I didn’t take home,
and the clock I arrived too late to see.
Aichi, you made me realize
that money always finds its way back
but time never does.
From the postcards I printed
to the cherry blossoms drifting quietly,
the theme song echoing in bright aisles,
and the first treasures I carried home.
But more than anything
it was the wind against my face,
whispering hope,
telling me we can always become
who we choose to be.
————
Thank you, Aichi
you leave quietly,
But you will always have
a special place in my heart.
We chase so many things in life closure is one of them
Untitled
And the wind
tastes so bitter
And the rain
washes away the memory
And you there with oblivious words
Fade away with the storm
My heart breaks
over his indifference.
He sweeps past me
as though I am nothing -
nothing,
as though I am invisible,
eyes brimming with hope,
with love.
My heart breaks.
Perhaps I am invisible to Him.
Perhaps I am unimportant.
Yet to me, he is the opposite.
Oh my,
this bloody boy -
my only propulsion.
My heart shatters,
shatters in pieces.
My eyes burn,
burn from tears -
tears without end,
dropping from my eyes
like a silent English shower.
My heart shatters.
I see it now:
he made it clear.
I am nothing.
He doesn’t care.
He never did.
I was foolish…
My foolish heart is broken.
I believed in love.
He wrote me -
but why?
He cared.
I know it to be so.
Yet he fooled me.
My foolish heart is broken.
Never to be fixed.
I give you my word,
you, otherworldly boy -
I will never fall for it,
fall for this insidious feeling,
other fools call love.
Some people never see their part,
They point the finger, not the heart.
They say, “You could’ve talked to me,”
But silence felt like sanity.
You try to speak, they twist your truth,
Turn calm to chaos, proof to proof.
They shift the blame, rewrite the scene,
Until you doubt what you have seen.
Conversations start to drain,
You pour your peace, but none remains.
They say they want what’s real and true,
But call it rude when truth comes through.
They love the truth that keeps them right,
But hide from any honest light.
They don’t seek peace they seek control,
And call you wrong when they lose hold.
So, stop the fights that never end,
You don’t need closure to transcend.
Pick quiet grace above the fuss,
And guard the calm that lives in us.
Not every story need repair,
Some endings bloom from walking there
Away from noise, from pain, from spin,
Choose peace and let the light begin.
Oh summer for you I weep
as winter now begins to creep
the warmth of days gone by
a memory with a big sigh
Oh trees of summer so green
now the colour is a dream
trees all barren and brown
leaves fallen in a mound
Oh summer for you I weep
as winter now begins to creep
soon comes a coat of white
covering everything in sight
all you wanted was the closure i never got
when you expressed the will to reunite
your crime was to abandon us at a time
when the need for a savior was too high
i got your message and plea in my court
you stood like a fool and defended your crime
calling my convictions a theatrical show
and apologizing in the end after stabbing a dagger
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