Best Zapped Poems
When Martians landed from outer space
They requested to meet a world leader
So Donald arrived with a smirk on his face
But soon turned green with an alien fever
The Martians decided to probe his brain
to see if they could cure his malaise
Their readings showed that he was insane
so they zapped him with powerful rays
Donald started to twitter deliriously
but the Martians understood every word
They didn’t believe he’s taken seriously
as his tweeting was totally absurd
The Martians communicated with telepathy
Using thoughts no one could understand
An interpreter was called immediately
and declared that as leader he’s banned
A torrent of tears fell from poor Donald’s eyes
His orange skin turned an odd shade of grey
The Martians usurped Donald and to his surprise
Their first earth words were ‘have a nice day’
The Martians decreed immediate world peace
And that we must all live in perfect harmony
We must love one another, all wars have to cease
No current world leader even dared to disagree
Latest news on Donald is he’s now in a better place
He sits in his rocking chair with a grin on his face
Take me to your leader Contest
Sponsored by Caren Krutsinger
8/6/18
Categories:
zapped, america, humorous, silly, space,
Form:
Rhyme
I have no spirit.
I have no soul.
I am nothing more than a terrible troll.
I’ll never see Heaven,
And this is my Hell,
To be shunned by all men and the fair mademoiselle.
I was made by a madman,
Assembled from parts
Of decaying cadavers, and life from a spark.
My twisted existence
Of needles and thread,
Malodorous materials from realms of the dead.
I entered this world
One dark stormy night,
My creator’s repugnance foretelling my plight.
I opened my eyelids
As lightning bolts zapped,
With howling of winds and thunderous claps.
I was thrust into light.
I knew darkness and cold.
I was thirsty and hungry, a sight to behold.
A blind man took pity.
I did not offend.
He was my one unconditional friend.
And then he was gone,
But I needed someone,
A partner to witness what I had become.
I wanted affection,
But all that I fetched
Was fear and revulsion for this awful wretch.
All I desired
Was someone to share
Ups and downs of a life filled with sorrow and care.
Alas! My creator
Reneged on our deal.
In spite of my honest and urgent appeal,
He butchered my bride.
I butchered his, too.
But first I killed Henry. That day he will rue.
The way I’d been treated
Only heightened my rage.
Yet my maker perished before the last page.
Soon I discovered
That I could not die.
I’ve lasted for decades. Death I defy.
And my punishment still,
As a tragic outcast,
Is to walk among gravestones of people who’ve passed.
Categories:
zapped, destiny, feelings, horror,
Form:
Rhyme
"There are some who bring a light so great to the
world that even after they have gone the light remains."
_Unknown
Anniversary
beautiful
charm dangles ever from
glittering heirloom
idyllic juju
keepsake
lovely memories
necklace ornament
palpates
quiet recollections
sorrow terrible
unbidden
valediction withdrawal
xoxo
yearnings zapped
_____________________
September 08, 2022
Poetry/ABC/Husband's Death
Copyright Protected, ID 06-1486-133-08
All Rights Reserved, 2022, Constance La France
Written for the Standard contest, Anniversary
sponsor, Sara Kendrick, Judged 10/16/2022
First Place
Categories:
zapped, anniversary, death, husband,
Form:
ABC
Today I saw a pesky fly
He buzzed around all day …
Until he landed on my lunch
So I zapped him with fly spray!
Now you’re really in the sky
Rest in peace little fly
Jan Allison
9th November 2014
Categories:
zapped, humorous, insect,
Form:
Rhyme
Once, it was a time of true magic,
when the world was small and soft.
It had to be magic, my mind of five told me:
how else could my brothers and I go to sleep
on an ordinary, dull and quiet night...
to awaken in sheer joy the next morn
as though we had been zapped by a warm
bolt of harmless lightning--
setting our now restless bodies tingling.
Like racehorses at the gate of magic,
we stood at the top of the stairs,
pulling at whatever patience we could muster
under the admonitions of Mom and Dad to wait!--
wait! the camera must be loaded-- but how very
painful it was to be still when we knew that
children's paradise was a stairway away--
and what a paradise we saw unfolded
in our now unfamiliar living room!
The tree drew our eyes first--it was big and fat,
with its branches sagging under the great weight
of all its myriad ornaments: glass balls and sweets
and plastic candy canes and tinsel drooping as though
it hung on a some forsaken weeping willow instead of
a tall, proud Blue Spruce : and millions and millions
and millions of colored lights, blinking relentlessly,
made our tree sparkle like the royal crown of a giant king--
perhaps the King of Toys, for toys were seen everywhere
we looked: cars ,trucks , bikes, games, bats-- and balls!
Each brother ran quickly to his own precious pile
(we marveled how thoughtful Santa must be)
and knew in each pile would be some boxes
beautifully wrapped but sans treasure,
holding only socks or shirts, perhaps a sweater--
well, even the jolly fat man could not be perfect--
still, he brought magic to our dull house every year,
transforming our prosaic lives into poetry overnight
by wonder, by magic, by love....
And when he went away, when I was an ancient six,
the world grew much bigger but colder,
dull and empty of that special joy that can only come
to those children who believe....
[Note: This bittersweet poem was also bittersweet to write, as losing childhood itself is bittersweet.]
rec'd n/a in Regina McIntosh's contest, 12/18/20
Categories:
zapped, allegory, celebration, children, christmas,
Form:
Free verse
Year after year, young people inspire me.
The freshness of youth brings forth curiosity.
Diversity and personality scream, it seems –
Noisily, boisterously, playfully, hope knocks.
Each child has amazing talents to unlock.
Shy ones work in silence while some classmates tease.
Others squirm around on a whim and a breeze.
Did you guess? I am a substitute teacher.
I learn something new every day that I work.
I guess you might say it is a hidden perk.
I love my work and I love to learn from many.
There was one high school boy
A class leader who loved to rap –
Talking, laughing, rapping; class behavior zapped.
I saw impending disruption; So, I struck a deal.
My clever solution was a bit surreal.
When everyone finished their work, he could rap.
Work first, then fun was my motto; he took charge.
His group of "homies” got to work right away.
The classroom was silent that wonderful day.
So, just as I promised, ten minutes at the end,
He started a beat others joined from their seat.
Line upon line he rapped words with rhyme.
Then, point to a classmate who would rap in time.
It was so much fun to see faces aglow.
When he pointed to me, I used poetry.
From that day forward, when he was in my class,
He would ask me to write a class poem, alas.
They would give me a topic and a few key words.
The students worked first; then, my poem was heard.
They would listen to my poems line after line.
I can still see his face after all of these years.
The sparkle in his eyes untangled my fears.
Years later, I was bored out of my mind.
My hip disintegrated; I was confined.
What would I do? The answer, I could not find.
I remembered that boy and that he liked my work.
It was his and his classmates’ reactions –
They influenced me to take writing action.
I joined Poetry Soup; poetry became a love affair.
I met friends, studied forms and wrote anywhere.
Paper towels or notebook paper, it mattered not.
When away from my computer, I would jot.
That boy brought the beginning; self-confidence.
His cheery influence blessed me with lifetime joy.
They liked my poems; so, I wrote thousands more.
All of this because of one young boy who will never know,
It was his good-word raps that set my soul aglow.
March 8, 2017
Written for the Poetry Contest - Younger People Who Have Inspired You
Categories:
zapped, inspirational, teacher, youth,
Form:
Rhyme
Poet Destroyer vs. James Gareth
Are you done taking your nap?
I read a few of your poems
You got it wrong, they are not crap
First I want to thank you, for the extra lap
Glad, I inspired another slam out of you
I'm not ready to toss in the cap
It takes a bigger plot to get me upset
Your ego fell into my poetic trap
While you came out of the closet,
wearing M.C. Hammer pants
Your headstone now reads "You lost it!"
The vulture's on your body tap, tap, tap!
On your corpse, they pile up their crap
"Sorry!" I zapped you with my taser gun,
zap, zap, zap!
That's what you got for raising your pen.
You hit me with words, like a gypsy queen
Don't want to be enemies, nor friend.
You say I am sweet like a flower.
No magic cure, no poetic power.
I can be as sweet as they come.
If by any chance you are the jealous one.
I'll tell you what,
does it matter if I kiss the ladies butt?
It's not your fault you are not hot.
I'll wait for you to leave the kitchen,
The heat in here is what you don't get.
Hang up your gloves, put away your pen.
Your words of yesterday, slowly rot.
I will take your Hakius.
Release them like creatures.
They sound like insults to Mother Nature.
What if? I turned over a new leaf
Will you stop saying, I'm the crooked police!
I will no longer be an investigator.
I have no need to destroy you.
I have no force like Darth Vader.
I'm kind of getting bored of this
I will read you later alligator.
"I'll be back!"
As The Terminator once said
(FUN) No feelings were hurt in the making.
If you are following
(read poem by JAMES GARETH--To the POET Destroyer)
Categories:
zapped, anger, anti bullying, me,
Form:
Free verse
Agile
Black
Cats
Dart
Eerily
From
Gloomy
Hallways
Initiating
Jolts -
Killing
Lackadaisical
Moods
Notably
Of
People
Quintessentially
Ruffled -
Spooking
Them
Unduly -
Verifying
Wanted
Xenial
Yearnings
ZAPPED
Nov. 9, 2021
for William Kekaula's Alphabet Soup Poetry Contest
Categories:
zapped, cat,
Form:
Abecedarian
Once upon a time...
Once upon a time, in France, a storyteller fella
Wrote of a girl named Cinderella,
Meant as a fairy tale romance.
Her daddy died when she was young, and she was forced to share his riches
With three monumental b****es,
A most unhappy circumstance.
For years her stepmom and stepsibs made her perform a menial's duty,
And as she blossomed into beauty,
They grew more hateful, mean, and cruel.
Each night they dined on fine cuisine and wore lace dresses with silk sashes,
While she wore rags begrimed with ashes,
And got just crusts of bread and gruel.
Then one day a herald from the king demanded entry
To the homes of landed gentry,
They were invited one and all.
It was the prince's eighteenth birthday, and the king and queen were harried
Because their son was not yet married.
Ergo, the reason for the ball.
The stepsisters primped and preened and wild excitement they exuded,
When Cindy asked to be included, they gaped at her as if appalled.
Stepmother sneered, "Look here, I'll show you!"
With self-righteous indignation,
"Your name's not on the invitation.
Just we elite are so installed."
So Cinderella went downstairs to seek some solace in the kitchen,
But 'stead of sittin' there and b****in', she started dancing with a broom.
She whirled and twirled around the floor,
Or else she'd stand there, gently swaying,
As if an orchestra was playing
Pretending they were bride and groom.
And then a flash, a crash of thunder, and to Cindy's stunned amazement,
There gliding through the kitchen casement,
A pudgy lady dressed in blue.
She said, "Hello, my dear, no fear, I'm here to grant your secret wishes,
I'll wave my wand and clear the dishes,
And make a princess out of you!"
She waved and tapped and flicked and zapped,
And what she seemed to make the air do
Was give her make-up, nails, and hair-do,
And then to make the look complete,
Out of those rags so soiled and worn and far too torn to drown a cat in,
A gown of gossamer and satin, and crystal slippers on her feet.
Without this timely intervention, Cindy's tale might have been tragic.
Could she have managed without magic,
And her dilemma be resolved?
But everybody knows what happened with a gourd and six white mice,
And how a smudgy scullery maid was made to clean up really nice,
When a fairy got involved.
To be continued...
Categories:
zapped, humor,
Form:
Light Verse
Insomnia can sometimes be my friend
Its where many a poem begin and end
Ideas are hatched – some I’ll even keep
While tossing and turning, chasing sleep
But insomnia can also be a curse
Mountainous mole holes look even worse
I dread the morning arriving too soon
Knowing my energy will be zapped before its noon
But, try as I may, I can’t put her off
She invades my body like a persistent cough
I lie awake when I should be not
That sandman refuses to be caught
I have a tired body but a restless mind
Relaxation techniques I cannot find
My dreams are waiting for me to doze
Perhaps tonight – for the sun has rose
Categories:
zapped, life, body,
Form:
Rhyme
Snatched and grabbed, reefed off me horse,
Just crossed over the watercourse,
Big white light it came and got,
Zapped me, jerked me up aloft,
A bloody flying saucer.
Saw the circle spinning disk,
With panels from one did whisk,
Beam of light had done the job,
In me pocket, thirty bob?
Darkness came within my head,
Aliens, bug eyed did me force,
Anger burned hot instead,
Tucker had, no bloody sauce?
New planet appeared with a jolt ,
Purple haze was a taking holdt
Pink of sky with glass buildings clear,
An orange sun was setting here,
Bugeye came and led me in,
To the glassy citadel,
Hover beds without support,
Lifted up no bed clothes sport,
A specimen in their jar,
Often watched and fed bizarre,
Jabbering bugs saw something rare,
Aussie drongo with whiskers there.
Not Just Any Sunset
Sponsored by: Paula Swanson
Categories:
zapped, adventure, me, light, light,
Form:
Rhyme
OUR LOVE TURNED COLD
This fluff I pluck,
sew, trim and tuck.
I’m in a rush —
Now, man, do hush!
I’m tired and sick.
So stop it — quick!
Tell me you’ll miss
our time of bliss.
A fish you’ll catch —
our love won’t patch.
To doom your apt.
My mind is zapped.
I’d love to blush —
feel love’s red rush,
the hue of plum.
...I’ll gorge on rum!
O days your quest —
leaned on my breast…
Now, love, I race
to grab the mace.
Oh how we’d spoon
‘neath the blest moon,*
on the pink beach —
stars we can’t reach…
Missed days of sun,
ink from eyes run.
Long lines of prose.
Brrr..cold words froze.
Now we say bye.
Man, don’t you cry!
See, I’ve moved on.
This is no con.
2/1/2018
128 Words Contest
4 - 1 syllable words per line/32 lines
Sponsor: Silent One
*howmanysyllables.com listing this line as 3 syllables but it is 4
Categories:
zapped, break up, emotions,
Form:
Rhyme
Its feet are tiny dimeter,
Body, spirit, soul, trimeter,
Would you look at those ears and eyes
Whose tetrameter rhyme defies
Its foot with pentameter toes,
Smelled by monometer nose!
Don’t fret when its iamb voice speaks
Cheerful quatrains for days and weeks.
Stand still while it jabbers spondee,
In stanzas of metered trochee.
Well, my friend, please do not pretend,
Or you’ll cause more stress at the end.
Each verse it speaks is oh, so sweet
For it’s growing Longfellow feet!
Sit back, relax, put on a smile,
You’ve been zapped by a poet’s grandchild!
Categories:
zapped, on writing and words
Form:
Quatrain
There was a young lady named Rose,
who developed a run in her hose.
When her big toe stuck out;
she got zapped with the gout:
Now what Rosie does best,
is to limp all about.
Categories:
zapped, character, girl, humor, nonsense,
Form:
Limerick
Angels sit on top of Christmas trees
Bells ring for baby Jesus’ birth. Can you hear?
Candy canes or cookies if you please.
Decorate your home with Christmas cheer.
Excitement builds and there’s exhaustion too!
Festive families have fun in the snow.
Generous are they with gifts and all they do,
Happy - waiting for St. Nick’s Ho! Ho! Ho!
Illumination shows on every street.
Jack Frost comes along, but I will be
Kissing under mistletoe - so sweet,
Loving my December thoroughly.
Magic times! Perhaps you’ll see a fairy!
Nice or naughty? Santa makes his list.
Opening our presents, we’ll be merry.
Parties of the season can’t be missed!
Quince pudding tastes so fine with cinnamon.
Rum cake for me! Pa rum pum pum pum!
Stockings filled by Santa - oh, what fun.
Turkey, stuffing, and potatoes. YUM!
Uplifting messages and songs we’ll play.
Visits to our relatives we’ll make -
Wishes too, for a white Christmas day;
Xmas time, be good for goodness sake!
Yuletide logs are burning. Turn in for the night.
Zapped of energy, get Zzzzz's! May all your dreams be bright.
Written in January of 2016 For the Contest of Shadow Hamilton
Categories:
zapped, christmas,
Form:
Abecedarian