Best Wee Wee Poems

Small is sometimes a good thing
However these words of wisdom I do not bring
The wee of the wise
Sometimes we look to the skies
Relief in our...

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A man with a quiet demeanor
was cursed with a miniscule wiener.
He tried lotions and pills
But not one cured his ills.
Now he's a silent nail hole...

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I am a super duper Gerber Baby
all I love to do is wee- wee
winning all the attention of my mommy
so that all day long, she’ll...

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The bats in the steeple were feeding on people
By sucking the blood splattered wood
That came from the coffin a vampire dropped off in
When he’d drunk...

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For loo rolls some shoppers are vying 
and people are seen panic buying
The shelves are now empty
When once there was plenty
Stockpiling - there is no...

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(after Edgar Allan Poe's "The Angel of the Odd")

It was a tidy day and I sat, replete, under vellux blankets.
Sadly, my tea was weak, the...

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Pinhead Lizard
Ever since he was a young boy
He played with balls of fire
From church halls to Soho brothels
He must have had them all
Aint seen nothing...

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Someone is consumed with anger and has gone mad
Venting fitful words of ire ...how childish; how sad
Like a flock of loud crows
The noisy blah blah...

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counting one to
ten this time thumbs
included but no matter
that she served them on
a silver platter i wanted none

standing on
wooden floor
boards i asked
her to sit and...

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The town drunk felt a dire need to wee-wee!

     In the park he found a sycamore tree.

    ...

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These grown ups drive me crazy.
Da-da. Their silly talk is all so hazy.
Look at her, what does she gain?
Da-da she repeats over and over again.

I...

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Little boy in myth
Standing pee on his wee wee
Glass of beer for free...

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I find myself stuck in my thoughts with no exit in sight,
Lost in a darkness that has over shadowed my light. 
Relyin on memories, which...

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My Mother
Mary Ann Dow Gardiner

Mary Ann Dow Stuart wis her maiden name,
Noo, she wisnae a Scoatish Lass o' fame.
Born in nineteen hunner an' five on...

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Devonshire tea with Peter an' Beryl, beware,
it's no the fact that Peter disnae care.
But 88 years doon the track o' life,
an' 84 years fur Beryl,...

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