Best Stew Poems


The Psychedelic Stew

THE PSYCHEDELIC STEW 
 
We loved to drive out through the hills 
Where landscapes are so green, 
And always sought the smell of hay 
That seemed so fresh and clean. 
 
We'd rent a cosy cottage there 
Around that time each year, 
The days and nights were magical 
And life was full of cheer. 
 
That night we planned a simple tea 
A good old country stew, 
With fresh grown mushrooms we had picked 
As 'round the place they grew. 
 
Those mushrooms seemed much larger then 
The ones we'd norm'lly find, 
But in they went with all the rest, 
We really did not mind. 
 
Our stew was just the best we'd had 
On that we did agree, 
Then sitting back and quite content 
Enjoyed a cup of tea. 
 
When suddenly, in front of us,  
Our kitchen came to life 
With antics never seen before; 
Sure terrified my wife. 
 
She sat and watched with fear filled eyes 
For both her knife and fork, 
Were standing up and quite erect 
And both of them could walk. 

The kitchen curtains did a jig 
And plates flew 'round the room, 
Our mop then left its corner spot 
To line dance with the broom. 
 
Old teapot sang and clapped its hands, 
The tea cups joined in too. 
My mind it boggled at the sight 
and wondered what to do. 
 
I grabbed the phone and dialled for help 
That soon was on its way; 
Though not before the pots and pans 
Had all began to play. 
 
Poor doctor tried to calm us down 
Enquiring of our plight. 
We mentioned what had taken place, 
The horrors of that night. 
 
He summed up what had taken place, 
The answer he now knew, 
We'd eaten mushrooms which produced, 
A psychedelic stew.

Premium Member Bad Stew - Warning: Explicit Poo Content

I have the outhouse in view
I had grandma’s squirrel stew
Dessert was a tart
I will not dare fart
I will sit in my own pew

*in honor of Jan's Birthday tomorrow*

Emotional Stew

What is emotional stew, you ask
Describing that is in itself a task 

It's a motley mix of chunks and bits
In a pot of feelings where everything fits

Sometimes the batter will taste so sweet
When joy and relief make up the meat

The stew can be peppered with many a spice
Like anger, frustration, and stubborn rice

Or a salty blend with sauce of tears
When sadness combines with multiple fears

The results may yield just one small fault
If you add boredom and apathy without any salt

The coals beneath are stoked to perfection
After dumping in your emotional selection

The stew will boil as the feelings grow
Just mind the mixture, don't let it overflow!


Poetry Stew

Poetry stew.


My poetry stew has ingredients of goo

The ass end of a warm drink

The chaser for an anti depressant capsule

A five o' clock shadow 

A hangover and panic attacks

The tears of a psychiatrist 

Blood from the hands of an ugly poet 

A terrified suicide 

A kiss never sober 

New York City blues and a trip to a toilet after every drink

A friendly goodbye 

A stool at the bar with your faith written all over it

Cum soaked napkins that turn yellow like your dying skin 

Pathetic messages from people who don't know what you've been through 

My fellow punks and beats, modern day philosophers 

A strait jacket that fits

A functioning psychotic 

A poet with messy hair who hates his reflection

Get me out of here 

The lovely taste of a depressed man

Everyone gets a shot 

Everyone gets a taste 

Everyone can have a drink

Enjoy or be sane.

Homemade Stew

A stuffy nose leads to runny nose, frozen toes and thick as jelly mucus
sitting in your chest not allowing you to rest, mucus really sucks because there is nothing you can do but suck on lozenges and say aw nuts - 
sitting on the couch all afternoon
watching cartoons run across your living room 
listening to geese fly by 
thinking is it time to lie down and rest 
just take a breath and maybe two. 
My lungs feel like they have ingested glue 
they huff and puff to no avail 
so off to the kitchen I go to warm a big huge heaping bowl of...
touch of magic, toad tongues stew, a pinch of nutmeg, thyme for two - what are some homemade remedies that work for you?

Premium Member Possum Stew

To weigh him hold him by tail
   Six pounds fresh not stale
   Skin if not and toss in pot
          Diced red potato      
         Large ripe tomato
           Cook him slow  
                   Oh!       

Copyright © 2011  By Caryl S. Muzzey

Twelfth Place Winner ~ "Low Country Boil” Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Sara Kendrick
Aug. 15, 2011


Witch's Stew

Witches have wacky tastebuds, as this poem will tell!

Cup of eel eyes
Cup of toad tongue
Cup of snakeskin, too.
Boil twenty minutes-
Recipe for Witch's Stew!

Bonus activity: Have children write their own recipe for "Witch's Stew" (rhyming recipe not necessary!). Tell them a good "Witch's Stew" should include 3-5 ghoulish ingredients. You may also have children draw (or draw and label) their ingredients and/or draw a picture of a bowl or a pot of the stew, with all of the ghoulish ingredients they chose swimming around the top.

Premium Member Hey Waiter, There's a Fly In My Stew

There was once a finicky chap named Lou,

     Who espied a fly swimming in his stew!

          Said the waiter to the bloke,   

               "What a fantastic backstroke!

                    He won't eat much and will leave some for you!"

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2014 All Rights Reserved

Making Beef Stew Haiku

beef stew bubbles right
my stomach anticipates
the great warm goodness
© Marty King  Create an image from this poem.

Halloween Poem # 9..Witch's Stew?

There was an old witch who was stewing
She didn't know what she was doing
To make it complete
She stirred with her feet
I think she should just stick to brewing
© Deb Wilson  Create an image from this poem.

Premium Member New York-Style Hungarian Stew

NEW YORK-STYLE HUNGARIAN STEW

In the darkest corner of her living room, 
she waits to eat. A stone’s throw away, 
her ex lives with their kids, his goulash 
wafting reek into her open windows. 

Through the one in her master bedroom, 
the man could easily catch sight of his successor 
swaddled in goose-down, identical in color 
to the old comforter she could see, if she cared to, 

just beyond her window, on the bed where 
she’d been fed, “I’ll cherish you always.” 
Abutting that room, the den with surround-
sound TV, where the vulgarian had charmed 

the panties off her during commercials, turning 
up his volume so she could grasp every syllable 
of his accented endearments, his excuses. 
Adjacent, their son and daughter’s rooms 

(now, with suitcases the children bring back 
and forth each weekend); and down the hall, 
the state-of-the art kitchen where her louse ex 
still plays chef. How she’d wished he’d played 

spouse with as much know-how and gusto. Oh, 
how he’d cooked and cooked their goose, served it 
up every chance he got, till she got good and fed 
up and fled to an old flame in a brownstone 

across the way — where, at this very moment, she sits 
with the stench of the dish her ex is, no doubt, cooking 
to death, and the essence of her Crock-pot stew 
cooking up a storm, inextricably mesh.

Premium Member Beef Stew

I sit at my computer musing and trying to compose meaningful verse.
Try as I might with Shakespearian panache my lines to intersperse,
With profound nuggets of enlightenment to attain universal fame,
My concentration is lost in a fog, like an ever-changing movie frame!

I suppose I could blame this dilemma on my dear, long-suffering spouse.
She's cooking beef stew for supper - the aroma is wafting about the house!
Now, how am I to concentrate on versifying when my palate is just itchin',
To delve into that delectable ambrosia she's slaving over in the kitchen!

Ah! I can hardly wait to taste that mouth-watering olio awaiting me!
She makes the best in town, tossing all kinds of stuff in that potpourri!
Of course there is the best of beef that she has tenderized and diced,
And the scrumptious gravy with exotic herbs she has liberally spiced!

She adds sweet peas, a tolerable amount of corn and russet pertaters,
And just enough onions for my taste, green peppers and fresh termaters!
Green beans, carrots and a tad of celery top off this fantastic brew!
Le Cordon Bleu Chef at the Ritz dare not concoct a more elegant stew!

Alas, I've wasted all afternoon trying to hatch up some credible rhyme,
But my thoughts have been consumed with that ragout laced with thyme!
Ah! My wife announces supper is ready so I'm gonna load my plate!
That poetic masterpiece I had in mind today will just have to wait!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

This Stew Tastes Funny

The prompt was "Write a poem which is really a recipe".

This Stew Tastes Funny

I personally like to use the more established dramatic processes, but feel free to use your own version of comedy!

Dramedy (serves the whole family!)

Take the character, drive them headfirst
into a community of oppositions
that inexplicably attract,
cue a flurry of activity, sprinkled lightly.
Leave no weaknesses un-attacked.
When the conflict begins to rise,
place them in roles reversed,
have them recognise
that conflict yields no prize.
Leave the melting pot to cool
until each moralistic monologue ends with cheap slapstick verse.

Credit to Adam Sandler.
© Dylan Wong  Create an image from this poem.

Cod Fish Stew

Cod Fish Stew

Ocean fresh with onions only enhanced Dad's delicious dish

11/11/2015


~ For Andrea's Food & Our Memory Connections contest ~

Humanity Stew

We're all ingredients in the humanity stew
The sad clowns
The prescription abusers
The chickens running around without their heads

This dish can never be out done
It's killing me
Ashes from Pompeii
The braces of teenage heart throbs

Bloody black and blues from abusive relationships
Fill the pots and pans
A homemade meal per say 
Chain linked sausage fences 

Add some Epsom salt
Some beef chuck
Giblets
And Simonides of Ceos

Daphoenus bones 
A dentist and a retainer
Cornets, pirouettes and percocets
Awkward magazine subscriptions

You can buy the cookbook in all its opacity 
See it in the Intrepid Museum 
There is work to be done on Mount Olympus
Therefore we should go see a movie at the drive in

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