Best Poohed Poems

Long long ago in a lonely lovely hill
When earth was young, handsome and green
Besides the meadow near the curly winding flow
There stood a tree proudly high and spry.

Swaying and dancing in wheezy pleasy breeze
Never was he still, always in a swing.
Not even a speck, not...

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Natures fields, plains, moors, deserts, wonders rife!
Habitats alive,
where life can survive!
Why? Civilised beings murdered all life!
For personal greed!
Used slaves to set seed!
Natures plan, the survival of the fittest.
Mans plan, to remove all not of interest.

What's changed? Nothing, I fear!

We poison oceans, deplete atmosphere!
Science always knew,
Governments...

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You don't listen to my sad words
Certainly can't understand the hurt inside of me
Nothing matters but what you feel and want
You hide in a world of emptiness
Repeated all day long in the news broadcasts that you devour 
Words that form your reality a far distance...

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OKAY? WHAT FIEND STOLE THY BODY ELECTRIC!?

thine distorted reflection rippled 
within rain maker's pool upon a midnight clear
full moonlight flooded shallow abyss, 
cleaved fractal structures of silence 
reverberating deathly hallow from 'ere
to infinity, whence magic wand 
whipped out from whereabouts unknown 

wove enchanting spell atop...

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There once was a lass named Bikini Rose
Curvy-swervy from her lips to her toes
   The lads ah-ed and oohed 
   Which Rose just pooh-poohed
Due to those hairs coming out of her nose...

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Thine distorted reflection rippled 
within rain maker's pool 
   upon a midnight clear
full moonlight sonata 
   flooded shallow abyss, 
cleaved fractal structures of silence 
reverberating deathly hallow from 'ere
to infinity, whence magic wand 
whipped out from 
   whereabouts unknown...

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Every pig likes eating slop;
Every cow chews cud.
Humans differ in their tastes,
But blame it on the bud.

Our tongues are packed with sensors
Which determine what we savor.
Though you’d choose chocolate ice cream,
I’d select a different flavor.

I love a cake or pie that’s made
With lemon or with...

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Oh chandelier
Forgive men like me
For your plea for trust;
We have dismissed
You promise of love
We have pooh-poohed
These scars on our faces are reminders
We are victims
These scars can attest;
No! We dare not forget
The pangs;
The dark side of you;
How you detached
And took a chunk out of our loyal...

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Some colleagues found him a tad frivolous
  While others thought him over-fastidious
The Dean advised him to start off assiduous
  Though I.T. pooh-poohed it all as ridiculous...

So the new instructor shifted and twisted
  himself into the oddest-looking pretzel-like
pedagogical configurations, hoping to please everyone
...

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I had a feeling this was an unusually hot September.
I said this to a few people.
They pooh-poohed my idea.

Most said they could remember lots of warm Septembers.
But this warm? I asked them.
ninety-one degrees on September 17th in Kansas?

Most of them do not live in Kansas,
but...

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Mrs. Claus kept warning Santa that this day might come.
But he pooh poohed it, and thought surely not, surely not.
Today he balked as he stared at the chimney, tight and glum.
Wishing he had spent last year eating more “what he ought”.

He had downed pumpkin pies,...

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She pooh-poohed his smallish gift.
He looked glum and she looked miffed.
	No diamond in sight,
	She did not delight.
Her love for him was set adrift....

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Do you ever wonder
How you would be viewed,
If you became extensively –
Extensively tattooed?

Would you be transformed
Into a real cool dude,
If you became extensively – 
Extensively tattooed?

Would your partner join you,
Or would the suggestion be pooh-poohed,
If you became extensively – 
Extensively tattooed?

Would you bare all,
But not...

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Some of the most unbearable changes in my life,
The ones I went into wearing a warrior’s shield and armor,
The changes I resisted so hard I ended up clawing and scratching
Kicking and screaming, shrieking, wailing, and keening
Were God’s way to get me to a much better...

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Her eyes filled up the way they do when she is predicting madness
We try not to take her words literally, for she is theatrically over-the-top
Armageddon, she told us, the armies are gathering now for end of times
Who to tell first? The father who abandoned her...

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