Best Oysters Poems
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Pin 4198: Disney Gallery - Alice in Wonderland Series (Baby Oyster)
Variations on The Walrus and the Carpenter" a narrative poem by Lewis Carroll that appeared in his book Through the Looking-Glass, published in December 1871.
OYSTERS
The tide was low the sun was high
The beach was long and very dry
The moon had argued it wanted to stay
But try as it might, could not get its way
The beach was dry and very long
Two figures came walking along
They wept as they went and quietly spoke
Of cockle shell boats rowed by gentle folk
With the sun high and tide so low
They could see where the oysters grow
The Walrus exclaimed I have a strong hunch
That we have found a delicacy for lunch
The beach was long and very dry
Dining under the open sky
The carpenter scraped butter on his bread
While saying those oysters looked over fed
The tide was low the sun was high
Hear me oysters he did descry
Come and join our party under the Sun
Where you will have lots of wonderful fun
The beach was dry and very long
The oysters came singing a song
La da dee we are happy as can be
We will party then go back to the sea
With the sun high and the tide so low
One oyster cried please do not go
But the other oysters were more sanguine
For the carpenter offered them some wine
The beach was long and very dry
There seemed to be nothing awry
The oysters sat and listened to tall tales
Of dragons and knights and ships in full sail
The tide was low the sun was high
Alas the oysters end was nigh
The Walrus said oysters do not decline
The carpenter and I shall start to dine
The beach was dry and very long
No more was sung the happy song
The walrus looked at the gentle sea swell
The carpenter held the last empty shell
Dedicated to my friends Mikki & The Queen of Ghali
Makers of the most wonderful magic
~Completed 22/04/2015~
Several sirens singing on the shore
Called Calypso’s crew for them to adore.
Willing witless wanderers;
Oblivious obeyers,
Which waves washed through a rocky tidal bore.
Svelte sisters sieved the sailor’s gore
That the salty surging sea cast ashore.
Boiling briny blunderers
With olive oil and oysters
And feasting until they could eat no more.
The tray comes out
I choose my first
I lift the shell to my mouth
Splash! A foamy spray of brine smashes against the rocks, sending arcs of water far onto the shore. I chew a few times, and swallow with the juice. The tide recedes back again.
I wait a moment
Sip my root beer
Eying the plate,
choosing another
I grab the shell
pause with my lips
To the edge of the
Ocean.
Whoosh! A sea bird dives into the surf, scanning for the glints of fish. As it glides beneath the surface, the twisting torrent of waves above pulls it back up. At the last moment it snatches up a stray perch. The salty lump slides down smooth.
Again, I wait.
Another sip.
Two is enough, I think.
Two, unadulterated
tastes of the sea
I cant say I like them
But im glad I tried
Maybe its an acquired taste
What I found inside one Oyster —
Was not a Pearl — of Sea —
But something soft — as Wonder —
That trembled — quietly —
It had no luster — save the Thought —
That Beauty might be small —
Enough to fit — within the shell —
That scarcely shone — at all —
The Tide went out — and left me —
Its secret — in my hand —
That Wealth — is not a Substance —
But what we understand —
I swallow the living grey flesh whole,
its salt-slick body
sliding down my throat like a small death
I chose to welcome.
The shell cracked open,
exposed—
raw.
So you are choosing Rocky Mountain Oysters over Meatballs
You love to eat them from a zip loc bag at the mall
You grew up in the deep south eating these odd things
For instance, you choose chicken feet with toe nails instead of chicken wings
You said you would eat the Rock Oysters with spaghetti or rice, it really doesn't
matter
Sometimes you eat them fried in a Tempura Batter
Do you ever feel remorse knowing some baby pigs are missing their Pa
All because you prefer Rocky Mountain Oysters over Meatballs
I can't condone your preference for what you would call a tasty treat
Something is wrong passing up boiled eggs for pickled pig's feet
The stuff you eat would have me being a frequent flyer to a bathroom stall
I can't get past you showing favorites to Rocky Mountain Oysters Over Meatballs
Did anyone tell you what they really are
It's not something you eat with a date gazing at the stars
My mind has always been open to try different things
But I need to draw the line eating a male animal's bling bling
I've eaten camel, horse, octopus even legs of frogs
Down in Tijuana, I ate tacos made from dog
You say what's wrong with this, I share these with my in laws
Another advantage is Rocky Mountain Oysters cost less than your run of the mill
Meatballs
Have you tried them with a little bit of Texas Pete
Rumor has it they started with sheep on the island of Crete
I do however like a good seasoned batch of Collard Greens
Can't quite completely criticize the South, I am caught in between
But I do get a kick out of the deep Southern Drawl
But I am still a Yankee when declining Rocky Mountain Oysters over Meatballs
Cookie, fire-up yer chuck wagon 'cause th' round-up is begun!
Us cowpokes is gonna cull th' herd frum dawn to th' settin' sun!
We is gonna supply you wid th' cookin's fer our chuck tonight;
Heaps uv good ol' Rocky Mountain oysters broiled fer our delight!
It'll be a hot an' dusty trail as we drive 'em frum th' chaparral,
An' herd them cantankerous kine fer brandin' in th' ol' corral!
It'll take a heap uv sweat an' a lot uv cussin' to git 'em movin', alright,
But it'll be worth it, 'cause we is feedin' on Rocky Mountain oysters tonight!
Usin' our cuttin' hosses we'll rope an' wrestle th' bulls to th' ground.
There we'll brand an' neuter 'em as they beller an' kick around!
We'll be bruised an' kicked fer little pay but that'll be alright,
'Cause we is gonna enjoy a feast uv Rocky Mountain oysters tonight!
Us cowboys works hard wid little pay rollin' 'round in th' manure,
Convertin' bulls into steers; that's more'n them city fellers could endure!
But that's okay, 'cause at round-up time we gits a special treat;
Tonight we is gonna enjoy a feast uv Rocky Mountain oysters to eat!
Memories of stolen weekdays by the water..
Oysters on the half shell and made to order..
Your hair in the sun made my heart warm and race..
My desire I couldn't hold as I slowly kiss your face..
So many all around us, but our hearts drawn close..
Conversations I can't recall because my eyes follow your lips..
As we walk to the car my arms lightly hold your hips..
For one last look as the sun beams over your shoulders..
I kiss your neck to the back of your ear and slowly whisper
as I pull you close and so near..
These moments we did not steal, much too precious for a love
we forever feel...
oysters I don't eat
I do not like their taste but
pearls are such a treat
Open orifice.
Yield yourself.
Sensually salty.
Tasty treat.
Erogenous events.
Rapidly realising
Sexual satisfaction.
breaded, deep-fried
freshly severed nuts
Is anyone hungry?
Mountain oysters so tasty until
You get knowledge from mean cousin Bill.
But before I found out
Gave them enormous shout
I hate to admit I ate my fill!
You can eat them either raw or fried
Great flavor is something not denied.
Inside a shell is where they hide.
You have to swim deep in the sea.
In long beds is where they will be.
There the black shells rest on the sand.
It is quite a job harvesting them by hand.
Sometimes a pearl is what you will see.
A number of those pearls can make you money.
A walrus and a carpenter were sitting on a beach.
They had eaten a bunch of oysters within their reach.
After eating, the walrus expressed a bit of remorse.
They ate so many; they had no room for the main course.
The walrus said, “I have found a recipe in a cook book.
Carpenter, this looks tasty. Will you please have a look?
It was invented in New Orleans by Chef Antoine.
Unfortunately, the original recipe is unknown and gone.
However, many reasonable facsimiles exist.
We already have most of the ingredients on the list.
This way, we can use the leftover butter and bread.
There is no absinthe, but we can use Pernod instead.
We can meet here tomorrow when we are ready for lunch.
We can draw more of those stupid oysters by the bunch.”
There is a stall down by the dock
Selling the freshest seafood stock.
Creatures in shells, caught just offshore.
Live oysters there for eating raw.
Each one sealed up and watertight.
To prise open it is a fight.
Down in one, living flesh slither.
Sudden burst of ocean flavour.
Only these ones you eat alive
If you expect to stay alive.
Oysters help keep men in the pink
As they contain a lot of zinc.
Tis healthy food without a doubt.
Best washed down with some Irish stout.
Now Casanova knew the score,
As he ate live oysters galore.
He knew how to play a good game
Eating fresh oysters without shame.
There is a stall down by the dock
Selling the freshest seafood stock.