Best Lame Poems

Dear 2024,

I hope this poetic vow 
wouldn’t be shunned,
as I block negativity 
from my phone, 
like my bitter exes.

And forgive my sense
of humor that 
resembles sour grapes, 
like a dash of salt 
and pepper sprinkled 
on top of old drapes. 
Perhaps, as this 
year bids...

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Woodrow's wife is the apple of his eye
But there's been no sex lately and here's why
She told him that he's lame
Every night it's the same
There are other options she wants to try...

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Trump orders everyone to church
Or Governors will get the birch
Americans will pay
On Memorial Day
With God to blame, Trump ends his search...

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LAME GOODBYE 

‘Twas the night before Christmas,
like all the years that went before
the whole city seemed to throng en masse
in the sparkling Park street drawn by its lure. 

In the translucent sky of the congealed night
the stars had all faded away in the glow galore
of...

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Patrick Ewing is Neanderthal, but his wife is pretty yawl.
Neil Cannon face is comical, but Mariah Carey loved him so.
Michael Jordan is crooked teeth and Juanita is petite.
Donald Trump is running for President and so funny in what he represents.
Jeb Bush is so political savvy...

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Now pouts the ex-president Trumpty
his turkey-day gravy’s all lumpy
he’s down on his luck
for he’s a lame duck
his a** voters threw in the dumpty


Susan Ashley
November 26, 2020


~ Second Place ~
Contest: Out On A Lim
Sponsor: Joseph May...

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There once was a dancer who danced himself lame
For a sculpture, he thought was a dame
He turned up his smile 
And spoke without guile 
Tickled the rhythm and thought it was fame...

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Silly Billy had no fear, he drowned it in a case of beer.
Handy Andie so adept, kept so busy, she never slept.
Dirty Donna did what you wanna, she lived just down the street.
You didn't have to ask her twice, she was so nice and very...

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LAME BUTTERFLY
I look through the dark where the rockets are soaring,
and go through another bleak Fourth of July,
remembering summer and when it was raining.
Forgetting you is a lame butterfly.

I do not feel cold, nor a warm wind, if blowing, 
I've emptied my mind of our...

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Limerick: Once a Mom Tigress spurned her lame-born cub

			for Commandant Cousteau’s son

Once a Mom Tigress spurned her lame-born cub 
Wild Life Champ admitted cub to his club
Took cub under his wing
Till she could wildly spring:
Club members now learn to swing the knobbed club.

© T. Wignesan...

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Limerick: An Invasion by the Maimed, Tamed and the Lame

An invasion by the Maimed, Tamed and the Lame
Is still an invasion by any other name
     “She stoops to conquer!”
      Hearths freeze in fire
Better life for theirs...

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Look forward, storm.
Great of location, desolate.
Look toward, shelter....

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It's befitting to call Trump a 'Lame Duck'
Cares only about himself; what a schmuck!
He won't admit defeat
"I WON," he types in tweet
Shame on him. He ran our country amok!


November 21, 2020 ~ Out on a Lim Contest
Sponsored by: Joseph May...

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Revoke This Lame Ban Of Soup's Dearest Friend

In speaking her heart , tis not a great sin
revoke this lame ban of Soup's dearest friend.
Who else inspires and welcomes more than she
she that gave great inspiration to me.

Ice water may be cold but she is hot,
she's...

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.
&
as for
cyclists
...............
how are we
meant to understand
all your fancy hand signals
................................
plus, we can see 
your b*lls
....

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