Best Kidney Stone Poems

...I’ve got a kidney stone
Trying not to moan
It hurts me deep
Trying not to weep
Sweep away the pain
Down the bathtub drain......

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...Grinding stone,

Mortar stone,

Remaining of Stone Age,

Gallstone,

Kidney stone,

Paining of IT age!......

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...How can something so small
Cause so much pain?
With awesome power
And nothing to gain

You think you are dying
You hope that you are
Your threshold of pain 
Has been tested so far

Those wh......

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...The bastards who dole out abuse
Like seeing my neck in a noose
But they've only sewn
A razor-edged kidney stone
Which for them has pain to induce


Author's note:  Abuse can be enforced povert......

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...they shake, rattle and roll,
calcium balls not for my soul,
every time they move,
it's not my groove,
I warn them to stop
and quit doing the hop, 
the doc threatens to laser,
a form of using a......

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...THE MOTHER OF ALL LOVE POEMS
How much love, comes from the heart of me?
Let's count the ways, far as my heart can see,
no more than's in my gizzard or my liver,
I'll ever find any love to give he......

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...Golden Conversation


Jack:

Let this kidney stone
Be instantly gone
Pain from the back
You can’t well track.


Joseph:

Yeah. I feel two addled ostrich eggs
Lumped on both sides of my ......

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...There was a young bloke from Sydney
Found a large stone in his kidney
Went into a Doc
Who took out the rock
Surely felt better then did-n-ee......

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...Mud Puddle 

Has life handed you a kidney stone, Old Timer?
Does the world treat you like a dead gnat in it's oatmeal?
Some days, do you feel like a mud puddle in an ocean?
Do you sense t......

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...Got a nasty rash ? 
To the laptop dash
Turn it on and see 
What that nasty rash could be ! 

Oh Google it, google it,
When your tummy hurts a bit 
When you’re feeling lousy
Have a little “bro......

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...What means Spermatorrhoea??
Excessive emission of semen without org-sm or er-ction.
Semen is a whitish fluid that contains sperm.
Spermatorrhea is a disorder in males where an individual 
experie......

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...Lighter yellow pee = is good 4 the kidney :-)

So drink plenty of water, especially if it's hotter!

Cuz kidney stone pain's not what I consider gain!

Eat low-oxalate / sodium, & more fresh fo......

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...i printed off
all of my poems

i distributed them
at the traffic lights 

no one opened their car windows
except one poem i stuffed in a dog's face

a child laughed at me from his back seat
......

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...Bake the world a cake and wear your shimmering crown of perfection.
Gorge on pure bites of unearned kindness to feed your grievous bodily farm.
Your dignity is a sight unseen.

Like a spider in m......

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...If love were 'dark matter'
it would be the size
of a small kidney stone.

Hate is
an intestinal tapeworm
that gnaws at our vitals,
though most folks
remain unsure just what 'vitals' are.

T......

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