Best Grog Poems

...Oh cripes I’ve gotta tell yer of a horror ride I had,
	That beat any bronc or bull I’ve rode, and I must say I’m glad,
	I’ll never have to ride like that, again to hold me seat.
	Now rodeo is ‘kid......

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...Sossled
I wandered as lonely as a dog,
Me pantaloons were full of frogs
Slurping suds while on the grog,
Dog paddling with the ducks,

I thought I knew her lovely face,
Got cuddling with Aunt......

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...Inexpert at rhyme 
or singing in time
I bray like a laryngitic donkey
my artwork's inept 
I'm ham-fisted except
when doodling things that are wonky

Of style I'm bereft 
my feet are both left
splayed......

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...There's a Senior's home called the Shady Lane
    and life's curse is at an end.
Where a hundred souls are kept in line
    till Death its message sends.
They built a country... fought its wars, ......

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...Here we are in 1650, which is ten minutes to five
swing the wheel to the West, which is left,
put your sun cream away, man the mizzen and the stays
as we set off for some murder and some theft.

......

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...Carolers sing in front of a garland draped door
In scarf and boot turn, spill grog into snow pour.

Approaching our porch with, “Come ye faithful”
Open the door and come, let’s adore the ......

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...Candy floss, seaside rock, smoothies, and flags sporting
Union Jacks
Replace the old traditions of striped deckchairs 
And Kiss-Me-Quick hats.
Chipwicks for our salt and vinegar fries
And their ......

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...Bugger 
17th July 2015

Last night my missus gave me some oysters for tea
Was I in for a night of rip snorting whoopee?
I showered and shaved trying to smell like a stud
Her half dozen oysters ......

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...Write a limerick of your own about a Muppet. 
If you post it in a comment or in soup mail to me, 
and I find it appropriate, I'll add it on. ;-)


Sesame Street's Count von Count is dress......

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...JOE WHITE

Back in 1880 you will find, Joe White he was about.
The Brumby runner master mind. Of this I'll leave no doubt.
He took from Mugan station, 600 Brumbies yes my friend.
Had the best ri......

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...I starts me life as pirate, 
A grommet before age twelve,
Not an ordinary bandit,
High sea adventures me delve.

With a Letter of Marque in me han’
And the Commodore for me pa!
I spends dogwat......

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...I don’t think I shall quite forget the name Camilla Martin.
She’s the teacher of me grandson at the local kindergarten.
No question she’s a lovely lady; dedicated through and through,
but the less......

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...‘She’s on again - the annual campin’ trip regatta,
and we’ve got ourselves together for our plans to Wonnangatta. 
The high country; you can’t beat it for the peace and quiet
unless of course some......

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...The puppet pranced
The strings frayed
A jackass brayed
As poppin’ hoppys
Sat and rose
In ballet dance
Of well browned nose
Applause and “clapture”
of Stockholm rapture
A mocking strut
Of fa......

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...I blame me brother for the likes of this predicament,
when we pub crawled up to Bunyip, and where our night was spent.
Thank God I wasn’t in the driver’s seat, ‘cause we wouldn’t be alive, 
but me......

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