Best Carne Poems
I could not see anything wrong
With getting a tan in a thong
But it made Jan ruffle
when it failed to muffle
Spicy chili con carne pong
Who am I, where am I from
I’m a girl who ancestors are from Mexico, Puerto Rico, and Panama
See me I don’t know the whole enchilada
My zodiac sign has to do with Aqua
I walk up to you and say, “ Hola amigo, como esta”
You reply to me and say,” Muy bien y tu.”
I say, “Bien mucho gracias.”
I can’t really have a conversation in Espanol
Because I only know boquito
Como te llamas, do you know mine
Me llamas est Preciosa
Me gusta el color Amarillo
You can walk up to me and bring out the mexican in me
Bring out the rice and beans
The whole encilada
Bring out the de le manana
I’ll get back to ya
If I saw you in Puerto Rico I would say
Bueno? Que traes or oye tocayo
I will introduce you to my traditional food
Burritos
Enchiladas
Bolillos
Carne abada
You bring out the Mexican in me
Fresh peppers, onions sauteed
Lean, lean ground beef browned
Tempting aroma surrounds
Chopped fresh herbs sizzle
Juicy tomatoes
Pintos, too
Zing!
Inspired by: Andrea Dietrich and Lunch
Contest:MAKE ME DROOL WITH EPULAERYU
Written: November 05, 2014
Form: Epulaeryu
Golda and Goofus.
or how a young Baer lost his luncheon and found that man need not live by bread alone.
Deep, deep in a pine-wood in the Adirondacks,
the Baers owned a cabin. [Offset against tax.]
Daddy Baer, it was said, was a Wall Street tycoon.
Red-Hot Momma Baer never rose before noon.
Their son, 'Goofus' Baer, was a no-good lazy bum;
always scratching his groin and chewing pink gum.
On a fine summer's day, the Baers went for a stroll,
left the lunch table set. [which you may think is droll]
Meantime, up wandered Golda, a pubescent blonde lass,
in a bright gingham dirndl and brim-full of sass.
Lost her way in the woods; she was hungry, footsore,
so without hesitation, she knocked on the door.
No answer, walked in, saw comestible display:
Daddy's cold chili 'carne, she passed sans delay.
Momma's limp spinach salad met with sheer disdain,
But Goofus's jelly doughnuts! She couldn’t refrain.
Washing down the repast with the Baer’s best root beer,
she felt so damn' tired - almost fell on her rear.
Climbing the stairs for much-needed repose,
she passed Daddy Baer’s chamber just wrinkling her nose.
Momma's chintzy boudoir was too outre to suit,
but Goofus's macho haven was darling and cute!
[Papered with Harley posters and pneumatic nudes.]
Golda dropped off to sleep - dreamt of muscle-bound pseuds.
Hungry from exertions, the Baers slavered for food:
adults - minor tampering – Goofus’s wakening was rude.
“My favouritest din-din’s been gobbled!" was his whine.
"They only nibbled yours, left the mere smell of mine!
I'm going to bed: don’t expect to see me soon.
There’s goodies stashed there: I'll work-out all afternoon."
Captin revisionist Cat
Even before the arrival of the first snows, so brilliantly candid,
we climbed mounts less dangerous than the Alps's;
and we proudly chalked it up to our experience.
Now the snowy cliffs with bouffant boulders,
have lost their captious and so beatific image,
and quite too often we got pinched by burdock,
distracted by the robins chattering on a coarse descent;
I champed on crisp strawberries, while he challenged his strength.
My buddy never castigated me for my bizarre behavior,
and I admired him for displaying humor without repulsion,
or retort, and with chisel and hammer we engraved faces of historic men
on the smoothest rocks which were replete with their handsomeness.
Those adventurous afternoons are repealed when we look up,
and recreate them through our Male Chauvinism, cheery not dumb;
we felt like cave men making rudimentary drawings of their hunted animals,
while their women picked wild chicory for an early dinner.
Chums we were, resembling cowboys with wide hats in a chiaroscuro,
drinking in a bar filled with fashionable ladies frolicking and saying hello;
and chili con carne we ate, and plenty of beers to wash it down.
After our money was all squandered, our pockets were empty and we felt alone,
dazed...wobbling with fear, afraid to face our witless wives at home;
we were two idiots wooing empathy and some undeserving love.
And didn't they seem two witches ready for vengeance in their frown,
trying to squeeze the truth out of our silent and pretentious mouths too fulsome?
Frost will bring winter soon, and the snowy cliffs with bouffant boulders will be covered,
our hair have turned almost white to match the bright color of the deep snows,
as this river is freezing up, to become a sheet of ice, where no boats or barges pass;
and we play chess, the intramural game of a confined life, without those clandestine affairs.
Our darlings approve with sweet intonation, intensifying their affection so amorous;
and we embrace them with that tenderness that they have long desired...
staring at the snowy cliffs with bouffant boulders that these two climbers made their own,
remembering the cold and the shivering...coming down to a valley of comfort and domain.
Copyright 2009 by Andrew Crisci
Usually a pound of ground
with black beans abound
pintos are good for your heart
cannellini start
pepper, tomatoes
green chiles
mix!
Jalapeno, seeded, minced
chop one onion rinced
six cloves of garlic thrown in
use olive oil then
chili powder blend
spice a lot
HOT!
Following the food truck trend,
Peruvian fare:
Beef, chorizo, hot dog, eggs
crushing the limp bun—
one “superburger,”
carne clogged.
Split.
Take your knife
Carne con sangre
On sale here
Cut me up
Slice me dice me
Taste my sour blood
Savor the flavor
Revenge is on sale
Bitter and sweet all for you
Bile flows through me
Thinking of your hate
You may have butchered me
Slaughtered to rot at high time noon
I have a revelation for you
I love gardens and flowers
I now am one with them
As I feed them, and bring beauty
To those who quench the thirst of love
I kiss the sun and laugh at you
hahahahahaha
You gave us that, Grand Warrior
You conquered my anger and my bitterness
You conquered my vengeance, Madiba
You showed the World the way, Madiba
And forged a great nation, the Rainbow Nation
I was there with the happy multitudes
Yet now I must accept the dictates of life
The dictates of humanity, of who we are
You leave us a strong Nation, South Africa
Where we had lived like unwelcome strangers
We are now the proud owners and shapers
Of our collective destiny and inheritance
I know and we all know that your life
Great Son of Hendry and Nosekeni
Descendant of King Ngubengcuka
I say we now know without a doubt
That your life had a great purpose
And your departure a great legacy
How does one mourn a hero of your stature?
How does one mourn a great statesman?
How does one mourn a Grand Warrior?
Except to say you were posted to Azania
That we may see the light and be free
And are now en route to another front?
Go well, my brother, Great Son of Africa
We shall never forget, brother mine,
Carne da mesma carne, sim,
Your call for peaceful coexistence
For we know, my brother, yes, we know
We are in the same South Africa boat.
I want you to know, Madiba, my Brother,
As you embark on your final journey
That millions are distraught to see you go
And that of all those, I am the most distraught.
May your legacy endure throughout the ages!
Goodbye, symbol of our freedom, adeus.
Smith’s Octopuses Party On Pontoons
Rumor Has It My Dear
Rumor has it my dear something spectacular is near
Bring your batik hats to our grand lavish scene
Wear flowing Kebeya robes
Let them flow in the air
We’re having our party upon the ocean
On pontoons made of bamboo notions
Flown in from Indonesia with crews
Planks will connect all the segments
Chris Christie will help with construction
Bridging rafts with bamboo shoots & roots
(We understand he understands bridges)
Yachts will punctuate the festivities
Covered in purple red flowers with care
Tied to the floating swaying affair
McCartney and Sting will be there
Octopuses Garden is the theme
And Paul will bring Ringo to sing
The Clinton's and Bushes are on the list
Paparazzi will see if they kiss or do tricks
And who can resist our guests of honor
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt
The main menu is set like this;
Foie gras loco moco carne
Matusaka beef
Pheasant/Mallard breast roast
Beluga Sevruga, Osetra caviar
Goût de Diamants, Taste of Diamonds champagne
Haute chocolate ice cream
This all seems like a dream
We pray that the weather holds up
The only waves we wish to see is from us
In the form of greetings and pleasantries
The party has been planned for ages
If storms should gather
It won’t really matter
We’re thankful
The Royals, Mr.& Mrs. Smith are here
To weigh down pontoons and rafts
With billions in sacks of gold trinkets
Door prizes for sure, (sorry no doors), for those who attend
500 guests will arrive at the gala
A date with Mick Jagger and two jaguars
Assured for each person as gifts guaranteed
Compliments of King & Queen Smith
Whose parties should never be missed
A mystery guest, no surprise
A legend in his own mind
Mr. Trump and his hair might arrive
Since the pope is preoccupied
We’ll sway to the music with fine company
All are welcome to our heavenly scene
At the octopuses party on the sea
7/11/14 Rumor Has It contest
A
minha vida
e uma desgraça
bem fixa
nu
crucifixo
crucificado
pelos prazeres da vida
prazeres da carne
oh, vida!
Que destruí os sonhos que eu sempre sonhei
desafio-te a morte,
já mais serás capaz de morrer
e
desaparecer
tal
como
sol
vida cruel
mostra-me do que escapas
mostra-me
o
quanto
vales.
Al completar trece, decidi lo mejor seria no crecer. No sere el primero en morir
como martir pues la pobreza tal vez me convenza que el aire ya no es gratis.
Mi casa no esta hecha de una caja fuerte ni tampoco se encuentra debajo de un
puente.
De pelo *****, tez café, feo, estatura baja, no enano, sin almohada.
¿Mi valia? 30 piezas de plata.
¿A quien sere vendido despues?
A veces frustrado en confusion sin salida con remedio al silencio.
Me pelizco el pellejo porque no quiero estar aqui en carne y hueso.
De payaso, con risa por fuera y susurros de lamento por dentro.
La recuerdo solo en imagen. Atento al sonido de su nombre. Al olor de su
perfume.
La busco y no la encuentro.
Esperando oir una buena excusa, mi fotografia se encuentra detras del carton
de leche.
¿Que te parece? ¿A quien sere vendido despues?
I Love You
I love you as much as a digging dog loves finding its long buried T-bone.
I love you as much as I love carne asada tacos and beans on Saturday nights.
I love you as much as the blue sky loves a flowing white cumulus cloud.
I love you as much as a revving car engine loves its regular oil changes.
I love you as much as a marching ant loves my open gaping cookie jar.
I love you as much as a dead rotting corpse loves a green gated graveyard.
I love you as much as a crooked preacher loves collecting baskets full of money.
I love you as much as a common thief loves an unlocked door at midnight.
I love you as much as a cluss-filled toilet loves finally flushing it all down at dawn.
I love you as much as a mosquito loves the open bare skin on the back of my leg.
I love you as much as my stomach loves the flow of warm mashed potatoes in winter.
I love you as much as an open book loves human eyes peering upon its naked white pages.
I love you as much as a bed loves the springs in its mattress when the bouncing begins.
It’s been a day, brother, it’s been a day.
I’m ridiculous for lack of content,
All my plot holes are on display.
Am I doing OK? Am I having a day?
I can’t get a call back. I sat on a thumb tack.
It woke up my skinny white ass.
I’m mad in the morning. I’m angry afternoons.
I’m ornery as hell. I’m bloody pissed, as well,
And sick of the puddler’s stupid drama:
“We’re down by the bow and headed for the bottom.
There’s gonna be a ruckus, boys, so smoke ‘em if you got ‘em.”
Good lord, it’s just clinker and slag.
All the king’s horses are slovenly nags.
Nothing but losers and misfits
Posing as rakes and roues.
Like red beans in chili con carne
Causing gas bending over the blarney.
I re-organize the hectic and recognize the stone.
And yet, because my truss work was contrived
Of wrought iron, rather than steel,
It resisted corrosion while exposed to the storm.
Though I’ve been ghosted and gas-lit,
Led around like a halfwit,
I still miss Jenny Wren’s chrysanthemum smile,
And I'll always have a thing for Amber Rose.
So, I’m mailing my love to Azerbaijan.
Baka, Baku, it isn’t Shikoku,
But it sometimes makes me smile.
And I thank my clerestory windows,
They let in the light and vent out the heat,
Affording me the grace to do my job.
Por favor dime que esta pasando
tus pensamientos no puedo desifrarlos
si realmente no crees poder algun dia llegar amarme
dimelo por favor y dejame largarme
no gastes ya mas mi tiempo te lo pido de corazon
tu sabes que te amo y estoy dispuesto a darte mi amor
pero si tu no crees sentir lo mismo por mi
dimelo de frente a dejame ahora de tu lado partir
y no es que quiera ahora precionarte
pero si no crees llegar amarme dejame marcharme
mi corazon no esta hecho de acero sino de carne
y no creo que podra resistir otra decepcion tan grande
por favor ya no me quieras y comienza aprender amarme
y si no puedes tampoco voy a quejarme
empaco mis sentimientos y todos esos lindos recuerdos
me bajo de mi nuve y te saco de mi vida por completo
por favor no dejes mas tiempo ahora pasar
heme aqui te espero por si algun dia me llegas amar
pero si ahora no es el tiempo pues tienes otro amor
entonces dimelo y me marcho con todo mi dolor...