I watched my bedroom fold into dimmer light,
The mirror learned to flinch away from sight,
My name slipped off the wall like fading chalk,
Home turned its face and forgot how to talk.
The hallway hummed a hollow, distant tone,
Like every echo learned to leave me alone,
My heartbeat frayed into the brittle air,
As every inner voice dissolved in a scare.
My hands forgot the weight of being home,
I felt myself recede, begin to roam,
A stranger leaned inside my borrowed skin,
And quietly erased the girl within.
It was shocking to lose my family in one day, to have no funeral, no one who cared.
I lost my whole family in one day, the judge may have caused me to suffer the loss of my family.
The judge ordered me to list someone to be a witness to my divorce length, this caused my family to get mad, leaving me to lose my whole family in one day.
Some days I feel like it was just a dream, then I remember, this was real, and it continues to this day.
Abuse can come in many forms, even after divorce, the ex-spouse can continue abusing by way of parental alienation, lies, lack of empathy, and many more not mentioned.
You never know what tomorrow will bring, so remember the loss I suffered in just one day.
Lifting prayers to God, today and always.
We were running on a field, the ground full of green, yet it didn’t feel beautiful.
Feeling like I am away from my mind, running on baises.
I started running. I heard someone screaming my name—
and I ran. Everyone around me started running too. There were no adults, just a bunch of kids running across the field.
My feet grew colder, breath was feeling like committing sin because I had to stop everytime.
The voices grew angrier, because some kids were ahead.
But how could I explain to those voices—
some kids were on trains,
some had good shoes,
some looked happy.
I wasn’t one of them.
I stopped. I tried to explain to those voices that I wasn’t supposed to be there.
They didn’t listen.
They kept running in the same race,
believing this was the only way.
But how I could explain to them, I lost the track I was the winner of.
Grey metal, lost lustre
Sharp angles with blunt meaning
Tinkle, clunk, staccato mumble
Buried invitation, sent
At random. I pick up
Some straight hard piece
It hides a secret
But what is hiding if not
Showing secretly?
Staring, gaping
Gives no explanation
If you look into the toolbox
The toolbox looks into you.
I am random
Or will do my best to be so.
Symmetry is dead.
And I being undead
Turn from the toolbox
With sinking heart
Imagining the recesses
Filled with life
I love you both with all my heart,
But Mum, you tore that love apart.
You made me choose, you made me cry,
While Dad was left to wonder why.
You spoke of him with poisoned tongue,
Bad words for ears still far too young.
You painted him in shades of wrong,
And made me feel I don’t belong.
He wasn’t perfect, neither are you,
But love should never be cut in two.
You didn’t let me have my say,
You slowly pushed him far away.
I grieved a man who didn’t die,
He lived, he waited, I wondered why.
You shut him out without a trace,
And left a space I couldn’t replace.
I missed his voice, his laugh, his face,
I missed the way he held me safe.
And though he lived, it felt the same
As if he’d gone and I was to blame.
Let children love, don’t make them choose,
It’s not a game, it’s hearts you lose.
By David S Bailey
29th May 2025
Pacing in an empty room,
I'm sick, and tired of fighting
This unyielding evil
Who makes his case
To torment our family
And as the minutes turn to hours,
I feel the force of cruel waves
Crashing against the guiltless shore,
As he tries to drown
The truth in lies
And so I say a silent prayer,
Hoping against hope
For an end
To an endless storm
I pray that when the tide retreats,
His heinous lies dissolve in foam;
That blinding rays of sun expel
This ghost who haunts our happy home
I pray his clever masquerade,
Well crafted by undying hate,
Will fall away like rotted wood
Within the healing light of truth
I pray, when everything is seen,
And all is known and understood,
That Justice wash away this scourge
Forever from our lives.
a robin chirping near the window
serves up a delicious bit of melancholy
on the living room floor an air mattress
quietly cajoles my sciatic nerve
this place, this home, this abode the result
of a thirty year 'bout with the devil
an old card table with battered folding chair
the most unlikely place for a throne
a hot cup of Joe laced with Bailey’s Irish Crème
scrambled muse on the side for breakfast
The catcher in the rye
I go and drop the ball
I lay it down and cry
I’m sleeping in the stall
Cause everyone is phony
Your company is lonely
Your animals are bony
Your everything is only
I’m underneath the bridge
Below the overpass
I’m locked inside the fridge
I’m sleeping in the grass
Cause everyone is faking
Every excuse for bailing
Your painted skin is flaking
Success story is failing
You’re spinning all around
Mascara masquerade
You’re walking without sound
A conga line charade
You’re hands and feet are bound
You’re tied into the ground
And nailed into the wall
I’ve lost sight of the ball
I’ve lost sight of the band
And buried in the sand
They’re telling me it’s fine
They’re calling me insane
They think I’ve lost my mind
They’re calling me Cobain
They’re telling me to smile
They tell me not to cry
And maybe stay a while
The catcher in the rye
Efficiency, anxiety
Result, vanity
Success, burnout
Alienation, disguise
Unconscious, relapse
Control, coact
Apologist: own merit!
Arbitrary, reclusive
Circus, bread
Conscious, blurred
Acceptance.
Commotion, trivialization
Affection, weakness
Love, liquid
Affliction, medication
People can no longer
Human beings.
- Bruna Beatrice.
I can’t fit inside this lock
I can’t fit inside this sock
This hole is not meant for me
Body stretching out from me
Out of sync
Misshapen link
Wash the ink out in the sink
You went day and I went night
I went left and you went right
And everything just looks so wrong
I don’t understand this song
I am way beyond repair
My liver’s pulling at my hair
My neck is biting at my tongue
My leg is choking out my lung
My hands are fighting with my heart
My pieces mixing with my parts
I’m a jumble mumbled mess
An uneducated guess
I went no and you went yes
You went more and I went less
All tied up and all stretched out
I got lupus I got gout
I don’t fit into this mold
I’m too hot and I’m too cold
I’m lopsided and askew
You went red and I went blue
I went one and you went two
And I don’t know what I should do
Fool me once and fool me thrice
But now I’m chewing on the dice
Rattle brains and saddle lice
Grip my shoulder in a vice
Two thirds left and halfway done
Three makes ten and nine makes one
Now you’ve got me all confused
Now I can’t fit in these shoes
I think that I went too long
I think that I went too long
A silent storm rages...it rages in his heart,
He watches his child being pulled apart.
As she whispers poison again in the ear,
His child drifts away, with doubt and fear.
Tears of anguish, a silent cry...
...he feels however hard he may try,
The judge there might turn a deaf ear to him,
Though his sadness fill his heart to the brim.
Twisted in the court his love so pure,
Can he win ever, he is not sure...
...but he knows it will not be in vain,
Tomorrow's victory will dwarf today's pain.
Rising from his heart, a voice so clear,
Tells him, "Hey, victory will be here!"
Your open arms will close in a warm embrace,
Your kid will be yours, do not just stress.
The night may be long, but the day will come.
The truth will rise, your heart won't be lonesome.
Your love, now lost, will find its way,
Wait for your child, wait for that day...
An old world united.
Attributes not known from the peace we campaigned.
Enforced into an unknown war we currently endeavour.
Utmost bower bird tactics, the uninvited dominantly proceed
From above, streams vibrations throughout every sense of our actualities.
Days follow nights accompanying collective conceptualisations.
Wanting correlative wants with downhearted, optimistic, realism.
Will I again feel wind or sunshine rays on my face?
What extant future awaits if triumphant?
Questions of an unrevealed fate retain minds insecurely occupied.
This dark establishment suffocates this uncertain future.
Artificial lights guide our way, breathing air amassed in dirt.
Youthful generations accept their existence as studious to no other.
Below the surface, we crusade to combat & reclaim.
Patience furthermore perseverance.
Determined, we manoeuvre to arise.
A NEW world united.
Thrice about the cauldron go
and answer me, if it be known.
Untie the words and give them form,
dissect the ingredients of murder’s charm.
A new tradition has traction gained,
a tradition of alienated masculine pain.
Where insults demand their due in blood
in schools, in stores, and quiet neighborhoods.
the hole in the street
is a gaping wound
it’s been here
for two months
now
the walls in the house
groan and ache
as the front yard
hides in shadows
the night is an ocean
set in front of me
while sitting at my laptop
i hear a pattering sound
i open the door
and look outside
to see there’s no rain
but restless crickets sing
a street light flickers
dead stars
the tractor factory
down the hill
has been closed
almost forty years
a casino opened
to pick up the slack
but nothing’s the same
i can feel this town
is dying every day
yesterday
i washed dishes
at a diner
three hours for free
a trial run
and didn’t get it
as a second job
the manager says
there are many others
on trial
a light bleeds
through a crack
under a door
in the other room
the roommate
who wants me to move
stirs
Let's have a conversation
morning greeting once
a favor hug
Without
As a neighbour
We Live
for over 10 Years
no fault of each other.
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