there's something intrinsically poetic about lists…
1.
bread (wholemeal)
twelve eggs
solar panels
occasional frogs
corporate lawyers
steam
2.
onions (red)
tomatoes (finely chopped)
garlic (four cloves)
fireman's ladder (aluminium)
disparity (secretly hidden)
mildness (abundant)
gluttony (almost definite)
mozzarella (abridged)
3.
clean sink
dirty sink
point un-necessarily
wear wetsuit and carry surfboard in populated area
shirk responsibilities
vacuum dog
hide
reappear (nearly palindromic)
borrow an eagle
book car in to be painted yellow
buy a bucket
start new list
Categories:
wholemeal, fun, funny, humorous, life,
Form: List
'Six slices a day is the well balanced way'
the boffins back then told us all,
but now I'm not impressed, they say 'wholemeal is best,
and more healthy' their clarion call.
For a good spirit lifter, an evening snifter
was, we were told, good for the heart,
now they say fourteen units (down from twenty-one)
in a week keeps you safe, if you're smart.
'Drinka pinta milka day' the adverts said,
it's good for the teeth and the bones,
now 'half fat, low dairy' the choices are scary
I may well just leave them alone.
Our family had chips cooked in gallons of lard,
spread dripping and salt on our toast,
bacon ate with the rind, and no scraps left behind
gravy made with the juice from the roast.
We ate this sinful food with no qualms or remorse
and left the table feeling full,
those boffins may be right but I think, with hindsight
that their lives must be terribly dull.
Categories:
wholemeal, food,
Form: Rhyme
It's such a pleasurable thing
having a sandwich to your taste
one that make your tastebuds tingle
you want to enjoy it not to haste
Firstly take nice wholemeal bread
spread on some nice creamy butter
this gives it such smooth texture
not like others that seem to stutter
Put on a fresh iceberg lettuce
covering it with some coleslaw
give it couple slices of cheese
then sliced onions nicely raw
Now to finish it off a real treat
take a few slim slices of ham
honey cured such a sweet taste
giving your tongue healing balm
Just add a little shake of pepper
now you're ready! looks a sight
can't just sit and look there at it
go on! have a munching good bite
Categories:
wholemeal, food, life,
Form: Rhyme
For your lunchbox or party, to keep hale and hearty
when it came to consumption of bread,
'six slices a day is the well balanced way'
was what the TV adverts had said.
Then the boffins agreed that the brown wholemeal seed
was healthier for us all but
they have now changed their minds and with research they find
that white slices are good for the gut.
Twenty units of beer we could drink without fear
we were told by the powers that be
but Chief medical advisor who's paid to be wiser
says fourteen is better for me.
Since Adam was weeding the garden of Eden
by wheat and by grape we've survived
ignore the statistics, have bread ,beer and biscuits
and just enjoy being alive.
Categories:
wholemeal, food,
Form: Rhyme
The pigs got in my garden
They wrecked my vegetable patch
I chased them round all morning
But, not one, could I catch
I tempted them with biscuits
And a loaf of wholemeal bread
They did not seem impressed
They preferred my veg instead
Covered in dirt and sweaty
I continued with my task
Stripped to the waist and grubby
And wearing a muddy mask
My neighbours thought it funny
They were watching me with glee
So I stopped my amusing antics
And had a cup of tea
A plan, I thought, a plan
That’s what I really need
I drove down to the shop
To buy some fresh pig feed
I laid a trail of pig food
Across the garden, to the fence
They started taking notice
They started to see sense
Snuffling down the trail, they went
To the hole from whence they came
Through the gap into the field
To their piggy wig domain
© 03-12-2008
Categories:
wholemeal, animals, funny
Form: Light Verse
Tandoori,tikka bhuna
chicken ,anyway
samosas and pokoras
wholemeal chapatis
burfi and laddu
dhal but no
Ghee!
Categories:
wholemeal, food
Form: Epulaeryu