You know, I used to be happy all of the time.
what the heck happened? I used to go weeks
without crying, I used to love going to school.
In fairness, I liked real school - not the sad,
sterile, anti-social, virtual experience.
When I'm mad I get silly, then mean. I don't
always know why - angry is the answer, but
I don’t always get the subconscious analysis
behind it. That's a bad day - I'm truly sorry.
If I could step back, in those moments,
and think - clearly - I'm about the luckiest person.
I'm a hundred pounds of privilege
- if we rounding up - but pressurized,
stressed like a movie submarine in deep dive.
I think I miss people - like in an assembly
- before it starts - where a hundred conversations
clash like the random patter of rain. That’s one
of the sounds of joy.
The civilized brain is soaked in the opinions,
and shared experiences with others. These virtual,
interactive shadows on flat screens can't fill the void.
p.s. I write short stories too =]
My husband handed me a little blue bell
As a joke to see if I would use it to call him
I quickly got to thinking, what the h ?
Using it now for every little service or whim.
What the Heck Doc Got His Thumbs Under My Neck
What the!!! Hey doc what’s this
Put me back
I was find in heaven
Till I came down to
The Fallopian tube
What’s this place
And why yo thumbs under my neck
What the!!
Put me Back, Put me back
I’ didn’t ask to come here
Man, it’s bright, please turn off them lights
Where’s my mama at!
And did I tell you your hands are CoLd!!!
Wahh!
#E
Baby Face What's You Thinkin
12/17/18
written words by James Edward Lee Sr.
we're trapped, and,
inherently speaking
those of us here don't want us to escape : )
what a : )
........
life is time
time is life
it is mine
like a wife
there is no contradiction
(that is not how) it seems
we live in an abstract
(multi-dimensional) the means
ah, the mazes
the phases
the faces
of time
when will it end
these crazes of mine
when
will it end
these hazes of line
....
i see,
said the ban-she,
you are of the hinge
...me!?...am of the cringe,
the lock and the key...so please
allow me to flee...not flea...
oh gawd...it's all up to me...
it's enough to make one screee
...mmm...i've got a thought...a short time out,
try some p_t : )
......hmmm....a bit better....
now for meaning and force of letter,
..........
...need some supper.
When the sun don't shine, my stuff don't work
They grind to a halt, look up at me and smirk
They query, “what the heck”
My reply, “wait just a sec”
Blood will soon reach ya if only a squirt
6/30/17
What the heck
Is the reason for such disrespect
And neglect
Just trying to continue the trek
Without getting shipwrecked
I want to have a meaningful and positive effect
Instead of being inept
Still making moves, taking risks, with continual steps
In and out of the depths
With or without much rest
Just trying to do my best
Instead of beginning to stress
Throughout any test
Situations and work being assessed
For more or less
Whether it was simple or complex
Always cleaning up my own mess
And striving for success
Before I can no longer draw another breath
Due to my own death
Mostly made of water, bone and flesh
It wasn't always easy to express
And at times I only could guess
Might as well get it all off my chest
Never went in church to confess
Won and lost in chess
Still always felt blessed
And tried to have common sense
On either side of the fence
Whether the terrain was thin or dense
Nonetheless
This took a lot of effort, intellect
And finesse
Admittance of Your Guilt
Reflections
You did this and you did that
Having to explain my every move
With time difference so huge
Felt like a criminal
Nothing I said, you believed
What is the use of this?
A relationship so blessed
I felt like a spring flower
I guess winter came and turned it all sour
Because of my misunderstanding
My apology you did not accept
Because I questioned your integrity and honour
I’m not one to grovel I have self respect
So I asked someone for the terminology
Of my misunderstanding
Instead of accepting and explaining
You seek an argument
It was going nowhere
So I begged you to leave me alone
Is it a man thing?
You do not like confrontation
Shaking and crying at my desk
While you believe not a word I’ve said
I was once madly in love with you
Fought battles you know not,
To be with you
My family finally accept us
A little to late
What the heck am I thinking
I should maybe go drinking
And hear music plinking
With the glasses of clinking
See some girls winking
It has my eyes blinking
To be so drunk stinking
With all this linking
To a feeling of sinking
And the ego of shrinking
From all the unthinking
Sounds like fun
See ya later
What the heck is happening to me?
Seems that everyone just won’t let me be
First a crazy supervisor who hates me so
Think it’s my color or maybe my afro?
I try to be polite avoiding drama to no end
No matter what I try, I just can’t win
Then my roommate who just won’t leave
Sticking around like a patch on a sleeve
I keep smiling and holding up my chin
No matter what I try, I just can’t win
Last it’s the man who I do love
Found out he’s married, with blessings from above
No more honey now, especially for him
No matter what I try, I just can’t win
The empty bottles strewn all around
Explain the pain inside my head
As I wake up on the pulled out couch
That doubles as my bed
I don't recognize the feet
That are passed out by my face
I suspect they belong to the women's clothes
That are scattered about the place
The cable box displays three o'clock
I don't know if that's day or night
The pantyhose tied around my wrists
Are starting to feel a bit too tight
The spot on the ceiling spins in circles
There's **** playing on my TV
There's a guy eating cereal at the kitchen table
I have no clue who he might be
There's a slice of pizza sliding down the wall
An unlit bong drips on the floor
Two midgets wearing only sumo thongs
Just walked out the open door
There are lipstick drawings all over my body
A tattoo where yesterday there was none
The question that keeps spinning inside my head
Is, "Oh my God, what have you done?"
The naked lady sits up beside me
I am so relieved she looks just fine
She says, "That was fun, can we do it again?"
Sure. What the heck. What's one more time?
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